Story Trash to Treasure
- Thread starter Kathy in FL
- Start date
Sammy55
Veteran Member
Apparently, john70 doesn't like my comment. I meant no disrespect to Kathy. I hope you know that, Kathy! In fact, writing cliffs into a book is a sign of good writing, to keep the reader in suspense and wanting more. As a reader, the cliffs do heckle us ("na, na, na na na!) and they harass us, leaving us frustrated and wanting to know more as soon as possible...in fact, sooner than that!
And, boy, you do keep us in suspense, Kathy! Good suspense! We are always wanting more writing, more news about the characters, something, anything to get us and the characters off this cliff, to find out what's going to happen next.
A good book lives in the reader's head and thoughts when they aren't reading the book. A good book brings the characters to life so well that they can almost see them, hear them, feel them. A good book impacts the reader's life, making them learn and feel things they normally wouldn't. And, yes, a good book has cliffs that leave the reader thirsting and panting for more information. And you, Kathy, are a writer who writes great books, books that exceed in doing this, above and beyond the writer's expectations. If we didn't love your books, we wouldn't be reading them over and over and over again. You are a treasure, Kathy, and we appreciate you. Even when your cliffs heckle us! LOL!
And, boy, you do keep us in suspense, Kathy! Good suspense! We are always wanting more writing, more news about the characters, something, anything to get us and the characters off this cliff, to find out what's going to happen next.
A good book lives in the reader's head and thoughts when they aren't reading the book. A good book brings the characters to life so well that they can almost see them, hear them, feel them. A good book impacts the reader's life, making them learn and feel things they normally wouldn't. And, yes, a good book has cliffs that leave the reader thirsting and panting for more information. And you, Kathy, are a writer who writes great books, books that exceed in doing this, above and beyond the writer's expectations. If we didn't love your books, we wouldn't be reading them over and over and over again. You are a treasure, Kathy, and we appreciate you. Even when your cliffs heckle us! LOL!
Sammy55, what you did, you blackguard , you woke me up, the pc said something was added to
Trash to Treasure YESTERDAY
i got up,out of my sickbed,first, i had to go all the way to the kitchen to get coffee,
so, i could see the keys
to get to the site
to see new chapters.
my hopes were skyhigh
it was a GREAT day, IT WOULD BE A GREAT DAY.
WHEN I GOT THERE, WHAT DO I FIND,
I FIND POST 81,
I DO NOT EVEN KNOW HOW TO DO STUFF LIKE THAT
I FEEL SO DUMB DUMB DUMB
I WENT BACK TO BED
SO, THIS MORNING, AT 0703
the pc said something was added to
Trash to Treasure
IT STARTED ALL OVER AGAINi got up,out of my sickbed,
first, i had to go all the way to the kitchen to get coffee,
so, i could see the keys
to get to the site
to see new chapters.
my hopes were skyhigh
it was a GREAT day, IT WOULD BE A GREAT DAY.
WHEN I GOT THERE, WHAT DO I FIND,
I FIND POST 82,
I DO NOT FIND A CHAPTER
I AM FORCED TO DROUND MY SORROW IN COFFEE,
Sammy55, HE CAN SPELL, HE CAN TYPE
HE CAN DO UPPER AND LOWER CASE,HE WOULD KNOW HOW TO TYPE " DIE IN WATER"
SUCH A LOW POINT,,,I KNOW THE REST OF THE DAY
MUST BE BETTER
MAYBE
YMMV
OTHER THAN THAT, MRS. LINCOLN, HOW WAS THE PLAY
I BET Sammy55 CAN SPELL LINCOIN
I THINK I WILL STOP AND HAVE SOME COFFEE
CHAPTER 27
Some things are just ingrained. Chay and I might still have been at loggerheads, but Chief Jackson had drilled it into our heads that signal would not to be taken any other way but seriously.
We take off at a jog and arrive about the same time as the rest of the crew to find Chief Jackson there with another man in a suit and a woman crying. I see Chay from the corner of my eye do a double take and ask, “Chief, what’s the emergency?”
“We had reports that one or more trainees had run.”
“Who?”
“You two.”
“Me and Bam-Bam?! Why?”
“No you and Trainee Trahern.”
“Excuse me?! Why would we do something so lamebrained as that? Besides, isn’t Big Brother watching? Wouldn’t you have known if we’d run off before we’d even made plans for it?”
“Are you calling me a liar you little tramp?! I saw him stalking me!” The woman hissed.
I admit that I was a little sensitive about being called a tramp so I let my mouth be freer than it should have. “Are you out to make yourself into an even bigger fool than you already look? Because calling me a tramp, under the circumstances, is not the brightest idea anyone could have. Mr. Lawyer, for that is who you must be, I did a little checking up on this family you are representing and unless you want me to start spewing some facts I suggest you inform your client that whatever is in the wind is not going to work.”
Chief several people snapped, “McCormick!”
“Oh ho, so not everyone did their homework. They just assumed these schmucks had a case. I didn’t tell Trahern … yet … but I’m going to.”
That’s when Judge Haygood came of the shadows. “Your Honor, are you aware that she lost custody of Rolly to the guy that turned out to be his bio dad?”
“I’m aware.”
“Oh. Well are you aware that her parents are in the hots with the IRS?”
“I am.”
“Oh.” Some of the air went out of my balloon. “You probably know a ton more than me then. I’ll just keep my mouth shut unless she unwisely calls me a tramp again. If she does, then I might be forced to say that she lost the boy because some nasty pictures came out of some VR parties she’s been attending. I’ll also refrain from pointing out her complexion is as fake as the spray on tan the high school cheer captain used to have in the middle of winter and is probably to cover up that she spends more time in a VR helmet than she does in the daylight.”
Apparently the Judge hadn’t known that tidbit, I could see it in his eyes, and that he didn’t like me knowing something he didn’t. He didn’t strike me as the type of man that appreciated surprises. What I’d said was all hypothetical but I saw the Judge look at Mr. Lawyer and I saw the shark, despite the cool morning air, had started to sweat out the underarms of his expensive suit. That was either some bad hyperhidrosis or the man was big time nervous.
“Hmmm, I believe we have some things to … discuss. You and your client will accompany me. Now. And Jackson? Send Trainee Trahern to Detention Hall.”
“I know, I know,” I told Chief Jackson when he turned to me. “I’m going.” I was walking away but when Chay grabbed my arm I jerked it away and kept walking.
I’d known the possibility. I knew that there would be a cost to standing up to a bully. There always is. I knew that I didn’t rate any special dispensation over how someone else got treated. What I didn’t think through was that there might be a cost for Bam-Bam. Detention Hall was the place they sent you if you were “incorrigible” and supposedly needed a time out, like you were some unruly two-year-old. But what they called it and what it was didn’t necessarily jive. Detention Hall wasn’t “time out,” it was solitary confinement of the old fashion kind and included nothing but water on the menu for four days. I could do it, but I was so angry that they’d add Bam-Bam into it that I decided that trust was not something any of them deserved ever again.
I did the four days of detention with no complaints. Chief Delray kept checking on me and I asked her not to get in trouble by treating me any different since no one else had. If the others didn’t see the difference, they’d just rag on her for pointing it out.
“Trainee …”
“Yes ma’am?”
“This … this is for your own good,” she said like she was forcing herself to believe it. “You have to learn to do things in the appropriate fashion.”
“Yes ma’am,” I answered politely but as coldly as I could get away with.
She sighed and left.
Oh, I’d learned things all right. I’d learned who I could trust and who I was being stupid to trust. Busting on me was one thing. Busting on my baby? No. That you did not do. I went back to the group … they were no longer my crew in my mind … politely said good-bye to Lincoln and Markham when they left … and did what was asked of me. The guys tried to pretend everything was the same, but I wasn’t biting. I did my next assignment for Chief Haygood and he tried to talk me up, but I wasn’t biting. I kept things calm and professional. Chief Madison tried to touch on the subject in my counseling sessions and I refused to take the bait. Then the three Chiefs tried to hammer me at the same time, and I let them do the talking but refused to react the way they wanted me to react.
“McCormick, your changed behavior is becoming evident to everyone.”
“Good. They’ll see I’m following the rules and guidelines as written.”
“And what in the Sam Hill is that supposed to mean?”
“It means that I’m following the rules. I’m doing all assignments as asked of me. I am making the grades required. I am fulfilling all the orders from Chief Lark. I am passing all the pop inspections.”
“You’re like a damn robot.”
“I am a Trainee fulfilling what is required of me to the best of my ability while following all of the rules in order to learn what I am here to learn.”
Chief Delray said, “Don’t throw my words back at me McCormick.”
“I’m sorry if you feel that way Ma’am, that’s not what I’m doing. My apologies. I am simply saying that you are correct. I was sent to Detention to learn something and I did.”
“And that would be?”
“Don’t break the rules. Don’t mess with the chain of command. Do your job and keep your mouth shut. I beg your pardon Chiefs, but my son needs to be fed. May I be excused?”
Chief Delray gave me the okay before the other two could object. I was going to go to the Staff Lounge, but the guys and Jan and Jen were in there. I managed to almost make it back to my room when Chief Delray caught me.
“Aren’t you going to socialize with your friends?”
“No ma’am. No time to socialize. Bam-Bam needs to be fed and then I have homework to complete. The four days of detention and the work assignments given me while in there put me back in my other courses … as it was designed to do.”
“Are you blaming us for that?”
“No ma’am. It was my choice.”
“Your … choice?”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Explain.”
“I need to feed Bam-Bam.”
“And my eyes are not going to fall out of my head because you nurse that child. Step into your room. I want an answer.”
I regretted not keeping my mouth shut.
“Now explain yourself.”
“No one made me be the nail looking for a hammer.”
“Enough with the homilies McCormick. Just explain it in as few sentences as possible.” She sounded tired.
“I know people are saying I did it for some misguided whatever for Trahern. Well he was only part of it. Mostly I did it for the little boy and because I hate bullies.”
When I stopped and didn’t offer anything else she shook her head and said, “All right, let me rephrase it. Enough sentences that I can understand.”
Trying not to let my feelings show I nonetheless said, “I don’t know if there are enough sentences to make you understand it … at least from my perspective. I’ve been bullied most of my life. Even with being adopted by two loving people that became my parents in fact and not just on paper, bullies were just a fact of life for me. You’ve seen my file. You know what I looked like. You know what I had to go through just to get to look mostly normal. This scar on my face is the best it is going to get, and it is way better than what I used to look like, and people still think they have a right to treat me differently because of it. The guardian – my father’s stepmother – I had after my parents died was a bully in her own way. Sure, she was doing things ‘for my good’ because of all her special training and what she believed in but that didn’t stop the way she was doing it from making her a bully. And it just goes on and on. Being bullied gives you a perspective others don’t or can’t have.”
“And you think Trahern was being bullied.”
“I know he was being bullied but he’s a grown guy and he has a right to choose to do whatever about it. If he’s determined to lay down on the railroad tracks of life to be run over, not a whole lot I can do to stop him. But what they were all doing to that little boy? Now that I could do something about. And I did … by shining the light on the nasty part of what was happening.”
“You didn’t collude with Trainee Trahern on this?”
“No. Of course not. I didn’t want to tell him the little boy had been taken away from the woman that was supposed to be his mom. I didn’t want to tell him whatever illusion he had about his ex-wife was stupid, that there were valid reasons for the boy to be taken from her. I didn’t want him wondering whether the kid had gone from the frying pan into the fire.”
“And has he?”
“Huh?”
“Has the child gone from the pan to the fire?”
“I don’t know. Not my purview and above my pay grade.”
“Then how did you know about the rest of it?”
It took a lot to not roll my eyes and get marked as just being a teenager. Somethings in life are a lesson you only have to learn once. I explained, “Civil and criminal cases are considered part of the public domain in Florida and are online for anyone to look up by county with only a very few exceptions. They don’t put transcripts online or copies of court documents for certain types of cases … like family court … but they do give the names of the parties, lawyers, and judge involved. They do list the motions that the lawyers file, just not what the content is. It was easy to pull it all together and find out the facts and then take the facts and build the picture. Basically, she forced the guy to get a paternity test so she could sue for support. Then the guy countersued for visitation. Then the guy sued for custody. Then there was a motion for support against Trahern’s ex which means that baby momma lost custody and had to pay baby daddy instead of the other way around. I figured out why by looking up arrests and some other stuff in the clerk of court’s filings. Beyond that I know enough about VR addiction because of a cousin to add two and two to figure out what happened and how she lost custody because one of the motions in the custody case were multiple admissions of media. And young, gorgeous women who get hooked into the VR world generally forget that it really isn’t just pictures and it is being recorded so it can be played over and experienced again and again until they get bored and go onto the next ‘it isn’t real so it can’t hurt me’ VR experience.”
With some exasperation in her voice she asked me, “Trainee do you think the Staff here are innocent know-nothings?”
“It’s none of my business either way.”
“Excuse me?” she asked when my response surprised her.
“Chief, if you are trying to tell me you all have it going on with lots of training and you know what you are doing … you don’t have to tell me, you’ve already shown me. If you are trying to say that I can trust you because of that …” I stopped, unwilling to snap at the one person that had acted concerned.
“What’s that face for?”
“Chief, I’m trying not to appear, or even be, disrespectful. But what you need to understand is that you all did your job … and I learned my lesson. I didn’t expect to come out of the situation unscathed. I weighed the risks and thought that little boy was worth my actions. I didn’t do it for self-aggrandizement or fraternization or whatever it is you all have put in my file. I even admit to being concerned that I would lose one or more friends over this. But for me, it is just this simple. I thought the bullies needed to be … maybe not stopped … but that I could but a bump in their road. The side benefit was supposed to be Trahern maybe making that next step to where he could start seeing his worth isn’t based on what other people tell him it is. What I should not have done was forget it wasn’t just me that would pay any penalty. I can do alone. It sucks but I can do it. And I’ve been hungry, can do hungry standing on my head. I’ve been on the street … maybe not for months and years on end but long enough that I understand hunger more than the average person would and know I can deal with it. But …”
“But?”
“For each of the four days I spent twenty hours in a shoe box of a room with no light, no heat, and this rinky dink window that didn’t even have a screen in it to keep the bugs out. I went in while it was dark and I came out it was dark. While in that box I was to do the assignments given to me and be silent, if I wasn’t an alarm would go off … a freaking ear-bleedingly loud alarm. While in the box I got one ounce of water per hour. One ounce. And nothing else. And I had my baby with me … my baby that I am still nursing, a baby too young to understand what silence is and would set off that alarm and only get more upset. I didn’t really expect you people to give a shit about me … but I gave you credit when I didn’t think you’d put my baby at risk. So like I said, I learned my lesson. And it is one that I will not unlearn, not even if hell freezes over. I’ll take my demerits now Chief.”
Instead of replying she turned and left.
When Bam-Bam finished I went to go to the Dining Hall. I’d chosen to eat by myself since Detention. There were times I couldn’t get out of sharing the table, but I didn’t converse, didn’t interact any more than I could help it. That night Jan and Jen plopped down and said, “You didn’t stop to help us with the math.”
“You forget, I know you don’t need my help with the math.”
“The guys need the help.”
“Then you help them, I’ve got a freak ton of homework of my own to dig out of.”
“You … uh … didn’t do it while you were in detention?”
“No. They have different assignments while you are in there.”
“All … uh …”
I looked at her and cut through all the BS. “You read the rules. You know what happened.”
“They why do it?”
“Because I made the choice. Now excuse me, I have homework.” I got up and left before the guys could finishing getting their trays and come over.
Because I was doing so much work for Chief Lark he had assigned me a code to get into a lock box that held keys for the laundry area. I got all my stuff that I would need and took it over to the big shed where the machines were, grateful that I was leaving all of the noise and people behind. Thirty minutes later I grabbed up a bottle of detergent and prepared to throw it.
“Whoa! Don’t do it, ‘cause I can’t out run it!”
“Cooper!” I wanted to call him a dirty name, but I was trying to have some standards, not to mention I’d been cursing way too much where Bam-Bam could hear it and the first real sentence he said I didn’t want to contain something inappropriate. “What do you want? I’m busy.”
“Yeah. I see. Playing catch up.”
“Yeah. So spit it out.”
“Don’t need to. Tried to explain it to them but they ain’t listening. They don’t want to hear it.”
“What? Are you even making any sense?”
“I have all them sisters remember. So maybe they’ve been good for something. I might not understand fee-males but I’m not a complete idiot either. You ain’t gonna be talked out of this. For some reason you feel like we let you down. That we aren’t your friends anymore.”
Feeling a little tired and cranky and just done for the day I told him, “You bunch were never my friends. I was forced on you. Eventually you learned to put up with me and turned it into some kind of little mascot crap, but I was never more than that and don’t try and tell me I was. You didn’t really know me and still don’t. I’m useful on occasion but you can get along just fine without me.”
“Uh … little harsh there.”
“No. Just finally being honest with myself. This place? It’s here to teach us about real life. I already knew more about real life than I wanted to. I thought of this place as being different … a reprieve. It’s not. It’s just a point on a map. I learn what I need to learn and then I will be hustled on down the road. We all will. In different directions. There are no friends here.”
“Doe …”
“Don’t …”
“C’mon Kid.”
“And stop that too. I’m not a kid. And I’m done playing at being one to make everyone comfortable, to make it easy on them … and myself. The only people that have ever chosen me were my parents and one was murdered on the job and the other was killed by a disease. No one … and I mean no one else has ever chosen me. I’ve always been foisted onto people. Even here where they took me against their better judgment because someone pulled some strings. Well I am done with that. I am going to be the mom that my son needs me to be. I am going to protect him and teach him and raise him. Me. I’m what he has. Anything else is just an illusion. And I’m done with illusions and I am done with camouflage.”
He limped over to me and said, “I’m still not getting it. Did you think we could … I don’t know … make them not …”
“Argh! Will you go away! Stop pretending!”
“Hey, I ain’t pretending.”
“Bull crap.”
“That place really messed you up.”
“What? Their stupid little box? No. I didn’t like it, but I’ve dealt with worse.”
“Then what?! I’m not getting it!”
“Stop … pretending … you … care. You and all the others are the same. I did the crime, I knew I could do the time … but Bam-Bam was innocent, he did nothing wrong. Yet he was in there with me, suffered more than I did … that damn alarm that any little noise would set off. Babies aren’t built to be silent. He still jumps at noises and covers his little ears like he is afraid of being hurt.” I wanted to lash out but couldn’t, not and keep my self-respect. Instead I kept going. “His only food is me … but I barely got enough water to drink to then need to go to the bathroom. And has anyone given one shit to ask how Bam-Bam did? It’s all about ‘it was for your own good and it was to teach you a lesson.’ Day late and dollar short, life already taught me those lessons. But I stood up to the bully … for that little kid that was getting used, for Trahern, for me … even for his ex that will hopefully get help for her VR addiction now that it is out in the open. And I did it without needing to be given some kind of reward. I was willing to take the heat. I just did the dumb stupid and forgot this isn’t just about me … but about Bam-Bam too. The biggest lesson though is I learned he has no one but me and I have no one but him. No one is to be trusted to look out for him, no one deserves that kind of trust from me ever again.”
“We didn’t say thank you, didn’t ask if you were okay. Is that it?”
“Get the wax out of your ears. I … don’t … need … thank you. Don’t want it. That’s not why I did it. I didn’t expect you to ask about me because I thought I’d proven myself enough that you knew I could do that sort of thing standing on my head, even four days of it. But not once … not once … has anyone in this place … from Chief to counselor to nurse to … whatever the hell you people are … none of you asked about my baby. A baby. My baby. Went in that detention box. No one … not even my so-called friends, tried to see if they could take care of him so he wouldn’t have to suffer. The staff didn’t say we’ll keep him in the clinic. No one said jack crap. That tells me all I need to know. And I will never forget that lesson. Never. Now leave me alone. I have work to do.”
CHAPTER 28 - 1
he next day I showed up for jujitsu as normal. There were four new trainees there, all male. And given they weren’t wearing the orange clown suit I realized a new semester of trainees had been brought in. For a while all I could think was that I only had a semester left to suffer through The Farm.
I could tell right away they didn’t want to be there and singled me out as the weakest link they could push around. Bad mistake on their part. By the time practice was over all four of them could have used a trip to the clinic.
In their embarrassment they smarted off to Chief Jackson. “You’re just pushing us around. Making us look bad. She’s probably not even a kid, just looks like one, that’s probably not even her kid … just a prop to make us feel sorry for her, to make us weak.”
I shook my head. “One, you’re an idiot. Two, it is not a great idea to run your mouth at the Staff around here, especially not a Chief, and certainly not this Chief. Three, is a piece of free advice and it will be the only free thing you get from here. Get it through your thick skulls that this place isn’t freedom, a vacation, a reprieve, or anything else; it’s Purgatory. You either follow the rules, make the grade, and graduate or you’re gone and whatever is waiting for you out there eats you. And when you leave here, life is still gonna suck just as much as it did before, just in a different way. And for your info? No one here really cares about you so you can stop with the lame emoting. Oh you’ll get counseling and all of the happy crap that looks good on paper, but the reality is you are on your own. Take advantage of what is offered. Get smart. Earn a job. Then be prepared to look after yourself because no one else will.”
“Eres una chica loca.”
“Esa es mujer Y no soy el que está loco. Escucha lo que dije. Si no lo haces, te lavarás. Lo único que juegan aquí es juegos de cabeza. Así que no seas estúpido.” I let it sink in that I could understand all of their nasty muttering they’d been doing and then told them, “If you have any sense you’ll hear what I said. If not, it’s on you when you fail, wash out, and life sucks what little bit you have left out of your soul.”
I was losing interest in the drama and Bam-Bam needed to be fed before my own breakfast. I turned and waited to be dismissed and Chief Jackson nodded giving me the release I was looking for. Without another look around I took off back to my room. When I got there, I fell to my knees. One of the jerks obviously had a few street fights under his belt and had sucker bunched me in the kidney. I wanted to cry but wouldn’t allow myself because it would show on my face and people would talk.
I managed to feed Bam-Bam but it wasn’t all that satisfying for either one of us. He wanted something with a little more oomph to it so I pulled out one of the cups of baby food that Nurse Gilroy had started signing out to me for his use. His food wasn’t tracked like the older kids was because he didn’t eat in the dining hall. I kept a sheet and turned it into the clinic every other day; at the end of the week they would sign me out the next round of baby food.
Feeding Bam-Bam now took a lot more time. I couldn’t just haul out the food trough and let him go. Now there was prep, mess, and clean up. It wasn’t fun but it is how things worked so I accepted it, just a little grudgingly. I was late to breakfast and the tables were all full. I was just going to eat standing up but as I was looking for a place to do it the tray was taken out of my hands. Before I could jerk it back it turned out to be some girl I’d never seen before.
“Hi. My name is Barbie.”
“Uh …”
“I know. Stupid name. When I turn eighteen I’m changing it. Um … look, that Chief Delry said you’d explain things to me.”
I looked down and realized she was pregnant.
“Her name is Chief Delray, and to explain that you’d be better off talking to Nurse Gilroy.”
“Ha ha, you’re funny … in your own little mind and no one else’s. And just to get it out of the way I got knocked up by one of the guards in Juvie. So anyway, I got questions. There’s a hole over there, you eat, I’ll ask, you answer.”
I didn’t have any good way out of it, especially if Chief Delray had sent her my way. So I explained things … my way.
After I was full up of her questions and told her so she said, “Well, that’s better than I was getting from all those stupid forms and crap we had to fill out.”
“Don’t sell that stuff short, and don’t ignore it. You get quizzed on it pretty regularly.”
“Fun,” she said meaning anything but. “The Warden said this was a good place.”
I shrugged. “It’s a place,” I told her. “Whether it is good or not is up to you. Just don’t create some stupid fantasy around the people here. They’re just people. Take what they’re offering. Do yourself and your kid some good and …”
Abruptly she said, “I ain’t keeping it.”
“Oh.”
“Oh,” she said mocking me. “My IUD failed. I didn’t realize it until it was too late; thought no periods was just the thing doing what it was advertised to do. So anyway, I figure it’s like being sentenced to juvie … I did the crime, I do the time, give the kid to social services and walk away with a clean slate once I turn eighteen.”
I shrugged again. “Better than dumping the kid in the trash which is what my womb-donor did to me. And breakfast is over with. Let me see your schedule so I can point you in the right direction.”
I did and then headed to the bathroom hurting worse than I wanted to admit. Peeing hurt so bad I wound up throwing up my breakfast. I had a lifetime of practice dealing with pain, so I got a handle on it and then headed to Big Group. I was still playing catch up with all my academics and April, because all the foresty goodness that was growing hand over fist, only made it harder. We had to harvest enough to take back to the kitchens to feed us all. We didn’t do our job then we went hungry. The forage we were studying and harvesting included: ramps, wild ginger, more fiddleheads, wild violets, redbud flowers, daylily shoots, burdock, knotweed, nettle, dandelion, more chickweed and a ton of other wild greens, morels and oyster mushrooms, and that day in particular we were learning to gather cattail pollen which can be used as a partial replacement for wheat flour.
The water was cold. Too many of them splashed when it would have been better if they just carefully reached out and pulled the cattail heads to them and scraped the pollen into the collecting bag. There were a few times I wanted to toss someone in, but I kept hold of my temper and simply moved away from the group down to a quieter place.
That’s when I ran into Mari. “This is wrong,” she said grumbling to no one in particular. “They are messing the stream up. Taking things that aren’t theirs to take. Messing up Gaia’s beauty.” I’d noticed she’d slowly been abandoned by her former crew and felt a little bad for her. Some days she looked so lost and confused. I also heard she’d been forced to start taking medications. It wasn’t obvious whether they were helping her or the opposite.
“Think of it as stewardship … only we’re learning. Wouldn’t Gaia like that? That people were learning to take care of the Earth?”
“Huh?”
“Look, I know we’re all falling short. And some of them,” I said looking back at the big group. “Are falling pretty dang short. But they’ll be better tomorrow and better still the day after that. Spring has sprung and they’ve got the fidgets. Right now they are learning that taking care of the environment and living a more natural life can be fun. A first for a lot of them. Most of us come from the urban areas and this is as close to nature as we’ve ever been. Give us time.”
Changing subjects to find something else to complain about she pointed at Bam-Bam and said, “That … that … thing is a parasite.”
“Look, I’m making allowances for the fact you don’t want to be here and are having a hard time of it but don’t call my son a parasite.” I pulled back on the reins of my anger and tried to explain, “He’s the future.”
“What?”
“He’s the future, what I leave behind. I teach him how to take care of …” I held my hand out and pointed around. “This. I teach him how to do it the right way. And then he teaches who he leaves behind. If there are no more kids then there are no more … um … stewards to admire and take care of things.”
“There are too many as it is.”
“Are there? I get that some people make different choices. And honestly don’t know … can’t see it right now … that I’ll ever have another baby because I won’t do it by myself or selfishly put a kid in jeopardy by not having enough people around to take care of them and guide them in the right way to get along in this life. Not that there are many people you can trust in this life.”
“Gaia will send something to get rid of the too many.”
That was a little freaky and I told her, “Well hopefully if and when it happens, it won’t be someone else deciding for … uh … her. I mean people say a lot of crap like they have the ear of God and all of that, but I wouldn’t believe them ninety-nine percent of the time. Mostly all they are doing is trying to say they are more powerful and extra special and get something over on other people. Like you obey them or else instead of really looking at things from a logical perspective. I mean, regardless of what a person believes, if their worldview is that there is a Creator-being that created this world, and this world runs on laws of nature and logic, then someone should get that following the rules, the Creator will look out for them and what they’ve created. Especially if they are all powerful. Right?”
“Er …”
Before she could form a reply, we were called back in, but I turned the wrong way and a shock of pain went through my lower back. I don’t know if she meant to help or it was just accidental, but she reached out to keep me from falling into the water. Jan and Jen rushed over, and I had to back them up.
“Relax! She didn’t do anything wrong. If not for her Bam-Bam and I would have taken a mud bath.”
That’s when Chiefs Jackson and Madison came over. “Is there are problem Trainees?”
“No,” I told them. “Just a misunderstanding.”
Then Mari muttered, the side effects of the meds she was taking more and more evident, “I think she is hurt but I didn’t do it.”
Well that was a mess and I was sent off to the first aid station where I tried to convince them I did not need to go to the Clinic and seen by the nurse.
“It’s just a bruise,” I told them, not lifting my shirt. “I was training with newbs this morning and jiggled when I should have joggled. People are making more out of it than needs to be. I’ll take a hot shower. You don’t really want more paperwork do you? And seriously, I do not need to get any demerits.”
It was the last two sentences that caused them to say, “We’re just following the rules. You say it is a bruise. We have no reason to believe it to be anything else. Now stop wasting our time and creating drama.” In that moment I realized I’d finally learned how to work things. Always make a way for the rules to look like they are being followed to keep everyone out of trouble and people will generally do what you want.
It was time to go to small group and the idea of hiking made me want to puke again but I kept my face blank. I got lucky and all we did was go to a different stream and gather more pollen so we could make Cattail Pollen and Ramp Biscuits. I thought they came out pretty well, at least everyone ate them. The four new trainees were in the group again and tried to start something, wanting to know what a mujer … a mujer with a baby … was doing in their crew.
Chief Jackson took a jab at me and asked, “Want to answer that McCormick?”
I looked at the four new guys and said, “Simple answer, because someone else said so. I didn’t get to pick any more than you did. Deal with it and follow the rules. And for your info, I’m not your momma or your sister, I’m not picking up or cleaning your crap. Any mess you make you are responsible for. I’m also not here for fraternization so get that out of your head.”
“What’s that?”
“I’m not here for sex or to be any kind of extra special friend with benefits to any of you testosterone-poisoned specimens. And you don’t even want to know what will happen if you mess with my kid. Comprende?”
“You sure talk big for someone so small.”
Chief Jackson harrumphed and even those blockheads got the message. Later in the day we were walking along the water’s edge gathering more pollen … some of which I secretly was collecting for my own use … because the big group were mostly just playing. The survival trainees, which included our crew, gathered about a quarter of what was used at The Farm. I found out the rest was gathered by the special and advanced culinary teams. We were getting into the taller cattails and the Chief was minding the new trainees while the rest of us were supposedly trusted to work independently. The cattails were tall, so tall they were over our heads. I was gathering away when I heard a whispered, “Don’t freak, I’m coming up beside you.”
“Cooper, what do you want now?”
“Shhh. I don’t want the others to hear.” I nodded. “I gave some thought to what you said.”
“So?”
“So … I think maybe you’re right. I guess we just got so used to the kid being attached to you that … we didn’t … look, I’m sorry. I’m not going to say it for anyone else but … I am. That’s all. And … I’m gonna get in your business and you’re gonna get mad.”
“What now?” I asked as quietly as he was as I listened to the others who were a few yards away.
“You really just bruised or are you hurt? No games Doe. I won’t rat you out but … but just be honest.”
“Why the heck should you …”
“Care? ‘Cause if I had a little sister she’d probably be like you ‘cause you sure as hell are enough like my older ones that it is pretty damn uncomfortable on some days. So spill it already.”
“I took a kidney shot from the guy with half an earlobe. I’ll live. I’ve hurt worse. It’s just uncomfortable. And there’s not a thing you or anyone else can do about it. And keep it to yourself Mr. Nosey. I’m not looking for anyone’s sympathy or attention.”
“You sure that’s all it is?”
“Yeah but even if it isn’t, that’s on me not on you. Just keep your mouth shut.”
“People are going to notice tomorrow.”
“No they won’t. I have Academics.”
“Doe …”
Dallas called, “Hey Coop, where are you?”
Chapter 28 - 2
The man faded away faster than I expected and suddenly Dallas was nearly stepping on me. “Do I look like Cooper? No? Then back up already. You almost made me drop my container.”
“Well excuse the hell out of me.”
“There is no excuse for you Dallas. You are who you are.” I turned to try and slog back to the bank.
“It isn’t that way.”
“Yes it is,” I said sighing.
“No it isn’t.”
“Suit yourself,” I told him while I continued to go my own way knowing that the shortest way to the bank wasn’t the best because there was an unexpectedly deep place.
I was slogging then I heard him go down but didn’t hear him come up or start fussing. I was heading his direction without even thinking about it. “Cooper!”
Everyone heard my tone and started moving the direction of my voice. I slid in the mud and almost went down myself but grabbed Dallas by the hair and pulled him out of the underwater pit.
“Stay back! I don’t know where the edge is on your side. Come around. Dallas has cracked his head pretty bad. There’s a gash and …”
“’S okay,” he said when I felt someone pulling at Bam-Bam’s sling. “You up and out. We have him.”
“Don’t go that direction. There’s some kind of deep hole or something under the water.”
“Show us way around.”
I looked at him and he nodded. I stood up and using the makeshift staff that I’d been using most of the day I poked at the creek bottom and finally got us four to dry land. I turned to find Chay and Cooper carrying a still unconscious Dallas between them and then laying him down so Cooper could get a better look. While he was doing that Chief Jackson was on his sat phone calling for some assistance. The four trainees were just standing there staring.
About that time Dallas came around and said, “What the hell happened?”
I told him, “You got caught in the bed of a married woman and her husband kicked your butt.”
“Then why does my head hurt?”
“Butt … head … no difference between the two for you.”
It took a moment for what I said to get everyone’s attention and a moment longer for it to make sense for Dallas. “Damn your tongue is sharp.”
“Getting sharper with practice.”
“Damn sure is,” he muttered and then winced while Cooper put a pressure compress on the gash that was still bleeding.
I got up and went back to gathering pollen. When I felt the eyes of the newbs on me I gave them look for look. Finally one of them said, “Whatchoo doing?”
“Gathering pollen.”
“Why? No one else is.”
“I don’t do stuff just because someone else would or would not do it.”
“But we got a guy down.”
“Yeah, and we still have pollen to collect so we can eat. With one man down that means the rest of us need to collect more. Cooper is turning into our medic. Trahern is the muscle. That leaves me and thee to collect.”
“Huh?”
“You want a passing grade, or you want to have to listen to them tell you how you aren’t working hard enough?”
“Er …”
At that I ignored them and went back to collecting and kept right on doing it until it was decided we would have to walk out with our wounded. When Dallas tried to tell me to carry his gear Cooper overruled it and co-opted one of the new guys.
“Doe has enough to carry with her stuff and Bams. She can carry the forage. Chay, stop if he starts trying to dance instead of walk. You, you and you,” he said pointing to the three remaining newbs. “Get prepared to trade off. Dallas isn’t walking out of here unassisted. Doe, quickest way back to Base, just try and not have any major climbing.”
My compass stays on all the time and I’d already noted some alternate trails which matched the pictures in my head of the topo maps of the area that I’d seen. Soon enough I had us on a trail that intersected with a main road and Chief surprised us by calling for a truck to meet us to pick Dallas and Cooper up. The rest of us continued to hike back.
“Why couldn’t we ride like them?” One of the guys groused.
Chief Jackson looked like he was ignoring them so I answered, “Too much weight for one. It would slow them down. With this cloud cover it won’t take much for that solar mover to run out of power. And they also need room to move around in case something starts going SNAFU with Dallas. Besides, your legs ain’t broke. Stop acting like a bunch weenies. You have to be tougher than this. What were you in for?”
“Huh?”
“Are you GIs? Are you juvies? Are you on probation? What?”
“They don’t want us.”
“Who doesn’t?”
He shrugged and the way he did it I realized he was hurt or embarrassed.
“They’re trying to avoid the draft and their home country won’t take ‘em back,” Chay said in an aggressive glass on gravel growl.
Hearing the antagonism one of them asked, “So? Why would we want to wind up like you? All cut up and can’t talk.”
I sighed. “Better than having a major case of the stupids which is what you guys apparently have. What did you come here for if you didn’t want to follow the laws?”
“We was looking for work.”
“Sure you were. Whatever your reason, you made the choice and went through all the hassle to cross the border. You knew what you were getting into. Did you think freedom comes free? And what do you think you’re gonna get out of this place?”
“Maybe we don’t stay.”
“Too late Bruh. You’re already here and Big Brother watches everything around here. And he has a doggone long arm.”
He snorted like he didn’t believe me, so I gave him something to chew on, though why I was bothering I didn’t know.
“I spent four days in solitary confinement, 20 hours per day with 20 ounces of water each day and that’s it … and my baby had to go in there with me. Go ahead and act tough. Find out just how much no one cares. If they’d do that to a baby, what do you think they’d do to you?”
“They didn’t do that to no baby.”
“Ask anyone around, they’ll tell you that’s exactly what happened.”
We’d just gotten back to the main compound and I kept walking towards the dorms so that I could try and get a little homework in before dinner.
“But they say this is a good place.”
I snorted. “It’s a place. You get out of it what you put in.”
“But … they say …”
I turned and looked him square in the face, not caring who overheard. “Here’s a clue you should have learned a long time ago. People lie. People lie all the time. And the biggest lies they tell are about things that are supposed to be good. Just do your time and follow the rules or suffer the consequences. That’s all you’ve got.”
I turned back around and kept walking but bypassed my room to go to the bathroom. Before I could leave I was heaving again.
“Yo, you okay in there?”
I recognized Tracy from Child and Family.
“Yeah, just ate something new that didn’t set too well.”
“Oh … hey Doe. When you’re through you got a sec?”
I came out and washed my face. “Yeah?”
“Um … there’s a new girl, about your age, and …”
“A pregnant hot mess?”
After a momentary surprise she slowly grinned. “Take it you’ve met her.”
“Met her. Talked to her. Thanks to Chief Delray saying I could answer her questions. Let me guess, she already got in trouble.”
She nodded. “Came close. Just thought I’d warn you she’s kinda said a few nasty things about Child and Family.”
“Yeah. I expected it. She says she doesn’t belong in it since she isn’t keeping the baby. She gets real defensive at even the suggestion that she has any obligation or attachment to it.”
“You pegged her fast.”
“She’s gonna drive Chief Delray crazy.”
“Already is. Uh … I made third semester.”
“Hey congrats, I mean it.”
She smiled proudly and said, “Thanks. Anyway, just wanted you to know if you see me hanging around the Chief more than usual. I’m training in daycare management. I’m going to be doing rounds with her as part of my internship so … pop inspections and stuff. I don’t want any hard feelings.”
I wanted to ask her about her other plans but decided that was none of my business. “Everyone knows the rules, me included. So don’t sweat it, you’ve got a job to do ‘cause you want you and yours out of here as soon as possible with as much to look forward to as you can arrange.”
“Thanks … and if you can help keep an eye on the hot mess?”
“Uh …”
“I know … just make sure if you see her playing in the middle of the highway you tell somebody.”
“That bad?”
“Looking that way.”
“Lovely,” I said and she chuckled and we waived as we went our separate ways.
By the time I got back to my room I was seriously considering using the same excuse to get out of dinner but decided to save it in case I needed it for in the morning.
The man faded away faster than I expected and suddenly Dallas was nearly stepping on me. “Do I look like Cooper? No? Then back up already. You almost made me drop my container.”
“Well excuse the hell out of me.”
“There is no excuse for you Dallas. You are who you are.” I turned to try and slog back to the bank.
“It isn’t that way.”
“Yes it is,” I said sighing.
“No it isn’t.”
“Suit yourself,” I told him while I continued to go my own way knowing that the shortest way to the bank wasn’t the best because there was an unexpectedly deep place.
I was slogging then I heard him go down but didn’t hear him come up or start fussing. I was heading his direction without even thinking about it. “Cooper!”
Everyone heard my tone and started moving the direction of my voice. I slid in the mud and almost went down myself but grabbed Dallas by the hair and pulled him out of the underwater pit.
“Stay back! I don’t know where the edge is on your side. Come around. Dallas has cracked his head pretty bad. There’s a gash and …”
“’S okay,” he said when I felt someone pulling at Bam-Bam’s sling. “You up and out. We have him.”
“Don’t go that direction. There’s some kind of deep hole or something under the water.”
“Show us way around.”
I looked at him and he nodded. I stood up and using the makeshift staff that I’d been using most of the day I poked at the creek bottom and finally got us four to dry land. I turned to find Chay and Cooper carrying a still unconscious Dallas between them and then laying him down so Cooper could get a better look. While he was doing that Chief Jackson was on his sat phone calling for some assistance. The four trainees were just standing there staring.
About that time Dallas came around and said, “What the hell happened?”
I told him, “You got caught in the bed of a married woman and her husband kicked your butt.”
“Then why does my head hurt?”
“Butt … head … no difference between the two for you.”
It took a moment for what I said to get everyone’s attention and a moment longer for it to make sense for Dallas. “Damn your tongue is sharp.”
“Getting sharper with practice.”
“Damn sure is,” he muttered and then winced while Cooper put a pressure compress on the gash that was still bleeding.
I got up and went back to gathering pollen. When I felt the eyes of the newbs on me I gave them look for look. Finally one of them said, “Whatchoo doing?”
“Gathering pollen.”
“Why? No one else is.”
“I don’t do stuff just because someone else would or would not do it.”
“But we got a guy down.”
“Yeah, and we still have pollen to collect so we can eat. With one man down that means the rest of us need to collect more. Cooper is turning into our medic. Trahern is the muscle. That leaves me and thee to collect.”
“Huh?”
“You want a passing grade, or you want to have to listen to them tell you how you aren’t working hard enough?”
“Er …”
At that I ignored them and went back to collecting and kept right on doing it until it was decided we would have to walk out with our wounded. When Dallas tried to tell me to carry his gear Cooper overruled it and co-opted one of the new guys.
“Doe has enough to carry with her stuff and Bams. She can carry the forage. Chay, stop if he starts trying to dance instead of walk. You, you and you,” he said pointing to the three remaining newbs. “Get prepared to trade off. Dallas isn’t walking out of here unassisted. Doe, quickest way back to Base, just try and not have any major climbing.”
My compass stays on all the time and I’d already noted some alternate trails which matched the pictures in my head of the topo maps of the area that I’d seen. Soon enough I had us on a trail that intersected with a main road and Chief surprised us by calling for a truck to meet us to pick Dallas and Cooper up. The rest of us continued to hike back.
“Why couldn’t we ride like them?” One of the guys groused.
Chief Jackson looked like he was ignoring them so I answered, “Too much weight for one. It would slow them down. With this cloud cover it won’t take much for that solar mover to run out of power. And they also need room to move around in case something starts going SNAFU with Dallas. Besides, your legs ain’t broke. Stop acting like a bunch weenies. You have to be tougher than this. What were you in for?”
“Huh?”
“Are you GIs? Are you juvies? Are you on probation? What?”
“They don’t want us.”
“Who doesn’t?”
He shrugged and the way he did it I realized he was hurt or embarrassed.
“They’re trying to avoid the draft and their home country won’t take ‘em back,” Chay said in an aggressive glass on gravel growl.
Hearing the antagonism one of them asked, “So? Why would we want to wind up like you? All cut up and can’t talk.”
I sighed. “Better than having a major case of the stupids which is what you guys apparently have. What did you come here for if you didn’t want to follow the laws?”
“We was looking for work.”
“Sure you were. Whatever your reason, you made the choice and went through all the hassle to cross the border. You knew what you were getting into. Did you think freedom comes free? And what do you think you’re gonna get out of this place?”
“Maybe we don’t stay.”
“Too late Bruh. You’re already here and Big Brother watches everything around here. And he has a doggone long arm.”
He snorted like he didn’t believe me, so I gave him something to chew on, though why I was bothering I didn’t know.
“I spent four days in solitary confinement, 20 hours per day with 20 ounces of water each day and that’s it … and my baby had to go in there with me. Go ahead and act tough. Find out just how much no one cares. If they’d do that to a baby, what do you think they’d do to you?”
“They didn’t do that to no baby.”
“Ask anyone around, they’ll tell you that’s exactly what happened.”
We’d just gotten back to the main compound and I kept walking towards the dorms so that I could try and get a little homework in before dinner.
“But they say this is a good place.”
I snorted. “It’s a place. You get out of it what you put in.”
“But … they say …”
I turned and looked him square in the face, not caring who overheard. “Here’s a clue you should have learned a long time ago. People lie. People lie all the time. And the biggest lies they tell are about things that are supposed to be good. Just do your time and follow the rules or suffer the consequences. That’s all you’ve got.”
I turned back around and kept walking but bypassed my room to go to the bathroom. Before I could leave I was heaving again.
“Yo, you okay in there?”
I recognized Tracy from Child and Family.
“Yeah, just ate something new that didn’t set too well.”
“Oh … hey Doe. When you’re through you got a sec?”
I came out and washed my face. “Yeah?”
“Um … there’s a new girl, about your age, and …”
“A pregnant hot mess?”
After a momentary surprise she slowly grinned. “Take it you’ve met her.”
“Met her. Talked to her. Thanks to Chief Delray saying I could answer her questions. Let me guess, she already got in trouble.”
She nodded. “Came close. Just thought I’d warn you she’s kinda said a few nasty things about Child and Family.”
“Yeah. I expected it. She says she doesn’t belong in it since she isn’t keeping the baby. She gets real defensive at even the suggestion that she has any obligation or attachment to it.”
“You pegged her fast.”
“She’s gonna drive Chief Delray crazy.”
“Already is. Uh … I made third semester.”
“Hey congrats, I mean it.”
She smiled proudly and said, “Thanks. Anyway, just wanted you to know if you see me hanging around the Chief more than usual. I’m training in daycare management. I’m going to be doing rounds with her as part of my internship so … pop inspections and stuff. I don’t want any hard feelings.”
I wanted to ask her about her other plans but decided that was none of my business. “Everyone knows the rules, me included. So don’t sweat it, you’ve got a job to do ‘cause you want you and yours out of here as soon as possible with as much to look forward to as you can arrange.”
“Thanks … and if you can help keep an eye on the hot mess?”
“Uh …”
“I know … just make sure if you see her playing in the middle of the highway you tell somebody.”
“That bad?”
“Looking that way.”
“Lovely,” I said and she chuckled and we waived as we went our separate ways.
By the time I got back to my room I was seriously considering using the same excuse to get out of dinner but decided to save it in case I needed it for in the morning.
Lake Lili
Veteran Member
Its a hard lesson and one I learned too. I have a special needs kid (ADHD/Autistic and genetic deletion but nothing so severe it has kept him from enlisting in the Army), but when he was little, trying to find someone who would be guardian, or even emerg back-up, in the event of a problem taught me everything I need to know about my family and friends and who is worth my time and energy. I will never never ever forget that.
Thanks Kathy!
Lili
Thanks Kathy!
Lili
Sammy55
Veteran Member
Hahahahaha!!
At least THIS time, john70, there's something new for you to read!!
Thanks, Kathy! I'm loving all the new reading you're giving us. I'm overdosing on it even though I should make it last. It's just too hard to portion out your great writing to last longer. It's just too hard.
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Thank you Kathy.
Sammy55
Veteran Member
Now I'm caught up with this one. And, BOY, can I empathize with Doe and Lake Lili! I've found out that I can't rely on or trust many in my family, but not because of my child but because of myself. And that really hurts! I've come to realize that I can only trust myself to do what I need to do, I can't rely on others for help, even my family...unless I pay them for help. And even then, the "help" I pay for many times is not very good. So, I'll do what I need to do for me, pay for the important things to get done that I can't do, and overlook the rest that I can't do. It's very sad, but - like Doe - I've gotten to the point that I don't like and won't ask for help. Not because I'm too proud, but because I hate being turned down or made to feel like I'm an inconvenience, an obligation. And that's a terrible way to feel when I've spent a lifetime taking care of my kids and grandkids and parents and every/anyone who needed help. I'm now older and need the help, and nobody really cares or makes the time to help me. I've spent my years helping because the person was family, or I loved them, or they needed help, or God told me to do it. But people nowadays always want and expect help but they don't help others. And if they do, it's an inconvenience to them, even if you are family and always gave help to them before. I'll leave it at that otherwise I'll end up a crying, hot mess and I've got too much to do. 
(Sorry, Kathy, for raining on your stories.)
(Sorry, Kathy, for raining on your stories.)
CHAPTER 29
Homework and dinner were a misery. There was a lot of new people that had no clue how things worked so everything was slow and confused. I noticed a lot of missing faces so Lincoln and Markham weren’t the only graduates that were gone but there seemed there were more people than empty places. Then on top of that we were all required to attend a meet and greet bonfire. I was in the middle of the ubiquitous cup of hot chocolate when someone accidentally runs into my back before walking away after a perfunctory apology. I lock my knees to keep from going down then had to run to the bushes and up comes dinner and the cocoa.
“Doe?”
I finally caught a breath and gasped, “Go away Cooper.”
“You told me it was just a bruise.”
“It is.”
“How bad of a bruise.”
“You ever been kidney punched by someone twice your size?”
“Well Shit. Let’s go.”
“No. You promised.”
“Only so long as it wasn’t bad.”
“There’s nothing anyone can do, and I’ve seen all the inside of the clinic I want to see. I don’t need another bill because I found out that being in detention wiped out all of the progress I’d been making; and I don’t need Gilroy to have another reason to ride her broom in my direction and dock me for that on top of it. I also don’t want to have to listen to yet another lecture from Chief Jackson who’ll add more new lessons because I’m still working on the ten that came before. Cut me some slack already.”
“Doe …”
“No.”
“Look … are you … um …”
I could see him get red even in the shadows.
“Geez. Yeah, I’m peeing just fine. And I’ll live if people will stop hitting the same spot. Now stop before we get noticed and Big Brother gets involved. Go back to the others. I’m going to sign out and then go back to my room. I have a crapton of homework.”
“When do you not have a crapton of the stuff?”
“Never. Always. Whatever. Just stop checking up on me already.”
“Someone needs to. I been thinking.”
“Oh that’s what that smell is.”
“And being a smart ass ain’t gonna change it so just deal.” After a pause he said, “We shoulda checked on you.”
“I don’t need anyone …”
“At the least we coulda made sure … I mean … we heard the alarm going off over and over again and … and it just didn’t click. It should have. I guess we kinda thought you were doing it on purpose for some reason that didn’t make sense. But … maybe … look I’m saying I don’t have no excuse. I’ve got more nephews and nieces than a sane man should. Kids make noise. It’s in their DNA or something. I … I just … look, I’m sorry. That’s all I got.”
“Let it go Cooper and stop straining something before you get a hernia.”
“But it ain’t the same as it was.”
“No.”
“But why? If I explain it to the others.”
“No.”
“But …”
“Cooper. Drop it. I’m not going back. There’s nothing to go back to. There never was. It was just some fantasy that I imagined … being one of you, this place being some place safe, special. Bam-Bam and I being one of you. I figured it out and can’t go back to pretending. You were just doing your job. That’s all it was. So you feel bad about what happened. Fine. Just use the lesson you learned from this the same as I am. My lesson is mine. Your lesson is yours and so is what you do with it. You three are grown men, it was stupid to think you were … whatever it is I thought. Play time is over. Now comes reality. Bam-Bam and I are alone and I’m learning how to live with that; getting better at it every day. Now move, I’ve got homework to do.”
“Ain’t you gonna ask about Dallas?”
“I already did. No concussion but a bad headache. His artificial leg hit the mud on the edge of the pit and went out from under him. It has made him feel sensitive so he’s going to emote his discontent and embarrassment for a day or three. After that he’ll conquer it and move forward. The end. Same thing that happened when jujitsu practice first started. Seems to be his SOP.”
Cooper snorted. “You’ve definitely got his number. What do you think of Chay?”
“Nothing.”
“Wha … huh?”
“He let me know in no uncertain terms that he and his life was none of my business.”
“Naw, he didn’t mean that.”
“That’s what he said. I’m taking him at his word. So be it. I’m out of his business.”
“But … but …”
“He doesn’t need me or whatever you’re thinking. None of you do. You got along just fine before I came along. Better than fine, you were making leaps forward in your progress and you were doing it without my help. You’ll do the same when The Farm sends us in different directions. You should be proud of that. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I couldn’t move. I know I needed to. Bam-Bam needed me. That got me going. So did when I heard someone from another room complain, “Shut the kid up already!”
It was dark, the kind of dark that meant it was almost time for me to get up but I could barely move. I got things so that Bam-Bam could feed but I just laid there and tried to remember why I felt so bad. Finally, my brain came to life and I groaned silently, hoping to survive the day.
When I finally made it to the bathroom I thought I was lucky there was no one else in there because when I lifted my shirt there was a gawd-awful bruise spreading out from where the guy had got me a good one. I was just about to drop my shirt when I heard, “Holy @#$% that’s gotta hurt!”
I spun and nearly went down but caught myself on the sink. Bam-Bam, in a good mood, laughed because he thought I was dancing on purpose.
Barbie put her hands up when she caught the look on my face. “Hey, none of my business if that’s the way you want it. Just tell me if that’s what I have to look forward to.”
Sighing I steadied myself, “No. I just got the extra special because we’ve got four new trainees that don’t get the difference between jujitsu and street fighting. I taught them, but it came at a cost.”
She snorted from the inside of the bathroom stall she walked into. “You sure? ‘Cause you look like you got the losing end.”
“Lucky punch is all.”
“Why didn’t you go to that Nurse Gilroy. She seems like the type that loves to take care of people and gets her feelings hurt if you don’t let her.”
I chuckled a little. “Oh you she’s gonna love. She’s not bad, just I’ve had enough.” I thought about warning her about wasting whatever credit she builds up but no one told me and it might be and I figured that it might be different in her case. “Look … uh …”
“Hey, like I said, none of my business and I know how to keep my mouth shut. But if the kidney is bruised I wouldn’t screw around. One of my mom’s boyfriends used to consider the kidney punch his tap of extra lovin’. Mom finally got shed of him but she’s still paying for his love with a kidney infection a couple of times a year.”
I muttered, “And they think I’m strange.”
This time it was her that chuckled. “People gotta label, it’s what they do. See ya, wouldn’t want to be ya. Least not for the next few days.”
“Geez. Thanks.”
Barbie was weird but so far nothing I couldn’t deal with.
I made it to jujitsu practice without puking but that’s only because there was nothing to puke up. And when I got there I don’t know how but Cooper teamed with me for the entire session leaving Chay to work off his attitude with the newbs. In fact, it was a little weird but Cooper made it so no one got close to me.
“Stop laying it on so thick,” I gritted in his ear during one block practices. “Someone is going to notice.”
Next block he said, “No they won’t. Chief is too involved with the newbs and Chay is too pissed at the world.”
I realized he was right and decided just to go with it to save myself some pain. Breakfast was a blur and then I headed to Academic Hell … Hall … Academic Hall. It just felt like hell. My performance speed was down. I still managed to get the right answers, but it took me longer to come up with them. Thankfully I had a room to myself because Bam-Bam was a distraction to the other trainees, or so said Chief Clancy with her usual less-than-patient tone. By lunch I was ready to puke again and because it was something spicy I got my get-out-of-jail-free card from Gilroy and got to pick chicken noodle soup as an alternative. There was a scuffle and I used it to cover getting rid of it before I had to eat it. I managed to finish out the rest of Academics and then headed back to my room without another lecture because she was too busy praising someone that managed to pass their first ESL test. Lucky for me it was supposed to be my “off” night from other courses and I normally used it to catch up on my homework for the week, but I was done in. I knew Bam-Bam wouldn’t sleep that early so I got down on the floor with him and corralled him so he couldn’t get into anything and just tried to rest while he did his thing.
A little earlier than normal he crawled over and snuggled up for his last meal of the day and we both must have dozed off because the next thing I remember is, “McCormick? Move over to the bed. Neither one of you needs to sleep on the floor like this. McCormick? Doe?”
I wasn’t really awake and then I hear, “Oh crap. Chief, look it.”
I still couldn’t be bothered to wake up which should have bothered me but didn’t. It was some hours later I heard, “You don’t understand. I mean I know you’re fee-male and all but you’re still missing it. Doe already had trust and personal space issues. I mean she keeps it under control most of the time but it’s there. She lost her folks which was strike one, or maybe it goes back even further than that with being born the way she was. Either way there’s been so many strikes after that if I was her I’d a given up a long time ago. But not her. She keeps trucking along, trying to hang on to a good attitude, trying to believe there’re still good things out there and good people like her parents that will help her reach ‘em, but she ain’t really trying for her, but for her little boy. See, I been trying to be more of a thinking man but it ain’t pleasant work I can tell you ‘cause you start seeing and understanding things that it would be a whole hell of a lot easier to ignore.”
Chief Madison was irritated and asked, “Do you have a point Cooper?”
“Yes ma’am. See I know what it’s like to be the unwanted one. I’m the youngest … well you know the story since it is in my file. But no matter how I talk about ‘em my sisters aren’t completely rotten and even now they send a letter every now and again. Doe ain’t got nothin’ like that, no one like that. She was a throw away baby with a lot of medical issues, then she got adopted which was the best time of her life … only she had that stolen from her in the worst way. And every little bit of security she should have had after that went sideways too. So she winds up here, and in self-defense maybe makes it out to be more than she should have. Despite it all she’s got an uncomfortable streak of idealism that gets her into trouble. Like with that bully business. She’s willing to take the heat to stand up for her principles only … only she thinks people have her back.”
“We do but there are things you don’t do, and she needed to learn she’d stepped over the line.”
“Yeah, like you say, there’s things you don’t do. And you don’t do to a baby what you did to her. She was willing to take the heat, even understood there’d be consequences, but she thought we’d all draw the line at hurting a kid … at hurting her kid. See she’s stopped believing that anyone will pick her, choose her, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to believe the same thing could happen to her baby. And when it did, I’m guessing maybe the last little bit of trust in people finally broke … and it took a whole lot of other stuff with it. And that’s a damn shame because once you learn that kinda lesson, you can never go back.”
There was silence and I wanted to tell Cooper to shut up but nothing worked except my ears. I was so tired.
“Counseling will …”
“Sorry ma’am but you don’t know Doe. What you people broke, what you broke on purpose, and what the rest of us just sat on our asses and let get broke … is not the kind of thing you can fix. The only way to fix it was for it not to happen in the first place. I don’t understand what the Judge was thinking. I don’t understand what any of us were thinking. We all knew she had a baby with her. No one would have done it had she still been preggers. And even with her trust and space issues she would have let someone keep Bams safe, because back then she trusted us, at least enough. She wouldn’t have liked it but for his sake she would have let someone else take him, keep him safe, while she did her time. But not a damn one of us stepped up. None of us wanted to know so we … we just blanked it out, stayed away.”
I heard Chief Delray say, “I did not.”
“No ma’am, but that’s your job. You’re supposed to check up on the people in Child & Family. Just like Chief Jackson checks up on the ex-GIs here at The Farm. Just like Chief Madison oversees the dorms and making sure people keep their crap together and don’t wreck the place up. We’re all just your job. And most of us around here got that figured out with no hard feelings; even with the damage we have we know not to take things too personally. But … maybe it’s her age or something, I don’t know … Doe was taking it personally. She imagined she was something more than just a name on a roster, someone’s job. She gave everyone the benefit of the doubt and wanted to believe things that maybe she shouldn’t … but the fact that she did believe ‘em didn’t make your job any harder.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Chief Madison said like Cooper had his toes right on the line.
“It means that she could have been a much bigger problem than she was. Instead, because she took it personal, took your attention personally and appreciated it, she made sure she wasn’t a problem. It wasn’t just a matter of pride like it is for some of us … doing it to prove we’re better than where we came from. She was better for that baby’s sake … and for y’alls ‘cause that was her way of paying back – or paying forward – what she saw as your … er … choosing her, choosing to spend your time on her. She just forgot the reason you chose wasn’t personal, but was just your job.”
I heard Chief Jackson grump, “Damn lot of complicated nonsense.”
“Girls are like that Chief. And young girls are like that a whole lot. You can’t just play with ‘em and get a kick out of watching them act happy then expect ‘em to not be sad when you leave ‘em in the pound when you pick another pet to take home. They don’t know you’re just being nice and it ain’t real serious. They don’t know you don’t really want a pet, you’re just there for a temporary fix or to fill out some volunteer hours to make yourself feel good.”
In a forbidding voice Chief Delray said, “Girls are not strays from the pound.”
“Pretty much my point Chief,” Cooper responded. “None of us are. Just some of us been in the pound and know the score. Doe … as rough as she’d had it, she hadn’t figured it out yet, and the way she learned the truth hurt a hella lot more than it needed to.”
I heard some footsteps and a male voice said, “I’ve finished reviewing the scans. The kidney is moderately bruised. I would have prescribed bed rest for a few days but there is no internal bleeding. It’s her lungs.”
The Nurse Gilroy said, “Doctor Patel, she had her monthly physical two weeks ago. There were no abnormalities detected.”
“The girl was born with a severe craniofacial cleft. She had subpar medical care until she was adopted at two years of age. I won’t go into all the surgical procedures it took to repair the defect but suffice it to say it was extensive. She spent a lot of time on and off a vent as a child. It is not unusual for her to be susceptible to airborne bacteria and virii. I heartedly approve of the regimen of supplements she is on, perhaps increasing the Vitamin D while she is nursing. Now as to what she has it is atypical pneumonia. Unfortunately, it appears to be due to Mycoplasma Pneumoniae.”
Chief Jackson asked, “What the hell is that?”
Cooper surprised everyone by saying, “Walking pneumonia of the worst kind ‘cause the normal antibiotics don’t treat it. There’s some stuff the military developed when that crap started running rampant in the med wards, but I don’t know how easy it is to get. Maybe get Dallas on it. He used to have connections.”
“Mr. … uh … Dallas’ connections are not necessary. That particular bacteria has begun to run rampant in civilian populations as well. I’ve already ordered some in and it is on the way. Fortunately, it does not appear that the baby has been infected.” There was an awkward silence then the doctor said, “Allow … Trainee Trahern … to continue to hold the baby until he can be put down and remain calm.”
I heard a rudely muttered, “The kid or Trahern?” The voice belonged to one of the hospital staff that I barely tolerated, and the feeling was mutual. Just thinking of that guy I started finding my fight. Then I heard some wheels rolling across the floor and jumped when someone touched me.
“’S okay. Sleep. Best medicine. Bams … here. Can … can I …”
For some weird reason I made the sign for duck. Bam-Bam must have seen it because he started saying “Kack, kack, kack. Kack, kack, kack.” Then I heard him making the sound he made when he was loving on his wubbie.
But that’s about all I had left in me for a while.
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Thank you 
Jeepcats27
Senior Member
thank you!
Sammy55
Veteran Member
Thank, Kathy! I hope that they can get Doe up and healthy again so that she and BamBam stay together and that their life goes on. But I fear for what kind of mental, emotional, and social life Doe will have if she can't trust people and learn to let people help her. I know she's been hurt, but she has to recognize that no (wo)man is an island. She can't do everything alone.
CHAPTER 30-1
“Doesn’t seem like a week is enough time.”
I told Jan, “Week and a half. And they’re only letting me out of the Clinic. I’ve got another week before they’ll even consider letting me get back to things all the way. They were even talking about holding me back a semester.”
“Uh uh,” she said with disbelief and shock.
“Yeah, but this isn’t elementary school, so I pass or washout on the same rules that everyone else has. Getting sick isn’t an excuse. Maybe these uniforms mean something ‘cause they’re brown. Maybe not.” I stopped talking and really wanted her to leave ‘cause I knew what was coming. They’d all tried it at least once.
“Uh … you up to talking?”
“I don’t want to talk about it. It is what it is. Thanks for bringing the new uniforms. The ones I was supposed to wear were too big.”
“You lost a lot of weight.” When I didn’t respond she sighed. “We didn’t mean any harm. You … you do know that right?”
“I got it already. I misread things. Look, I appreciate not having to walk over to supplies but I need to get back to filling out these forms so I can check out and get to my room.”
“Uh … sure. Look …”
“I don’t need babysitting. I’m over it. And I have a dumpster full of coursework to catch up on.”
“You’re not supposed to tax yourself.”
“Living is taxing; so what’s some bookwork between me and the headstone?”
I picked up the bag she’d brought and walked towards the clinic bathroom to change out of the stupid hospital gown I’d been living in for far too long. I was changed and almost back to my room, pushing Bam-Bam in a rolling highchair, when I heard two people arguing quietly.
“I keep trying to tell y’all that what you want ain’t gonna be what happens.”
“But she’s letting Chay come by and play with the kid.”
“She ain’t got much choice right now. He’s the only one the kid tolerates for long. And you notice she ain’t exactly talking his ear off like she used to. She mostly just watches for a sec to make sure he means it. Every time. Like she is reevaluating the circumstances to see if she can give in and sleep.”
“Chay don’t deserve that.”
“Sure he does. We all do. We screwed up big time any way you want to measure it. And it sucks, but better she learn she can’t trust people the way she used to or the world will chew her up and spit her out … and her kid too.”
“Is that how you feel?”
“You telling me that’s not how you feel?”
“But … is that how you feel about me?”
Like it was an old argument Cooper sighed and said, “Please don’t make this harder than it already is Jan. We can’t do anything about whatever this is between us and if I were to try you should be wondering if you could trust me, not the other way around, because it is an issue of security and safety for you and Jen. Now stop before she comes back, she don’t need this on top of the rest.”
“You think the Judge will really wash her out ‘cause of this?”
“Shh. We only accidentally know that stuff. Just drop it before someone hears.”
My chest got really tight and I backed up a couple of steps and let the cough out. Cooper was suddenly there and helping me to sit down. “I’ll get Nurse Gilroy.”
“No.”
“You sound three years old and not wantin’ to eat anything green.”
“I’m fine. Just some junk broke loose. Dr. Patel said that was a good sign. I just need some water to wash the taste out of my mouth.”
They finally left and I suppose I should have told them I already knew but I didn’t need to see them feeling sorry for me. Maybe I was hiding behind a pseudo-innocence but that doesn’t mean that I was blind to reality. Not to mention, the Judge doesn’t care who hears him and who doesn’t and the ventilation system in the Clinic conducted sound almost as well as a speaker did. It was my life, my business, not theirs.
I escaped but instead of heading to the dining hall like I’d been told, Chief Jackson’s newest gopher found me and gave me a note. “Guidance meeting, Same place, now.”
For the last three days they’d had me working on my lungs blowing on this thingamabob and by the time I got to the bench I felt like I did after blowing on that stupid thing for the prescribed time.
“You look like shit Trainee.”
“I’m sure I do,” I answered politely.
He sighed then said, “Sit down before you fall down.”
I did as asked and then remained silent but polite. When he opened his mouth I asked, “Am I being washed out?”
“How in the hell …?!” he asked as closed to shocked as I’d ever heard him.
“The Judge’s voice carries even better than Nurse Gilroy’s through the Clinical ventilation system. I’d just like to know because if I am, I need to try and make plans.”
He shook his head. “This wasn’t supposed to be what this conversation was about.”
“Maybe not Sir, but better to put the cards on the table and not waste either of our time.”
He jerked his head and I followed him into his office and then sat when he pointed to the chair on the other side of his desk.
He sat and steepled his fingers like he was trying to figure out what to say or how to say it. I left him to it. I wasn’t going to beg. “I’ll be honest McCormick, I wasn’t happy when you got dumped in my lap. But surprise, surprise you held your own … for the most part … and learned a hell of a lot quicker than anyone thought you would. The kid didn’t really slow you down, so he just became part of the scenery.”
“But …”
“But people have been talking.”
“Not that stupid fraternization crap,” I said more than a little irritated at the idea.
“Surprisingly no.”
“That I’m not really holding my own? That someone is covering for me?”
“That’s one thing that is being said.”
I shook my head. “Guessing is stupid, just tell me and I’ll deal.”
“Certain agents that have … let’s say they have a different philosophy than what The Farm stands for.”
“So? They aren’t paying my way, I’m earning it.”
“And that’s part of it. They think … hell, they think we are running a slave labor camp and they are using you as one of their examples.”
“What a load of BS. I mean this isn’t a vacation resort, but it isn’t a gulag … well except for that detention hall but I’ve heard worse coming out of some of the Boot Camps where they send troubled teens and the workhouses they used to turn the prisons into to build cheap green energy components. When I was little. Dad really had a hate on for those places because he said it gave law enforcement a bad name … and some of ‘em deserved it.”
“Your politics are showing Trainee.”
“I’m too young to have ‘politics’ according to most people. And even if I did what’s that got to do with the price of tea in China. Seriously. The Farm just happens to be the opportunity that came my way. But I guess what you’re saying is that I’ve become an embarrassment.”
That’s when he pulled out that egg-shaped device that I hadn’t seen since the first three-on-one meeting in the beginning.
He turned it on and said, “In a word, yes. But not to The Farm but to the Judge himself.”
“What did I ever do to him?”
“Nothing. Not really. You bucked command but you aren’t the first and if The Farm stays in operation you won’t be the last. What was noticed was that his reaction to the situation was … exaggerated. Worse, his exaggerated response was witnessed by outsiders and couldn’t be covered up.”
“Why cover it up if he isn’t ashamed of it?”
“Interesting question ain’t it? What none of us knew until the monthly reports came out was that he’d gone to bookkeeping and had them penalize you for the entire sum in your account. That was definitely not SOP. Usually those kinds of penalties have to be approved in Committee and has previously only been a percentage and not the entire sum, regardless of the amount. We also found out he went to Clancy and made your academic penalties harsher as well.”
Adding the facts to those I already had in my possession I asked, “He was trying to break me?”
“Eh …”
“Ree-Ree tried the same crap. So did the counselors that tried to force me to abort Bam-Bam before the judge in Family Court put me under someone else’s thumb. I just got lucky that the guardian ad litem … look that’s old news and irrelevant these days. It’s not like what was happening wasn’t obvious but I’m sorry I … er … spread the blame around. You were doing your job. But the Judge apparently has his own ideas how his extra special cases are supposed to work. He got mad because I wasn’t near as dumb or grateful to him personally as he thought I should be.”
“You’ve given this some thought.”
I shrugged. “Not like it was a mystery. All the tallies add up. But I’m not sure that it really matters. Judge is top of the food chain around here. Is he going to wash me out or what?”
“Well as to being ‘top of the food chain,’ he is, and he isn’t. Yes, he is the public face of The Farm and normally people don’t question the authority he wields. However, Chief Haygood was discussing the situation with his wife who from what I understand discussed it with some of the other family members and there was a meeting and the quorum didn’t go the Judge’s way as is normally the case. There are some things they won’t do … you won’t get back the credits you earned. But it is up to you whether you continue with the actual ... whatever the hell you called what you were doing … it is no longer required. On that note however, you might be interested to hear that Chief Lark has reported that with your stuff no longer showing up in the thrift store sales have significantly dropped. The Foundation is not happy about one of their primary fundraising ventures failing that way and over something like this.”
“Do I earn credits for the work or would I be working for free?”
“You’d earn the same amount as you did before.”
“What are the other buts I hear that you haven’t said yet?”
“You’re to have the choice to stay in the class or be moved to Chief Lark full time.”
“And your preference for that?”
“Excuse me?”
“Chief, let’s be real. You said you never wanted me and …”
“Correction, I said in the beginning.”
“If I stay the Judge is going to hassle you, he seems the type.”
“That is a possibility.”
“Can he fire you?”
“No. I have a contract.”
“Contracts can be broken.”
“That they can. But considering I’m married to the Judge’s baby sister, and she definitely has a say in things in the Foundation, it wouldn’t be too comfortable at Sunday family dinners for him to push that button too hard.”
“Oh.”
“Yes. ‘Oh.’ But I don’t want that getting around because I don’t want to be considered a kept man.”
“Sure. I can do that … or not do that I mean. Sir.” I had a hard time envisioning Chief Jackson married at all, the fact that he was married to a Haygood was just weird on top of weird.
He chuckled like he knew exactly what I was thinking. “But beyond that, whether you stay or move to a different program you will remain in the entrepreneurial track. Chief Haygood showed your original fundraising idea and there were plans to do it until the gossip started about slave labor.”
“O … kay.”
“On the other hand, girl you better be watching your p’s and q’s from here on out. No getting in fights … and before you open your mouth, I know your recent injury wasn’t your fault and neither was your illness. But life ain’t fair and people think what they want to. Next. Grades stay top notch, and part of that is if you do agree to make stuff for the thrift store, then same quality as before; no screwing things up to make The Farm look bad.”
“As if. I do have some pride you know. Not to mention my parents would not tolerate that kind of stupid were they still around, and in their honor I won’t do it just because they aren’t.”
“Figured so but it was in the stipulations.”
“Stipulations … plural.”
“Caught that did you? So grades, performance, and honesty. The next part is going to stick in your craw. You need to progress in your social interactions.”
“You’re kidding.”
“Nope.”
“What do they consider progressing? I already go to all the activities that Chief Delray sets up.”
“You need to stop being a damn ice queen.”
“Ice queen?!”
“McCormick, you know what I’m talking about.”
Trying not to blow the shot that I still needed for Bam-Bam and I, I finally managed to growl, “I will not be fake. I will not pretend.”
“Then don’t. But cut the men a break. They feel bad. And yeah, I know that is unfair.”
“They’re grown men, not boys. They can get over it or not. I’m not some stupid toy for them to play with to make themselves feeeeeel better. I’ll have a reasonable working relation with them. No more. No less. Unless they irritate me and then all bets are off, and I dump them on their heads during jujitsu.”
CHAPTER 30-2
He snorted. “That I’d like to see. Of the three Cooper is the most realistic and willing to accept a new status quo; however, Dallas thinks all it is going to take is time and Trahern … he’s gotten aggressive and distant, even for him. We need you back into the mix to knock his rough edges off if for no other reason than that.”
“And when our sentence is over with at The Farm? What then? It’s not like we’ll be going the same direction.”
“Hopefully by then Trahern will have taken the next leap in his development. If not … it will impact his placement.”
Getting angry and trying not to show it I said, “You’re guilting me into staying in the unit.”
“Since that appears to be what it is going to take,” he said like he was disappointed. “Yes, call it that if it makes your choice easier. But you are serving a purpose.”
“And with the newbs too?”
“Them I’d leave down a mineshaft if I could get away with it. They’re being stupid on purpose.”
“So wash ‘em out.”
He looked out the window and a weirdly out of place piece of puzzle was added to the table. I asked, “You can’t? But … if they’re not following the rules …”
“It turns out that the Judge owed a few favors and they’re being called in … suspiciously called in all at the same time. Some of us think that is what has him acting stiffer and harder than he normally does on some people.”
“Okay that’s definitely above my paygrade and none of my freaking business.”
“Might turn out that way.”
“Huh?”
“Let’s just say follow the rules or else. And, for whatever reason if one of those debts getting called in is to take you out …”
“Okay, I get it. All you can tell me is this is the way it is right now and my part in keeping it that way. But, you can’t guarantee a change you don’t have any control over. I’ll just start preparing for just in case. But I don’t know anyone important enough to warrant that kind of attention. You aren’t talking about Mari Johnson’s connections are you?”
“No. Her family has chosen to off-load her as a liability and if she isn’t marketable after her stay here, she’ll be sent someplace out of sight and out of mind. Trainee Johnson is … deteriorating. She’s lives more in fantasy than reality.”
Having come to a better understanding of Mari over the last few weeks I told him, “She just has a different worldview than most of the people around here. Granted, she’s a little weird. And might have a personality disorder that she’s being medicated for. But I wouldn’t say she is deteriorating exactly. She’s just having a serious adjustment reaction to the truths that she’d been taught as a kid not being quite what she was led to believe.” I shook my head. “So if not her connections the only other one I can think of would be the lawyer and Trahern’s ex.”
“That’s possibly where some of it is coming from … but more collaterally than directly.”
“I give up. Do you know?”
“You know anyone named Leonid?”
The name surprised me so much I started laughing and almost couldn’t stop. My brain was on overload.
“What is your problem McCormick?” the man asked both irritated and alarmed.
“That’s the name of the guy who killed my dad. You telling me, with your face hanging out, that some old Russian guy three-quarters eat up with colon cancer last I heard is out to get me? Didn’t killing my dad screw up my life enough?! How would he even know where I am?! There’s got to be some mistake. This is too much like a script for a bad movie.”
“Does don’t it,” he agreed. “You sure that’s the man’s name?”
“Was his name. He wasn’t exactly what you would call young and then to get sick like that his treatment would have been triaged when he went to prison. And he did go to prison, he was a three-striker. It was all over the news because people were freaking they’d send such an old guy to a maximum security location. If he isn’t dead by now, he’s gotta be a miracle survivor.”
“I’ll look into it.”
“Well start your looking in that max security federal penitentiary in Miami that got flattened during the storm. Maybe they accounted for all the bodies they pulled out of the rubble and maybe they didn’t.”
I heard him mutter, “Cold blooded little firecracker.”
“What? You expect me to wear sack cloth and ashes and morn what I hope was a painful end? Not likely. I forgave him just to keep myself from going crazy with hatred … Mom insisted we both do it … but the man is who he was. Live by the sword, die by the sword. And if it isn’t a sword it’s going to be something just as painful ‘cause that life he chose caught up with him.” I shook my head. “Uh uh. Someone is just playing a game. Is it you yanking my chain?”
“No Trainee it is not.” Out of left field he asked, “Do you have a trust fund?”
“No clue Sir. My guardian ad litem is definitely dead. Her daughter was pretty sure her uncle, the lawyer that set up the trust, was dead. At the very least he was one of the missing last I heard right before coming here and knowing the man, he would have come to find me if he’d still been around, if for no other reason than to put his stamp of approval on things. No telling if the original records of the Trust survived all the flooding.” I didn’t tell him I had certified copies of those documents. “And whatever the trust fund was invested in could be toast too. My survivor benefits from social security end late this summer when I turn eighteen. Bam-Bam doesn’t get anything from Bob because Bob’s parental rights were stripped in lieu of me suing the family; and I’m sure Ree-Ree has that sewed up by now anyway. There might be something there somewhere, but it still doesn’t mean anything to me right now because I wasn’t going to see any of the principle until I was 25 or 30 years old, depending on the court’s decision when the fund was set to mature the first time.”
“So you aren’t rich.”
“Oh, I lord it over the Church Mice on occasion, but I try and not let it go to my head too much.”
He chuckled. “Fine. I like to cover all bases and that was information we didn’t have when you came on board.”
“I don’t know why you wouldn’t have. It’s not exactly like a state secret and should have been in the packet that the law firm that hooked me into the program sent along. It’s probably even in public records. But someone must know something because that’s what that portion was on my monthly benefit report was.”
He got a strange look on his face then asked, “How did you get into The Farm?”
“No clue. The only thing I was told is that it was one of the options the lawyer was investigating for when my time ran out at the half-way house. I didn’t really have time to ask questions.”
“Hmmm.” He looked like he was thinking and then shook his head to clear it. “I’d give you time if it was me but it’s not up to me. The family wants the situation rectified and the embarrassment to come to a close. Are you in or out?”
I sighed. “Not like I have a lot of choice.”
“You have a choice, told you that already.”
“You also guilted me with two tons of crap.”
“Yes I did,” he said with a slightly evil grin. “But that doesn’t mean you don’t have a choice.”
So I stayed in unit. I still refused to call it a crew. And I still didn’t plan on getting blindsided again. But I did agree to “appropriately socialize.” I also decided that I would continue making re-fashions for the thrift store … but I wouldn’t count on the credits being what they should be, if anything at all beyond something to put on the resume. Not only did I now not trust anyone, but I had reason to be suspicious as well. And in the back of my mind, I continued to plan for just in case.
He snorted. “That I’d like to see. Of the three Cooper is the most realistic and willing to accept a new status quo; however, Dallas thinks all it is going to take is time and Trahern … he’s gotten aggressive and distant, even for him. We need you back into the mix to knock his rough edges off if for no other reason than that.”
“And when our sentence is over with at The Farm? What then? It’s not like we’ll be going the same direction.”
“Hopefully by then Trahern will have taken the next leap in his development. If not … it will impact his placement.”
Getting angry and trying not to show it I said, “You’re guilting me into staying in the unit.”
“Since that appears to be what it is going to take,” he said like he was disappointed. “Yes, call it that if it makes your choice easier. But you are serving a purpose.”
“And with the newbs too?”
“Them I’d leave down a mineshaft if I could get away with it. They’re being stupid on purpose.”
“So wash ‘em out.”
He looked out the window and a weirdly out of place piece of puzzle was added to the table. I asked, “You can’t? But … if they’re not following the rules …”
“It turns out that the Judge owed a few favors and they’re being called in … suspiciously called in all at the same time. Some of us think that is what has him acting stiffer and harder than he normally does on some people.”
“Okay that’s definitely above my paygrade and none of my freaking business.”
“Might turn out that way.”
“Huh?”
“Let’s just say follow the rules or else. And, for whatever reason if one of those debts getting called in is to take you out …”
“Okay, I get it. All you can tell me is this is the way it is right now and my part in keeping it that way. But, you can’t guarantee a change you don’t have any control over. I’ll just start preparing for just in case. But I don’t know anyone important enough to warrant that kind of attention. You aren’t talking about Mari Johnson’s connections are you?”
“No. Her family has chosen to off-load her as a liability and if she isn’t marketable after her stay here, she’ll be sent someplace out of sight and out of mind. Trainee Johnson is … deteriorating. She’s lives more in fantasy than reality.”
Having come to a better understanding of Mari over the last few weeks I told him, “She just has a different worldview than most of the people around here. Granted, she’s a little weird. And might have a personality disorder that she’s being medicated for. But I wouldn’t say she is deteriorating exactly. She’s just having a serious adjustment reaction to the truths that she’d been taught as a kid not being quite what she was led to believe.” I shook my head. “So if not her connections the only other one I can think of would be the lawyer and Trahern’s ex.”
“That’s possibly where some of it is coming from … but more collaterally than directly.”
“I give up. Do you know?”
“You know anyone named Leonid?”
The name surprised me so much I started laughing and almost couldn’t stop. My brain was on overload.
“What is your problem McCormick?” the man asked both irritated and alarmed.
“That’s the name of the guy who killed my dad. You telling me, with your face hanging out, that some old Russian guy three-quarters eat up with colon cancer last I heard is out to get me? Didn’t killing my dad screw up my life enough?! How would he even know where I am?! There’s got to be some mistake. This is too much like a script for a bad movie.”
“Does don’t it,” he agreed. “You sure that’s the man’s name?”
“Was his name. He wasn’t exactly what you would call young and then to get sick like that his treatment would have been triaged when he went to prison. And he did go to prison, he was a three-striker. It was all over the news because people were freaking they’d send such an old guy to a maximum security location. If he isn’t dead by now, he’s gotta be a miracle survivor.”
“I’ll look into it.”
“Well start your looking in that max security federal penitentiary in Miami that got flattened during the storm. Maybe they accounted for all the bodies they pulled out of the rubble and maybe they didn’t.”
I heard him mutter, “Cold blooded little firecracker.”
“What? You expect me to wear sack cloth and ashes and morn what I hope was a painful end? Not likely. I forgave him just to keep myself from going crazy with hatred … Mom insisted we both do it … but the man is who he was. Live by the sword, die by the sword. And if it isn’t a sword it’s going to be something just as painful ‘cause that life he chose caught up with him.” I shook my head. “Uh uh. Someone is just playing a game. Is it you yanking my chain?”
“No Trainee it is not.” Out of left field he asked, “Do you have a trust fund?”
“No clue Sir. My guardian ad litem is definitely dead. Her daughter was pretty sure her uncle, the lawyer that set up the trust, was dead. At the very least he was one of the missing last I heard right before coming here and knowing the man, he would have come to find me if he’d still been around, if for no other reason than to put his stamp of approval on things. No telling if the original records of the Trust survived all the flooding.” I didn’t tell him I had certified copies of those documents. “And whatever the trust fund was invested in could be toast too. My survivor benefits from social security end late this summer when I turn eighteen. Bam-Bam doesn’t get anything from Bob because Bob’s parental rights were stripped in lieu of me suing the family; and I’m sure Ree-Ree has that sewed up by now anyway. There might be something there somewhere, but it still doesn’t mean anything to me right now because I wasn’t going to see any of the principle until I was 25 or 30 years old, depending on the court’s decision when the fund was set to mature the first time.”
“So you aren’t rich.”
“Oh, I lord it over the Church Mice on occasion, but I try and not let it go to my head too much.”
He chuckled. “Fine. I like to cover all bases and that was information we didn’t have when you came on board.”
“I don’t know why you wouldn’t have. It’s not exactly like a state secret and should have been in the packet that the law firm that hooked me into the program sent along. It’s probably even in public records. But someone must know something because that’s what that portion was on my monthly benefit report was.”
He got a strange look on his face then asked, “How did you get into The Farm?”
“No clue. The only thing I was told is that it was one of the options the lawyer was investigating for when my time ran out at the half-way house. I didn’t really have time to ask questions.”
“Hmmm.” He looked like he was thinking and then shook his head to clear it. “I’d give you time if it was me but it’s not up to me. The family wants the situation rectified and the embarrassment to come to a close. Are you in or out?”
I sighed. “Not like I have a lot of choice.”
“You have a choice, told you that already.”
“You also guilted me with two tons of crap.”
“Yes I did,” he said with a slightly evil grin. “But that doesn’t mean you don’t have a choice.”
So I stayed in unit. I still refused to call it a crew. And I still didn’t plan on getting blindsided again. But I did agree to “appropriately socialize.” I also decided that I would continue making re-fashions for the thrift store … but I wouldn’t count on the credits being what they should be, if anything at all beyond something to put on the resume. Not only did I now not trust anyone, but I had reason to be suspicious as well. And in the back of my mind, I continued to plan for just in case.
CHAPTER 31-1
April and the first part of May were lost to me. I was beginning to wonder if I would wash out because I couldn’t catch up but after one really rough day my perspective changed; or, at least the angle was less acute. I didn’t necessarily go back to the trust level that I had before, but at least I didn’t feel quite as big of a fool as I had been feeling.
I just barely made it back to my room before Bam-Bam ate me alive. He acted like he was starving and I realized he’d gotten used to feeling fuller from the formula they’d been forced to feed him while I was too sick to nurse. My milk wasn’t coming back the way it was before. I guess it was thinner and less nutritious because my body had used up so much to fuel during my recovery. There also didn’t seem to be as much of it. I’d known the day was coming that he wouldn’t need me that way quite as much, but I thought I had more time. Unfortunately, time was a commodity that seemed to be slipping away faster than I could find it to save or use.
I sniffled my way through some Mommy-tears as I fed him another container of baby food. He was nine months old and crawling like a steam roller. He could also pull himself up and had even tried to take a few steps, but he always wound up flopping down on his butt. The first time or two he did it scared me but then I realized he thought it was a very cool thing to be able to do. When I told Nurse Gilroy she got all excited and said that while it wasn’t unheard of for a baby to walk at nine months he was certainly above the curve. She said it like she’d had a personal hand in his development and I suppose, to give the woman some credit, she had.
But that night I wished he’d slow down just a little. I missed the little lump that he used to be, all snug in the sling and content to go wherever I did knowing that I’d take care of him, when he was still more part of me than his own individual. At nine months he was turning into a demanding … and heavy … love bug. Ever since the first day I’d been so sick and Chay had come to give a hand with him, Bam-Bam had started to recognize and identify Chay in a more serious and intentional way. Now he couldn’t be pacified into something else if it was Chay he wanted. Lord help if you got between him and his Wubbie Duck, the teeth turned into bandsaws. And when he wanted to eat you better be prepared to shovel it in. But that didn’t always mean he was very clean when I managed to fill his tank. That night was no exception.
“Laundry is so interesting with you, you know that?” I told him as I wiped creamed peas off of my face. “And the clothes aren’t the only thing needing a bath Little Mister.”
Bam-Bam laughed. I was beginning to think his future was as a comedian, heavy on the slapstick variety. I was taking off his sweater – it was now too warm for a coat – and heard something clink as it dropped. Wondering what it was, and praying it wasn’t a snap that I’d have to replace, I bent down and saw a memory tab. I turned it over and over in my hand for a moment then got out the ubernet cube and dropped it in. There was a document on it that was named “homework” and while it probably wasn’t that smart, I knew the ubernet cube had the steeltrap virus protection program to protect it. I wanted to know who the memory chip belonged to. When the document finally opened you could have knocked me over with a feather.
-------------------------------------
Don’t get mad. I put this where Bam-Bam couldn’t get it and put it in his mouth, but you’ll find it when you take his sweater off. What I have to say would take more words than I can get out so I’m writing it down so at least you know my side. It might not be the kind of thing to say aloud anyway.
I’m sorry. I should have known that the first thing you would think of was Rolly, then me. The way you are with Bam-Bam taught me that, but I wasn’t thinking too well then. It was like being in the middle of one of my episodes. There are still days I am so angry at what has happened, and then angry at myself for letting some of it happen, that it is hard to do much more than put one foot in front of the other. I’m sorry you had to learn things the way you did. There is just no good way to explain it that makes it sound nice or that doesn’t make us sound like we are making excuses. I can say that no one meant any harm. But there are also things you think you know that you don’t. Those things are things I can’t say. Not here. Not now. For too many reasons.
No. I haven’t snorted dream dust. No. This isn’t to get you in trouble or trick you or trap you. That’s what I would be thinking in your shoes but that’s not the way it is. Add to that I don’t want to get in trouble, don’t want either one of us in trouble. I’ve encrypted this so no one else can read it, even if they try and scan your tablet. All they’ll see are notes and diagrams. At one time I was tops in my Communications job; ironic if you think about it, but I still know how to do a few things. If you toggle the translate switch you’ll see what I mean. It’s up to you. I’m giving you that opt out if I’m creeping you out. If you report me I’ll understand, but I’m hoping that you don’t.
I found out that Rolly is doing okay. I know the guy that is his real father from tech school. He said it was just a one-night stand when they both got drunk at his sister’s enlistment party and I don’t have any reason not to believe him. He also told me a few things I couldn’t or wouldn’t hear from the other people that had tried to tell me back then. She was into the VR scene when I met her, but it wasn’t a problem, I’m sure of that. I don’t know when she became a VR addict, but it might have been during my first tour when she had to spend so much time alone in the small base housing apartment they allotted us and her parents were so bent out of shape and weren’t talking to her for a while. It wasn’t my fault. I’m convinced I did what I could and what she ultimately did, she chose of her own free will. I don’t hate her, but I am still angry at her so don’t ask me about it. Just, if you’d been wondering I wanted you to know that Rolly is finally getting taken care of by people that really love him and aren’t out to use him. His grandparents and other family are good people and were always nice to me. On the one hand they are really happy about the surprise of having a kid in the family. On the other, they say they are sorry for how things have happened and if I want to keep up with how Rolly is doing they are more than willing for it to be that way. I think I’d like that.
I also want things to be like we talked about once. That when we got away from The Farm that we find some way to talk. I don’t know how to say some of what I’m thinking because it sounds really stupid and dangerous even in my head, and time could change things because you are so damn young and I don’t want a repeat like I had with my ex, so I’ll just leave it at that.
For now, I want you to know that I’m glad you stayed. Cooper explained things to Dallas and I. We understand. Mostly. We know we need you in the team. That’s not easy to admit, even with Chief Jackson poking at us and pointing it out. Maybe you can let yourself need us too, even if it is just a little bit at a time. It’s your call and I won’t force you. We each have things to learn from the other. It will take time to work out the issues, but I will do my part and what follows is part of it.
I know you are having a hard time making up the work you missed. You were so tired during morning practice you even let one of the newbs take you down. That shouldn’t have happened; you are better than that. Chief Jackson making you sit out the rest of practice made you mad, but I could see you were relieved too. That worried me. Then Cooper, who checks over everyone’s med chart as part of his training assignments, said that he overheard Nurse Gilroy discussing things with Chief Delray and that she said she didn’t have the authority to adjust your schedule even if another Chief requested it; she’d been specifically locked out of doing that for you. They were both wondering whether you would be able to catch up. What I’m about to tell you is something important you need to accept. There’s things going on you don’t know, all I can say is you need to catch up or you won’t be able to be part of the team anymore and while there might come a time we won’t need you, that time hasn’t come yet. And there might come a time when you don’t need us, I’m not sure you do now anyway, but please, it’s important. I’m not asking you to do it all by yourself and maybe this is a way for you to let yourself need us … me … a little.
I went over all our survival assignments since April, big group and small, and put together an outline for you to study from. I’ve also put in some stuff that I knew from my previous training and when I was growing up on my brother’s land. In shop tomorrow I’ll make you some hooks to go in the fishing kit we made with the Chief. On the hikes the others and I will teach you the things that the Chief showed us that you missed. I wish I could help with the other things but I’m barely keeping up myself. The math makes my head want to fall off and roll away. Why the hell am I ever going to need to know some of the things they want me to know is beyond me. I’m pretty sure that linear equations were created by someone with way too much time on their hands. I think they are crazy; but, we all have to do what we have to do. And this is me helping you to do what you have to as much as I can.
Just let me know tomorrow that you found this and that it is okay that I help. I haven’t told Cooper or Dallas or the Chief. This is just between us. It is no one else’s business.
C
------------------------------------------
I sat there looking at the note long enough that Bam-Bam got tired and wanted to be held and rocked to sleep. The whole thing made me suspicious but another part of me wanted to believe him. Being totally alone in life is tiring and there were already so many things making me tired. After all the emotions I’d been feeling I wasn’t sure I trusted what I was reading. But when I looked at the outline he’d made I got so choked up that I squeezed Bam-Bam and he squawked in complaint. Here were all the little notes and points I would have made had I been to the classes myself. And somehow, he’d gotten pictures of the plants and the various parts that had been studied and how to use them and dropped them into the document like it was a type of textbook all its own. And even stranger, at least I thought so for a guy, there were recipes for using those parts.
I decided I was simply too tired and confused to worry at it. I’d have to see what I’d see and then decide what I was going to do with it. First off, I wasn’t touching some of what he wrote with a ten-foot pole. Whether I was misreading it or not, I wasn’t ready or willing to go down such a path. Second, I could guess he was worried that I was going to wash out but wasn’t willing to tell me about the Judge and didn’t think I knew. That told me – assuming it wasn’t all a game – that Chief Jackson hadn’t spoken to them about telling me and didn’t know that I’d overheard it all myself from the horse’s mouth. Whether it was a case of the right hand not knowing what the left hand was doing or not, I wasn’t going to be the one to inform everyone that the emperor had no clothes on. That’s a good way to get caught in a smash up.
Still, being tired was no excuse for not putting in some study time and since Bam-Bam had decided he was done and ready to sleep I put him in the “bed” I had made him in the grocery cart since he’d outgrown the bassinet a couple of months back. I gave the carrier to Chief Delray in case someone else down the road needed it and while she was surprised at first, she was also happy to have such a thing in stock for just in case.
I picked up Chay’s outline and saw that it was a combination of both April and May’s assignments up to that point. I was happy to have the April entries because I saw that they’d gotten more detailed about some of the plants and fungi, some of which was duplicated and being further detailed in May. I saw that Chief Jackson had taken the men fishing a few times and they’d had fresh trout for lunch. That I would have liked to have done. The one thing I missed since leaving Florida was all the seafood I used to eat. I also saw a note of complaint about the newbs not taking things seriously enough and how hacked off and “foul” it was making Chief Jackson. And when Chief Jackson wanted to get “foul” he could make a merchant seaman blush. I grumbled about missing bow-hunting turkey in April, but I missed more learning to make turkey jerky. We were assigned a hike the next day and one of the things we were supposed to cover was making a fish catching basket. It sounded interesting. If we did catch anything, I was going to ask the Chief if you can make fish jerky the same way you could make jerky out of other things.
CHAPTER 31-2
We were still eating ramps in the dining hall and it was giving a lot of the little kids stomach upsets, some of them so bad even the adult males would make a face and move away. I’m lucky that Bam-Bam seems to have developed my cast iron stomach. I don’t know what I would have done if he was a gassy baby. I hadn’t always been able to be very choosey when it comes to feeding my face so I can feed his.
I had been lucky to not miss the lesson on wild ginger early in April, but it looked like it was still on the tablet for May and if there was a chance to pick my own and store it for “just in case” I would do that. Despite Chay’s letter and help that I was more than willing to accept even if it turned out there were strings attached, I still wasn’t convinced that I wouldn’t be washed out anyway regardless of my performance. I still had things like rose hips and sumac drupes hidden away, but I felt it imperative to add to my hidden supplies.
One of the most lightweight things I could add would be the various mushrooms we were studying: yellow morels, dryad’s saddle, chicken of the woods, stone crop, and reishi were the ones for May. I would also snip, and dry, onion grass the way my mother used to do chives. I got a few strange looks from the newbs the few times they noticed what I was doing but no one actually said anything.
Something they had while I was in the clinic was bamboo and ramps rice cakes, but I didn’t miss them; it was one of the first solid foods I ate after my appetite came back. I had no idea bamboo could even grow in Georgia but apparently there are many different varieties of bamboo and they can grow most anyplace except in the Arctic and Antarctic regions and deep in the dessert unless it was at an oasis.
I’d been there for most of the flower lessons. Who knew that so many flowers were edible?! The ones that I’d been allowed to sample were red bud blooms, rose petals, elderflowers, lilac, wisteria, and black locust flowers. We made jellies and syrups that were sold beside the tree maple and birch syrups that were made in March. We also gathered and preserved the tiny wild strawberries that were so numerous in some area that they looked cultivated. I managed to save and dry a bag of those strawberries for my supplies, but it wasn’t easy, and I had the idea that had I been caught I would have been in trouble. Apparently those things are worth their weight in the specialty stores that The Farm sells stuff in.
The ever-present chickweed was a mainstay as it had been for months. And so were the nettle varieties, some of them “stinging” and some not. Other greens we learned about were greenbriar tips and spruce tips. I preferred the greenbriar tips for taste, but their appearance was a little too alien for me to sit and contemplate what I was eating when they were on the plate.
It wasn’t just wild forage, in large group we’d been learning about the onions and zucchini that was grown domestically right there on The Farm. I eventually had a supply of both in airtight bags in my own food box but only because of Chief Jackson’s slight of hand, allowing me to keep most everything we’d dried on the dehydrator we’d built out behind his office.
I learned the Chief’s wife travelled a lot … A LOT … but I did eventually see her, but I swear I needed eye bleach after catching them canoodling after I’d arrived for a guidance meeting a couple of minutes early.
Neither of them were the least bit embarrassed to have been caught “in flagrante delicto” though I was about ready to die.
Chief Jackson came around the building to find me pacing and wondering how to avoid admitting that I’d seen anything at all. He laughed at me and said, “Girl you act like you’ve never seen anyone kissing before.”
I was still trying to wipe the pictures out of my head and him having a good laugh at me wasn’t helping.
“Chief, I’ve seen people making out before. My parents made a habit out of it though not a spectacle. It is kind of hard to avoid seeing it when you go to public high school. And the stories that the girls at the halfway house told would probably make your hair stand on end. I’ve just never seen you making out before. Next time hang a do not disturb sign out. Please?”
He continued laughing and eventually my discomfort went away. The Chief was happy to have his wife home for a few days before she turned around and left again. That was a good thing. And from what I saw … shudder … she wasn’t exactly averse to seeing him either.
I wondered if this was another one of those not-for-public-consumption type pieces of information until the next day when I discovered that after jujitsu practice the four newbs were temporarily being moved to a tutoring block run by Chief Clancy – Mickey her primary apprentice/helper/gopher by then – until they caught up in the area of academics. Temporary was defined by Chief Jackson as “until they could keep their head out of their ass for more than five minutes at a time.” Alllllrighty then.
I was still tired and not feeling one hundred percent but somehow I felt a little lighter because of the previous evening’s discovery of Chay’s offer of help so when one of the newbs tried to pull the same thing they had the previous day I put them on their backside in a painful way. The Chief discouraged openly picking sides, but I could sense that he was both surprise and relieved that he didn’t have to take me out of the routine before the end of practice.
“McCormick?”
“Yes Sir?”
“Up to attending an extended large group activity?”
“Not up to me Sir. If that’s the assignment, then that’s what I will be doing after breakfast.”
“Very good. Make sure and bring an extra pair or two of socks in case your feet get wet.”
“Yes Sir.”
I turned and for the first time in a while was really hungry. I was going to run to the Clinic to get Bam-Bam’s next batch of food but Cooper stopped me by saying, “Nurse Gilroy said to tell you that she would like to try Bams on more natural food and the culinary staff will have a bowl waiting for you.”
“Uh oh.”
“What? You don’t think the kid will eat it?”
I snorted. “Eat it. Wear it. Try and make sure everyone else within throwing distance is wearing it.” I sighed. “I’d thought that if there was room at the table maybe we’d join you if it was okay but if I have to …”
“S’ okay,” Chay said. “Target practice.”
“With you as the target?”
He grinned and I saw from the corner of my eye the other two men look at each other and try and hide relieved grins.
Dallas said, “Hey, if I can avoid the flying pots and pans of my last girl, how much harder can it be with that squirt?”
I looked at Chay and watched him grin bigger but just shrug but I knew a naughty look when I saw one. “Don’t you guys. Whatever you are thinking. They’ll rack me with lost credits if he is marked wasting food and I can’t afford to lose anymore. Chief Jackson said there will be another opportunity to get something for BOB and I’m not sure I’ve got enough as it is.”
“What do you mean?” Dallas asked. “What about all them credits from that sewing you do?”
I said, “Stay out of it.”
But he put his hand on my arm and said, “Look. Don’t get all pruned up because …”
“Stop. It is what it is and for your own sake just stay out of it.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means I know what you guys know because I overheard it from the horse’s mouth … so to speak … because the horse talks really loud in a voice that carries. I’m not sure the horse didn’t mean it to be that way to spook me so add that to the sum total. It also means that there were penalties to go along with detention and all those credits I had earned up to then were part of it.” I was relieved to see the look of outrage on all three men’s faces but at the same time it worried me. “I’ve got to color inside the lines with zero mistakes and I don’t have a lot of colors to do it with so just … don’t make things more difficult. Okay?”
Chay nodded and patted Bam-Bam’s back so I knew he was in. Cooper looked concerned but nodded as well. When I got to Dallas I was surprised to see he was really angry.
“You know that is just shit. Part of my job was … acquisition … when someone in the diplomatic core wanted or needed something. I know maybe better than other people how valuable what you were …”
“Dallas. It’s done. It’s not getting undone. Time to move forward. Thanks for the understanding but … don’t turn this into something that could be a problem. There isn’t just us to think of. I may not really like the newbs but they’ve got some potential if they’d just change their goals to realistic … and legal. And then there is Chief Jackson. Don’t let him have to harvest any grief over this situation more than I suspect he already is.”
“You really okay with this?!” he asked in confused outrage.
Trying to explain and stay reasonable I answered, “I wouldn’t say I’m okay with it but … let’s be realistic, no one would be ‘okay’ with losing those kinds of credit. What I’m trying to do is find a way to deal with the reality. I’m saying I forgot the old saying a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. I made a mistake trusting those credits would be there; the reality is they’re more like a temptation. You familiar with the saying ‘owing your life to the company store’?”
“Yeah. Had an uncle whose people came from the coal mines of Kentucky.”
“Exactly. I heard from Chief Delray early on that I needed to be careful to control any temptation to overextend myself in that area. Seems a lot of trainees wind up owing The Farm for their care and upkeep rather that the other way around. And The Farm always collects, one way or the other. I only heard the literal meaning of her words at the time but I’m beginning to wonder if … I don’t know … there might be a deeper one than she meant. And I’m sure I’m in the hole for this cold and …”
Cooper said, “Pneumonia.”
I rolled my eyes. “I was sick and spent a week and a half in the clinic taking meds that didn’t come free. So I’ve got a lot of making up to do. All I’m asking is you guys not teach tricks to Bam-Bam. Please. He gets up to enough on his own.”
They agreed, each in their own way, but still I hadn’t liked the obstinate look on Dallas’ face. That didn’t bode well. I just hoped it didn’t also bode trouble.
We were still eating ramps in the dining hall and it was giving a lot of the little kids stomach upsets, some of them so bad even the adult males would make a face and move away. I’m lucky that Bam-Bam seems to have developed my cast iron stomach. I don’t know what I would have done if he was a gassy baby. I hadn’t always been able to be very choosey when it comes to feeding my face so I can feed his.
I had been lucky to not miss the lesson on wild ginger early in April, but it looked like it was still on the tablet for May and if there was a chance to pick my own and store it for “just in case” I would do that. Despite Chay’s letter and help that I was more than willing to accept even if it turned out there were strings attached, I still wasn’t convinced that I wouldn’t be washed out anyway regardless of my performance. I still had things like rose hips and sumac drupes hidden away, but I felt it imperative to add to my hidden supplies.
One of the most lightweight things I could add would be the various mushrooms we were studying: yellow morels, dryad’s saddle, chicken of the woods, stone crop, and reishi were the ones for May. I would also snip, and dry, onion grass the way my mother used to do chives. I got a few strange looks from the newbs the few times they noticed what I was doing but no one actually said anything.
Something they had while I was in the clinic was bamboo and ramps rice cakes, but I didn’t miss them; it was one of the first solid foods I ate after my appetite came back. I had no idea bamboo could even grow in Georgia but apparently there are many different varieties of bamboo and they can grow most anyplace except in the Arctic and Antarctic regions and deep in the dessert unless it was at an oasis.
I’d been there for most of the flower lessons. Who knew that so many flowers were edible?! The ones that I’d been allowed to sample were red bud blooms, rose petals, elderflowers, lilac, wisteria, and black locust flowers. We made jellies and syrups that were sold beside the tree maple and birch syrups that were made in March. We also gathered and preserved the tiny wild strawberries that were so numerous in some area that they looked cultivated. I managed to save and dry a bag of those strawberries for my supplies, but it wasn’t easy, and I had the idea that had I been caught I would have been in trouble. Apparently those things are worth their weight in the specialty stores that The Farm sells stuff in.
The ever-present chickweed was a mainstay as it had been for months. And so were the nettle varieties, some of them “stinging” and some not. Other greens we learned about were greenbriar tips and spruce tips. I preferred the greenbriar tips for taste, but their appearance was a little too alien for me to sit and contemplate what I was eating when they were on the plate.
It wasn’t just wild forage, in large group we’d been learning about the onions and zucchini that was grown domestically right there on The Farm. I eventually had a supply of both in airtight bags in my own food box but only because of Chief Jackson’s slight of hand, allowing me to keep most everything we’d dried on the dehydrator we’d built out behind his office.
I learned the Chief’s wife travelled a lot … A LOT … but I did eventually see her, but I swear I needed eye bleach after catching them canoodling after I’d arrived for a guidance meeting a couple of minutes early.
Neither of them were the least bit embarrassed to have been caught “in flagrante delicto” though I was about ready to die.
Chief Jackson came around the building to find me pacing and wondering how to avoid admitting that I’d seen anything at all. He laughed at me and said, “Girl you act like you’ve never seen anyone kissing before.”
I was still trying to wipe the pictures out of my head and him having a good laugh at me wasn’t helping.
“Chief, I’ve seen people making out before. My parents made a habit out of it though not a spectacle. It is kind of hard to avoid seeing it when you go to public high school. And the stories that the girls at the halfway house told would probably make your hair stand on end. I’ve just never seen you making out before. Next time hang a do not disturb sign out. Please?”
He continued laughing and eventually my discomfort went away. The Chief was happy to have his wife home for a few days before she turned around and left again. That was a good thing. And from what I saw … shudder … she wasn’t exactly averse to seeing him either.
I wondered if this was another one of those not-for-public-consumption type pieces of information until the next day when I discovered that after jujitsu practice the four newbs were temporarily being moved to a tutoring block run by Chief Clancy – Mickey her primary apprentice/helper/gopher by then – until they caught up in the area of academics. Temporary was defined by Chief Jackson as “until they could keep their head out of their ass for more than five minutes at a time.” Alllllrighty then.
I was still tired and not feeling one hundred percent but somehow I felt a little lighter because of the previous evening’s discovery of Chay’s offer of help so when one of the newbs tried to pull the same thing they had the previous day I put them on their backside in a painful way. The Chief discouraged openly picking sides, but I could sense that he was both surprise and relieved that he didn’t have to take me out of the routine before the end of practice.
“McCormick?”
“Yes Sir?”
“Up to attending an extended large group activity?”
“Not up to me Sir. If that’s the assignment, then that’s what I will be doing after breakfast.”
“Very good. Make sure and bring an extra pair or two of socks in case your feet get wet.”
“Yes Sir.”
I turned and for the first time in a while was really hungry. I was going to run to the Clinic to get Bam-Bam’s next batch of food but Cooper stopped me by saying, “Nurse Gilroy said to tell you that she would like to try Bams on more natural food and the culinary staff will have a bowl waiting for you.”
“Uh oh.”
“What? You don’t think the kid will eat it?”
I snorted. “Eat it. Wear it. Try and make sure everyone else within throwing distance is wearing it.” I sighed. “I’d thought that if there was room at the table maybe we’d join you if it was okay but if I have to …”
“S’ okay,” Chay said. “Target practice.”
“With you as the target?”
He grinned and I saw from the corner of my eye the other two men look at each other and try and hide relieved grins.
Dallas said, “Hey, if I can avoid the flying pots and pans of my last girl, how much harder can it be with that squirt?”
I looked at Chay and watched him grin bigger but just shrug but I knew a naughty look when I saw one. “Don’t you guys. Whatever you are thinking. They’ll rack me with lost credits if he is marked wasting food and I can’t afford to lose anymore. Chief Jackson said there will be another opportunity to get something for BOB and I’m not sure I’ve got enough as it is.”
“What do you mean?” Dallas asked. “What about all them credits from that sewing you do?”
I said, “Stay out of it.”
But he put his hand on my arm and said, “Look. Don’t get all pruned up because …”
“Stop. It is what it is and for your own sake just stay out of it.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“It means I know what you guys know because I overheard it from the horse’s mouth … so to speak … because the horse talks really loud in a voice that carries. I’m not sure the horse didn’t mean it to be that way to spook me so add that to the sum total. It also means that there were penalties to go along with detention and all those credits I had earned up to then were part of it.” I was relieved to see the look of outrage on all three men’s faces but at the same time it worried me. “I’ve got to color inside the lines with zero mistakes and I don’t have a lot of colors to do it with so just … don’t make things more difficult. Okay?”
Chay nodded and patted Bam-Bam’s back so I knew he was in. Cooper looked concerned but nodded as well. When I got to Dallas I was surprised to see he was really angry.
“You know that is just shit. Part of my job was … acquisition … when someone in the diplomatic core wanted or needed something. I know maybe better than other people how valuable what you were …”
“Dallas. It’s done. It’s not getting undone. Time to move forward. Thanks for the understanding but … don’t turn this into something that could be a problem. There isn’t just us to think of. I may not really like the newbs but they’ve got some potential if they’d just change their goals to realistic … and legal. And then there is Chief Jackson. Don’t let him have to harvest any grief over this situation more than I suspect he already is.”
“You really okay with this?!” he asked in confused outrage.
Trying to explain and stay reasonable I answered, “I wouldn’t say I’m okay with it but … let’s be realistic, no one would be ‘okay’ with losing those kinds of credit. What I’m trying to do is find a way to deal with the reality. I’m saying I forgot the old saying a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. I made a mistake trusting those credits would be there; the reality is they’re more like a temptation. You familiar with the saying ‘owing your life to the company store’?”
“Yeah. Had an uncle whose people came from the coal mines of Kentucky.”
“Exactly. I heard from Chief Delray early on that I needed to be careful to control any temptation to overextend myself in that area. Seems a lot of trainees wind up owing The Farm for their care and upkeep rather that the other way around. And The Farm always collects, one way or the other. I only heard the literal meaning of her words at the time but I’m beginning to wonder if … I don’t know … there might be a deeper one than she meant. And I’m sure I’m in the hole for this cold and …”
Cooper said, “Pneumonia.”
I rolled my eyes. “I was sick and spent a week and a half in the clinic taking meds that didn’t come free. So I’ve got a lot of making up to do. All I’m asking is you guys not teach tricks to Bam-Bam. Please. He gets up to enough on his own.”
They agreed, each in their own way, but still I hadn’t liked the obstinate look on Dallas’ face. That didn’t bode well. I just hoped it didn’t also bode trouble.
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Thank you for more.
larry_minn
Contributing Member
I am of two minds. I really want to read rest right now. But it’s kinda good to think on chapters before next cliff.
Thank you so much for sharing your talent with us, Kathy!!
larry_minn
Contributing Member
I used to wonder why friends would ask me to agree to be guardian if they got killed. Why not family. At one time I could have had 7 kids from 3 families if major disaster had killed all their parents.
CHAPTER 32 - 1
“All right Trainees, this is my wife. You disrespect her in any way, shape, or form and I will bury you here in the forest and no one will ever find you. Understand?”
He might have said it with a joking smile but none of us four were under any illusion that he wouldn’t follow through on the threat so all we said was, “Yes Sir, Chief.”
“Very good. Let’s practice those fishing skills.”
Hah. Turns out that Chief Jackson married his mini-me. Boy oh boy. It was like Chief Jackson was doubled and then been forced to fit inside a chihuahua. That said, the woman knew her stuff and I considered being her when I grew up if it meant being able to put that particular look on the guys’ faces. You know the one; it’s a cross between looking like a deer in the headlights and being hit in the face with a frozen fish.
It was she that instructed us in how to make what she called a “primitive funnel fish trap.” We used bamboo that had been cleared from around one of The Farm’s fallow fields that was being put back into production for the Summer. The bamboo formed the ribs of the basket. Next we cut thick, older kudzu vines to weave around the ribs. We wove two funnel shaped baskets where one would fit inside the other so that the pointy ents of the funnel went in the same direction and the “mouth” of the two funnels were then strapped together so they wouldn’t come apart. We baited the trap with frog guts. I admit I heaved during this part, but I figured as long as I didn’t have to eat it I could do it. The “bait ball” as it was called was secured inside the larger funnel and they would attract fish to swim in for the grossness. But once in they wouldn’t be able to swim out … even the biggest fish only have little bitty brains and apparently wouldn’t be able to find the hole they swim in through.
We then put a big stone into the funnel as a weight, tied a line to it (that’s where some paracord came in) and then tossed it out into the creek and then tied the other end of the paracord to a handy dandy tree or rock. I was starving by then and so was Bam-Bam. The guys were used to me going off a bit by myself, especially with Lincoln and Markham no longer tailing me for a grade, but when Chief Jackson Jr. made a comment about not following the buddy system, I flopped down on a piece of old plastic table cloth that I kept to have a place to change Bam-Bam on while we were on the trail and then turned my back to everyone and gave the bottomless pit what he wanted.
Similar to the way we’d done things in the past Chay sat with his back to mine and I didn’t think much of it until I was startled when a knife came into my line of sight. I wasn’t alarmed though because on the knife’s point was a slice of cheese.
“Thanks.”
He grunted.
A minute later the knife reappeared with a piece of apple on it.
“Thanks but you should eat.”
“Am.”
And it went like that while I nursed and then when I struggled to feed Bam-Bam a cup of mashed green beans the guys started making a game out of feeding me bits and pieces out of the trail lunch that had been packed in. I was pretty good at catching the raisins and granola clusters they tossed at me while trying to convince Bam-Bam to not act like he was going to eat the spork I was using to shovel the green things in to his buzzsaw. Things looked “normal,” or at least the artificial normal they had been a while back, but I still had to keep reminding myself not to let the previous feelings swamp me. The guys must have sensed it, or at least suspected and were trying to keep things on an even keel, because they were playful without being pushy and expecting any more than I willingly gave.
Not long after that they must have thought that I had tired of their game for a minute before they realized I wasn’t just ignoring them but was staring at something I’d just noticed on the other side of the creek.
“Chief?” I said, getting his attention.
Chief Jackson caught on from where he was sitting eating his own lunch. A little tensely he asked, “Bear?”
“No Sir. Uh … a floater.”
“A what?”
“Floater Sir.” I looked at Chay then pointed. His eyes followed my finger to the point I indicated then he gargled, “Take Bams. Get over by that boulder. Now.”
His tone didn’t invite debate and the other men picked up on it and then looked to try and see what we’d seen. Dallas saw it first followed quickly by Cooper and the two Jacksons. I whispered from my new location, “That wasn’t there before unless it just came to the surface. I was seriously thinking about asking permission to try and gather some cattail fluff off those big ones in that same spot.”
“It wasn’t there,” Chief Jackson confirmed. “I was thinking about doing the same thing.” He looked at Mrs. Chief Jackson and she shook her head minutely. He turned a considering look at us and I was the first to get it.
“Chief? Didn’t you say your wife was going to be in sometime today? Or was it yesterday? Shouldn’t we be heading back so you can meet her?”
Chay grunted, Cooper nodded, and Dallas said, “Doe, the Chief will leave when he’s doggone good and ready. Beyond that it’s none of our business so keep that kind of discussion to a minimum. Help me check the lines while Coop and Chay do whatever it is that the Chief needs.”
“Coming,” I said nonchalantly as I folded up my mat and then followed him downriver to the lines toting a blessedly topped off tank of baby.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
First thing first, Chay and Cooper went upstream to a narrow crossing point and then back to where the body had hung up in the cattails. While they did that Chief Jackson escorted his wife to a primitive parking area and she apparently drove back to some family compound. He got back about the same time as Chay and Cooper.
“Report.”
It was Cooper that said, “Female. Can’t tell much more than that. Been in the water at least a day. Not enough decomp or animal depredation for it to be too much more than that. What appears to be some damage to the face but could be post mortem injuries. Water isn’t cold enough to throw things off by much. Looks like the body was originally weighted, there’s some kind of cord wrapped around the ankle. Decomp gasses may have finally made her bob to the surface. More ‘n that you need a professional to look at it Chief.”
“How was the body dressed.”
“Female-ish.”
When the Chief gave Cooper a look for being Cooper, Chay gargled, “Not a trainee. Dressed business casual but all in tans and dark greens like it might be a uniform or dress code.”
“All in tans and greens you say?”
Both men nodded.
“Hair style?”
Cooper said, “Short. Looks like Dallas’ when he gets out of the shower.”
Dallas was a dark blonde/light brunette with a side part. Buzzed up the sides, longer on top. It was a modified military haircut that he’d adopted because of the limited movement in the wrist and elbow he had on his dominate side.
The Chief sniffed and then said, “McCormick, I need you to bear witness, but I have a feeling it is going to be rough. You up for your part?”
“The Judge?”
He looked at me and nodded then said, “At the least. If that is who I think it is over there, there’s gonna be a stink.”
He immediately made a call on his sat phone.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A stink? And then some. Pieces were beginning to come together to form a really nasty picture. I didn’t completely realize it at the time however. I was picking up on something but honestly hadn’t started to make connections. I sensed that the guys were seeing something, but no one explained anything. All I had was a niggling feeling in the back of my head that something was there, but it was more mist and fog than anything of substance.
The woman was a known activist … a green politics activist. Supposedly she was moderate but the groups she primarily worked for were anything but. Jan and Jen got the fidgets, but I was never able to ask them because we were never alone in a safe enough location long enough for me to do so. It took me a while to figure out that was on purpose. It took me longer than that to figure out that they weren’t being more of what I’d thought of everyone but were honestly trying to protect Bam-Bam and I.
Of course, law enforcement had to be called in and somehow or other – probably from an inside informant – that woman’s friends made a beeline for The Farm and tried to set up shop.
“Not on my land,” the Judge intoned like he was handing down a weighty verdict.
“We have rights.”
“And those rights end where mine begin and as such unless you want to be evicted as trespassers you will calm yourselves and behave like ladies … or else.”
The Sheriff had been forced to call in the Feds due to the activists having federal protection from some recent court case. The federal investigator and her partner that showed up eerily quick didn’t take anything off anyone. “Enough. Both of you keep your people under control. If I even suspect battery is in the offing from anyone, I’ll arrest you on probable cause. And if you cross the yellow tape you might be a while being found by whoever you expect to bail you out.” She was looking at everyone, not just the activists, and the message might as well have been shouted.
I played least in sight until I saw Mari wander into the area. She should have been with her training crew, but she was by herself and looking a little more purposeful than she had in a while when she started to make a beeline for the activists. It wasn’t long before I saw her get pushed around by a couple of the women over in that group. The last time she tried to get beyond their outer ring of people she got pushed back really hard and tripped and then fell on some granite shards that had worked their way up through the exposed red clay near the bank of the creek. She looked so forlorn and confused and then I saw one of her hands was bleeding. I hurried over and got her out of the line of fire.
“Mari. Mari come over here and let me look at your hand. It looks like you cut it and there is dirt smeared all over it.”
Mari barely seemed able to focus. “Dirt is good. It is a blessing from Gaia.”
“Yep. For sure,” I said humoring her. “Dirt definitely has its place just like everything else, but inside a wound isn’t one of them. C’mon. Let’s get out from underfoot. They seem … um … kinda focused right now.”
She let me pull her over to the tree I’d been standing under and then sat down and while she wasn’t exactly letting me, she wasn’t exactly fighting me either while I cleaned her hand. “You’re pretty scraped up Mari. You need to let someone at the clinic take a look at it to make sure I got it completely cleaned out. At least have them put some ointment on it.”
“It … It’s smiling at me,” she said like she didn’t quite know what else to say.
It took me a sec to comprehend what she was talking about. I’d noticed Bam-Bam was being nosey but I hadn’t realized he was trying to be a clown. “Sorry,” I told her. “He likes to do that. A lot.”
It really surprised me when she said, “He does?” It was the first time that she’d ever used a pronoun other than “it” when referring to a kid, especially my kid.
“Yeah. He doesn’t mean any harm. I figure he just has a naturally sunny nature. You know, like he was born with it and stuff. Here, let me get some of this mud off and …”
“No. No I will go back to my room and change.” She turned to leave and then looked back at the knot of females that had pushed her around then at me and seemed to become upset again and left in a hurry.
Chapter 32 -2
I watched until I was sure that she’d taken the correct path and then turned to find the Judge watching me closely. I quickly picked up the tissues that I’d used to clean Mari’s hand and then tried to get back over to the guys but the Federal investigator called me over.
“Your name is?”
“Doe McCormick, ma’am.”
“Your full legal name, not a knickname.”
“That is my legal name ma’am. I was adopted. Um, you’ll see it in the file you pull up on me. I’m not being disrespectful or stupid on purpose.”
“Hmm.” She cleared her throat. “I’ve been told you spotted the body.”
“Yes ma’am. We were cleaning up from break.”
“Why did no one else notice it?”
“Huh? Oh. I was sitting at a different angle. I had just finished nursing and …”
“Excuse me?”
Bam-Bam chose that moment to pop up from the sling and blow raspberries. I winced but the woman didn’t seem to mind after she got over her initial startle.
“Nursing. I see.”
“Yes ma’am. I had my back to everyone, so my direct line of sight was different from the others. As soon as my brain was sure of what my eyes were seeing I told Chief Jackson.”
“Not Trainee Trahern?”
I saw the trap and quickly answered, “I got Chief Jackson’s attention first. He thought maybe I saw a bear until I said I saw a floater. After that I was told to get over to the bolder and stay out of the way.”
“You weren’t part of the investigation?”
“I wouldn’t call it an investigation per se, at least not an official one. Chief Jackson organized two of the men to make sure our eyes were seeing what they were seeing, and I suppose also to make sure that there wasn’t someone in distress. I remained on this side and helped to make sure our lines were securely tied off so they wouldn’t get in the way one way or the other.”
“Your lines?”
“From today’s lesson. We are learning sustainable and native ways of harvesting nature. Today was a locavore lesson combined with a lesson on native and ancient sustainable fishing methods.”
“Did you catch anything?” she asked, rather tongue in cheek.
“Unknown ma’am. The lesson wasn’t completed due to … um … the reason why you are here.”
“You seem rather calm.”
As quietly as I could I said, “My father was in law enforcement. I know what’s proper and being hysterical only creates more work for other people.”
“Hmmm,” she said as her partner scribbled something on a field tablet. “And since we are on the subject, do you also have military experience?”
“Er … no ma’am. I’m not old enough to enlist yet.”
“Age?” she said with a bit of bite to her voice.
“Seventeen ma’am. I’ll be eighteen the very end of summer.”
“And why is a seventeen-year-old girl with a baby assigned to this particular trainee group?”
She wasn’t looking at me when she asked the rather terse question but I pretended she was. “Well ma’am you see, it’s my background. Because of it, and because of potential problems with other trainees with their own issues, it was decided it would be less disruptive to the training process.”
“Oh really.”
I got away with it by surprising her with my matter-of-fact approach. “Yes ma’am. The men in this crew have a tendency to be protective. It gave me an opportunity to learn survival skills that I really need to get along in the world once I graduate so I’m no longer a burden on the social order of things while at the same time, gave the men the opportunity to show they have reintegrated into society after their service to this country. Chief Jackson is a strong Chief and manages to work the lessons so that all of us have the opportunity to learn at a pace that doesn’t interfere with other training groups. Plus, while I’m primarily under Chief Jackson’s supervision for field training, Chief Delray is the Chief I answer to in Family and Children, Chief Madison is who I answer to as far as residency issues, Chief Clancy is Academics, Chief Lark is …”
Surprising me a bit she interrupted by saying, “So what you’re saying is that you are well supervised.”
I closed my mouth and then said, “Yes ma’am. Totally.”
It seems the woman had a reasonable sense of humor and released me from questioning then went over to the woman that seemed to be in charge of the group that had pushed Mari around. Immediately there was a bunch of growling and snapping and snarling and I worked my way behind the Chief and guys to get out of the blast zone. Chay looked at me and pointed his finger and I saw he was pointing to their gear. I went over and played “guard” though it was likely just for appearances sake. That’s where the Judge cornered me.
“In the middle of trouble again.”
I stood quickly and said, “Not by choice Your Honor.”
He snorted like he didn’t believe it. When I didn’t do anything else but stand there and at least try to have the appearance of being respectful he chuffed a sarcastic laugh and said, “Learning to keep your mouth shut.” After a moment of my continued silence he said, “Nothing to say?”
“You didn’t ask me a question before Your Honor.”
I could feel the others in the crew watching me from the corner of their eyes but there was no way for them to intervene without making a scene.
“Well I’m asking you a question now Trainee. Have you learned to keep your F@#$%&@ mouth shut?” in a tone a drill instructor would have admired.
Unfortunately, at least from some perspectives, the federal woman’s partner had been watching from the sidelines though no one had noticed. He stepped over and casually said, “Judge Haygood, in case you’ve forgotten, we are required to have on body cameras. At all times.”
That’s when a couple of people that had been milling about casually made a point of coming over and calling the Judge away. One of them came back my way about thirty minutes later.
“You’re Trainee Doe McCormick.”
“Yes Sir.”
“My name is Terrance Haygood. I’m the legal counsel for The Farm.”
“Oh? How do you do Sir?” Then I shut up again. Having an LEO for a father gave me at least enough smarts that in some instances I knew when to keep my mouth shut.
“How old is the child?” he asked. And you could tell that the question was more than it appeared on the surface.
Okay, maybe not quite so smart. “Mr. Haygood, if you are about to threaten me or my child … don’t. I’m willing to tow the line in exchange for a job opportunity. I have no desire for anything to be turned into anything other than that.”
I had spiked his guns a bit by my surprise capitulation. “That was … blunt.”
“No Sir … expedient. Time is a valuable commodity for both of us. You, because you are an important man with important work; me because I don’t have any to waste. So here it is. You’ve doubtless read my file. It seems like everyone and their mother has at this point. You know my father was a cop. You know I’ve experienced the legal system at several levels. You know I’ve never been in trouble because I went looking for it. You know that the only thing I did to get in trouble here at The Farm was stand up to a bully. Because of this, for whatever reason, the Judge has taken a personal dislike of me and decided to make an example out of me. I took my punishment for that incident without complaint. I didn’t even make the stink I could have at how it put my kid at risk. I haven’t complained at the amount of credits that were taken from me since apparently I was more than daft for having been trying to work to get ahead in that area to begin with. I’ve gotten back on the bicycle and I am peddling as fast as I can to make up lost ground. Given that, why do you think that I am going to waste time to go out of my way to create more trouble for myself, my kid, and the Staff here at The Farm that are just trying to do their job? Whysoever the Judge is pushing me to make a stink, I don’t know, but it isn’t my plan for it to happen. I’ve learned that bullies are tolerated around here. All I’m doing is surviving this boot camp and then I will move on, with or without the promised assistance. The only thing that might make me … let’s just say that might make me forget not to complain … is if my child is threatened again. I have nothing else and no one left in this world but him. Beyond that, I have nothing to lose.”
He looked at me speculatively for a moment then said, “You keep to that and there won’t be trouble.”
“The only trouble comes is if you try and harm my child … and I consider taking him away from me a great big fat ol’ mark in the harm column. Like I said, my father was a cop … I’m well aware of how the system is supposed to work.”
I emphasized the word supposed but all he did was quirk an eyebrow at me. “You have quite a mouth on you.”
“Not to be ornery or contradictory but no Sir, I don’t. I was standing here quietly and out of the way when first the federal agent questioned me, then the judge started talking at me, and now you come to me to deliver some kind of message; not the other way around. I am well aware of just how low on the totem pole of life that I am. I neither need nor want trouble. I just want to do my time, get a job, and support my kid so that neither one of us is dependent on charity for the rest of our lives. Any other noise being made isn’t coming from me.”
He gave me another penetrating look then said, “As I said, keep it that way and there won’t be trouble. Get back to your team.”
“I’m already there Sir. If I move I’ll actually be leaving where I’ve been told to stand. I’ll need permission from Chief Jackson to move from this spot.”
A little irritated at not being able to dismiss me he turned on his heel and stalked off without trying to reveal just how much he didn’t like being able to order me to leave his presence. Unfortunately, I’d met his type before and it didn’t give me any pleasure to meet another one. Bam-Bam needed a change and that stinky diaper took my mind off of the other stinky stuff. I was settling Bam-Bam back into his sling when the lady agent returned to ask the same questions she had before then she added a new one.
“You appear to have the attention of Judge Haygood.”
“No ma’am. Not particularly anyway. He takes an interest in everything that has to do with The Farm. He heads security and his desk is where the buck stops.”
“Hmmm. And you can say you aren’t being intimidated to say what you’ve said?”
Dad taught me well. “No ma’am, I saw exactly what I saw.”
She knew what I was avoiding and flat out asked, “The Judge is not intimidating you to answer questions a certain way?”
“I realize the Judge can be intimidating – his years on the bench is probably what has done it – but I answered your questions honestly. I saw the body, notified Chief Jackson, then from there local LEO was involved. My understanding is that they then called you in.”
I could see she was about to get more particular in her questions, but I was saved from having to outright lie by the Sheriff coming over and saying, “Woman’s SO confessed. Claims it was an accident. Records show they’ve had several domestic calls over the last few weeks with claims of infidelity precipitating most of them. The body was put here to exacerbate existing tensions and to put the attention elsewhere.”
I pretended I was deaf by looking elsewhere. The agent walked off with the sheriff and I was left to twiddle my thumbs until Dallas limped over.
“Uh …”
“Someone over there stepped on my good foot and I twisted my knee.”
“That sucks. Does it feel like it is swelling? Have Cooper looked at it.”
“I ain’t dropping my damn pants right here just so’s he can check my knee,” he said casually. I understood to keep my voice down and to not draw attention. “Besides, Cooper has his hands full. That hysterical guy all those fems are clucking over was the vic’s brother. Coop got volunteered to watch ‘em until a certified medico could arrive from town. It ain’t gonna get pretty if they don’t hurry it up. Whoever the girlfriend was, she better take the sheriff’s offer of being taken into custody. I’ve been hearing some promises of unnatural retribution if she gets caught by her former friends.”
“Maybe I’m stupid about this stuff, but why wouldn’t that group be closing ranks around their friend instead of around the floater and her brother? It seems backwards.”
“And that’s a question you’re not going to ask again. Any and all things related to this incident is NOYB. Got it Minnow?”
I was irritated for about two seconds until I felt one of them puzzle pieces form and realized more was going on than what was on the surface. I wasn’t interested in getting into anything that might endanger Bam-Bam so, while it might have seemed self-serving or cowardly, I did exactly what Dallas said. My turtle head got pulled firmly into my shell.
I watched until I was sure that she’d taken the correct path and then turned to find the Judge watching me closely. I quickly picked up the tissues that I’d used to clean Mari’s hand and then tried to get back over to the guys but the Federal investigator called me over.
“Your name is?”
“Doe McCormick, ma’am.”
“Your full legal name, not a knickname.”
“That is my legal name ma’am. I was adopted. Um, you’ll see it in the file you pull up on me. I’m not being disrespectful or stupid on purpose.”
“Hmm.” She cleared her throat. “I’ve been told you spotted the body.”
“Yes ma’am. We were cleaning up from break.”
“Why did no one else notice it?”
“Huh? Oh. I was sitting at a different angle. I had just finished nursing and …”
“Excuse me?”
Bam-Bam chose that moment to pop up from the sling and blow raspberries. I winced but the woman didn’t seem to mind after she got over her initial startle.
“Nursing. I see.”
“Yes ma’am. I had my back to everyone, so my direct line of sight was different from the others. As soon as my brain was sure of what my eyes were seeing I told Chief Jackson.”
“Not Trainee Trahern?”
I saw the trap and quickly answered, “I got Chief Jackson’s attention first. He thought maybe I saw a bear until I said I saw a floater. After that I was told to get over to the bolder and stay out of the way.”
“You weren’t part of the investigation?”
“I wouldn’t call it an investigation per se, at least not an official one. Chief Jackson organized two of the men to make sure our eyes were seeing what they were seeing, and I suppose also to make sure that there wasn’t someone in distress. I remained on this side and helped to make sure our lines were securely tied off so they wouldn’t get in the way one way or the other.”
“Your lines?”
“From today’s lesson. We are learning sustainable and native ways of harvesting nature. Today was a locavore lesson combined with a lesson on native and ancient sustainable fishing methods.”
“Did you catch anything?” she asked, rather tongue in cheek.
“Unknown ma’am. The lesson wasn’t completed due to … um … the reason why you are here.”
“You seem rather calm.”
As quietly as I could I said, “My father was in law enforcement. I know what’s proper and being hysterical only creates more work for other people.”
“Hmmm,” she said as her partner scribbled something on a field tablet. “And since we are on the subject, do you also have military experience?”
“Er … no ma’am. I’m not old enough to enlist yet.”
“Age?” she said with a bit of bite to her voice.
“Seventeen ma’am. I’ll be eighteen the very end of summer.”
“And why is a seventeen-year-old girl with a baby assigned to this particular trainee group?”
She wasn’t looking at me when she asked the rather terse question but I pretended she was. “Well ma’am you see, it’s my background. Because of it, and because of potential problems with other trainees with their own issues, it was decided it would be less disruptive to the training process.”
“Oh really.”
I got away with it by surprising her with my matter-of-fact approach. “Yes ma’am. The men in this crew have a tendency to be protective. It gave me an opportunity to learn survival skills that I really need to get along in the world once I graduate so I’m no longer a burden on the social order of things while at the same time, gave the men the opportunity to show they have reintegrated into society after their service to this country. Chief Jackson is a strong Chief and manages to work the lessons so that all of us have the opportunity to learn at a pace that doesn’t interfere with other training groups. Plus, while I’m primarily under Chief Jackson’s supervision for field training, Chief Delray is the Chief I answer to in Family and Children, Chief Madison is who I answer to as far as residency issues, Chief Clancy is Academics, Chief Lark is …”
Surprising me a bit she interrupted by saying, “So what you’re saying is that you are well supervised.”
I closed my mouth and then said, “Yes ma’am. Totally.”
It seems the woman had a reasonable sense of humor and released me from questioning then went over to the woman that seemed to be in charge of the group that had pushed Mari around. Immediately there was a bunch of growling and snapping and snarling and I worked my way behind the Chief and guys to get out of the blast zone. Chay looked at me and pointed his finger and I saw he was pointing to their gear. I went over and played “guard” though it was likely just for appearances sake. That’s where the Judge cornered me.
“In the middle of trouble again.”
I stood quickly and said, “Not by choice Your Honor.”
He snorted like he didn’t believe it. When I didn’t do anything else but stand there and at least try to have the appearance of being respectful he chuffed a sarcastic laugh and said, “Learning to keep your mouth shut.” After a moment of my continued silence he said, “Nothing to say?”
“You didn’t ask me a question before Your Honor.”
I could feel the others in the crew watching me from the corner of their eyes but there was no way for them to intervene without making a scene.
“Well I’m asking you a question now Trainee. Have you learned to keep your F@#$%&@ mouth shut?” in a tone a drill instructor would have admired.
Unfortunately, at least from some perspectives, the federal woman’s partner had been watching from the sidelines though no one had noticed. He stepped over and casually said, “Judge Haygood, in case you’ve forgotten, we are required to have on body cameras. At all times.”
That’s when a couple of people that had been milling about casually made a point of coming over and calling the Judge away. One of them came back my way about thirty minutes later.
“You’re Trainee Doe McCormick.”
“Yes Sir.”
“My name is Terrance Haygood. I’m the legal counsel for The Farm.”
“Oh? How do you do Sir?” Then I shut up again. Having an LEO for a father gave me at least enough smarts that in some instances I knew when to keep my mouth shut.
“How old is the child?” he asked. And you could tell that the question was more than it appeared on the surface.
Okay, maybe not quite so smart. “Mr. Haygood, if you are about to threaten me or my child … don’t. I’m willing to tow the line in exchange for a job opportunity. I have no desire for anything to be turned into anything other than that.”
I had spiked his guns a bit by my surprise capitulation. “That was … blunt.”
“No Sir … expedient. Time is a valuable commodity for both of us. You, because you are an important man with important work; me because I don’t have any to waste. So here it is. You’ve doubtless read my file. It seems like everyone and their mother has at this point. You know my father was a cop. You know I’ve experienced the legal system at several levels. You know I’ve never been in trouble because I went looking for it. You know that the only thing I did to get in trouble here at The Farm was stand up to a bully. Because of this, for whatever reason, the Judge has taken a personal dislike of me and decided to make an example out of me. I took my punishment for that incident without complaint. I didn’t even make the stink I could have at how it put my kid at risk. I haven’t complained at the amount of credits that were taken from me since apparently I was more than daft for having been trying to work to get ahead in that area to begin with. I’ve gotten back on the bicycle and I am peddling as fast as I can to make up lost ground. Given that, why do you think that I am going to waste time to go out of my way to create more trouble for myself, my kid, and the Staff here at The Farm that are just trying to do their job? Whysoever the Judge is pushing me to make a stink, I don’t know, but it isn’t my plan for it to happen. I’ve learned that bullies are tolerated around here. All I’m doing is surviving this boot camp and then I will move on, with or without the promised assistance. The only thing that might make me … let’s just say that might make me forget not to complain … is if my child is threatened again. I have nothing else and no one left in this world but him. Beyond that, I have nothing to lose.”
He looked at me speculatively for a moment then said, “You keep to that and there won’t be trouble.”
“The only trouble comes is if you try and harm my child … and I consider taking him away from me a great big fat ol’ mark in the harm column. Like I said, my father was a cop … I’m well aware of how the system is supposed to work.”
I emphasized the word supposed but all he did was quirk an eyebrow at me. “You have quite a mouth on you.”
“Not to be ornery or contradictory but no Sir, I don’t. I was standing here quietly and out of the way when first the federal agent questioned me, then the judge started talking at me, and now you come to me to deliver some kind of message; not the other way around. I am well aware of just how low on the totem pole of life that I am. I neither need nor want trouble. I just want to do my time, get a job, and support my kid so that neither one of us is dependent on charity for the rest of our lives. Any other noise being made isn’t coming from me.”
He gave me another penetrating look then said, “As I said, keep it that way and there won’t be trouble. Get back to your team.”
“I’m already there Sir. If I move I’ll actually be leaving where I’ve been told to stand. I’ll need permission from Chief Jackson to move from this spot.”
A little irritated at not being able to dismiss me he turned on his heel and stalked off without trying to reveal just how much he didn’t like being able to order me to leave his presence. Unfortunately, I’d met his type before and it didn’t give me any pleasure to meet another one. Bam-Bam needed a change and that stinky diaper took my mind off of the other stinky stuff. I was settling Bam-Bam back into his sling when the lady agent returned to ask the same questions she had before then she added a new one.
“You appear to have the attention of Judge Haygood.”
“No ma’am. Not particularly anyway. He takes an interest in everything that has to do with The Farm. He heads security and his desk is where the buck stops.”
“Hmmm. And you can say you aren’t being intimidated to say what you’ve said?”
Dad taught me well. “No ma’am, I saw exactly what I saw.”
She knew what I was avoiding and flat out asked, “The Judge is not intimidating you to answer questions a certain way?”
“I realize the Judge can be intimidating – his years on the bench is probably what has done it – but I answered your questions honestly. I saw the body, notified Chief Jackson, then from there local LEO was involved. My understanding is that they then called you in.”
I could see she was about to get more particular in her questions, but I was saved from having to outright lie by the Sheriff coming over and saying, “Woman’s SO confessed. Claims it was an accident. Records show they’ve had several domestic calls over the last few weeks with claims of infidelity precipitating most of them. The body was put here to exacerbate existing tensions and to put the attention elsewhere.”
I pretended I was deaf by looking elsewhere. The agent walked off with the sheriff and I was left to twiddle my thumbs until Dallas limped over.
“Uh …”
“Someone over there stepped on my good foot and I twisted my knee.”
“That sucks. Does it feel like it is swelling? Have Cooper looked at it.”
“I ain’t dropping my damn pants right here just so’s he can check my knee,” he said casually. I understood to keep my voice down and to not draw attention. “Besides, Cooper has his hands full. That hysterical guy all those fems are clucking over was the vic’s brother. Coop got volunteered to watch ‘em until a certified medico could arrive from town. It ain’t gonna get pretty if they don’t hurry it up. Whoever the girlfriend was, she better take the sheriff’s offer of being taken into custody. I’ve been hearing some promises of unnatural retribution if she gets caught by her former friends.”
“Maybe I’m stupid about this stuff, but why wouldn’t that group be closing ranks around their friend instead of around the floater and her brother? It seems backwards.”
“And that’s a question you’re not going to ask again. Any and all things related to this incident is NOYB. Got it Minnow?”
I was irritated for about two seconds until I felt one of them puzzle pieces form and realized more was going on than what was on the surface. I wasn’t interested in getting into anything that might endanger Bam-Bam so, while it might have seemed self-serving or cowardly, I did exactly what Dallas said. My turtle head got pulled firmly into my shell.
CHAPTER 33 - 1
May turned into June and I learned that Georgia could be as doggone hot as Florida and a little more miserable besides because there was no cross breeze from the Gulf or Atlantic to ease the weather. On the lower elevations when it got humid, it stayed humid … very humid … and buggy. Did I mention humid and buggy? And nasty. Only sans the sand I grew up with and instead gritty red clay that got everywhere. Like I said, humid, buggy, and nasty. The only relief was if you were lucky enough to have a Chief that knew where there were a few hidden spots in the surrounding mountains where you could get away for a little bit and sometimes even take a dip in a cool stream or even a small waterfall. And the fact that the Chief was just as interested in escaping humid, buggy, and nasty meant that he planned all the hiking routes to include those extra special getaways and would join you. As Mom used to say, “Cool beans.”
As for the rest of it I struggled along, and even managed to catch up though at the rate the academics was coming at me, the idea of getting ahead was a pipe dream I no longer aspired to. I suspected, but could never prove, that Mickey had a direct hand in that. I got curious when I realized I would no sooner get close to advancing ahead when just enough assignments were added to my cue to push me behind again. It happened again one night during study hall and I got so frustrated I let slip a curse.
“Doe?!”
Embarrassed despite myself I said, “Oh stop it. It’s not like you all don’t sling it once in a while.”
Chay was looking a question at me but it was Cooper that asked, “Yeah, but you don’t and you give us … heck … enough of those times because of the kidlet. Whatever has lit your tailfeathers must be something big.”
I sighed and tried to brush them off but none of them would have it. Jan said, “Might as well spit it out. You know we ain’t gonna stop.”
“Geez,” I groused and then proceeded to explain my frustration. That’s when Chay took my tablet and did something so that the properties of my assignment page were revealed. He showed me who was accessing my files. Mickey is smart but apparently he isn’t cleaver; he didn’t realized Chief Clancy had tagged his date/time stamp to validate him and give specific permission to him as her apprentice.
“Fix little shit’s wagon,” Chay growled.
When he explained he could insert a script or something like that to create a few problems, I turned him down.
“Us getting caught at something like that is just asking for trouble. I’ll survive. And I’ll do it despite Mickey’s tricks. People willing to do that are likely willing to do other things and my guess is he’ll trip himself up eventually or he’ll push the wrong button and get his block knocked off. Just let it go. More notice and extra special attention none of us need.”
Basically, math was a subject I survived and that’s all I’ll say about it. The sciences I enjoyed save for the few assignments that Chief Clancy tried her best to spoil by making them as boring as humanly possible. History was another one I enjoyed for the most part though writing papers to prove that I was actually keeping up with the vid assignments nearly broke me when I wound up with a calculus exam, a paper on the history of conservation and its consequences both good and bad, a persuasive paper for Chief Delray on teaching your child sex ed at home prior to school age, a special request formal gown for Chief Lark and the thrift store, a practical demonstration for Chief Jackson by gathering and providing a survival meal for our crew, and the next project for Chief Haygood all due in the same three day period. If not for Bam-Bam I would have probably dug my own grave and happily laid down and never gotten up. I was running on fumes and a secret cache of caffeine-rich yaupon tea I’d made myself from stuff that Chief Jackson had shown us and then subsequently told us to forget about. Yeah, like that was going to happen. Dad had drunk the stuff like it was manna on some days and I was beginning to understand why.
Speaking of projects for Chief Haygood, against my druthers I continued to enjoy the projects he set and even learned a lot … and learned to respect the man despite his surname. Essentially the projects were variations on the idea that I had my own re-fashion business once again. One time the shop was completely online as I’d started out. Another time I had a brick-and-mortar store and I had to determine how that would affect my bottom line, what the benefits and restrictions would be, and how I would compete with online-only versions in the same industry. Sometimes I was the business owner and sometimes I was a manager. One assignment had me as a lowly entry-level employee and I caught him trying to trip me up, but I didn’t hold it against him, especially when for completing those assignments correctly I “won” an ultralight sleeping bag that was rated for zero degrees Fahrenheit; that meant it would keep a body warm despite it being too cold for words. It came with its own stuff bag to compact it down to about a half-liter in size. While I was proud of having earned the sleeping bag – it was obviously second hand as it was discolored in a couple of places but I didn’t care – I was also happy to enjoy the assignments because it wasn’t so much I was learning something completely new, but was learning things that gave me hope that I could find a way to do something other than dig someone else’s latrine ditches for the remainder of my life. Make no mistake, I wasn’t friends with Chief Haygood, but we did manage to have a decent mentor/student relationship.
Then he posed a question, “Where are you going to get the capital for starting a business?”
The first thought in my head was the Trust but something held me back from mentioning it. A big part of that was I was no longer certain it would be there like the lawyer said it would be, or that some Big Brother “to protect the children” wouldn’t take control of it and I’d never see anything anyway. So I stuck with the reality I thought was the most likely in my response.
“The kind of business it would be wouldn’t invite too much debt so I’ll have to save the majority of it up or start really small, or a combination of the two. When I had my real-life business, I started out dumpster-diving and looking for hidden gems in thrift stores. I could do the same again and then once I’m secure in my position I could possibly find a partner; but hopefully it would be a working partner and not just one in it for financial gain.”
“Meaning?”
“Maybe if I can’t find someone that Is good on the craft and sewing side, they can be good at the acquisition or the advertising and sales side of the business. We’d both have skin in the game. My mother used to have friends that ran a vintage junk shop. The wife was the face of the business and was in the store every day doing what she called staging, getting other vendors to rent space, and interacting with customers, while the husband travelled and went to estates and auctions and things like that. Mom said she wouldn’t have liked the separation from Dad that her friends endured but on the other hand they said it suited their personalities … they loved each other and junk but they were both very Type A and needed an area where they were in charge, being their own boss, and having their own space in the business helped them to keep from brangling all the time.”
“Would you like a relationship of that nature?”
“Business or personal?” I asked though I had some suspicion of what he meant.
“Personal, but either/or.”
“Right now Sir, I’m not interested in any kind of ‘relationship’ and I’m not sure I ever will. I hear enough about my so-called trust issues from the counselors. Having a long-distance relationship doesn’t seem like it would help with that. And I don’t know, it seems a little mercenary to think about being with someone just to share expenses.” I stopped and shrugged. “It is what it is Chief. If it happens one day then so be it but I’m not going looking for it anytime soon. I have to find a way to be responsible for Bam-Bam before I go looking for anything that could distract me from that.”
“And if there’s a man that would be interested in sharing that responsibility?”
“In exchange for what? Sex? I’ve been desperate before but never desperate enough to sell my body. And I won’t do it just to find some financial backing for a hypothetical business either. That’s way too close to whoring myself out and a good way to lose everything at some point and be left with less than nothing.”
“What if someone wanted to be a partner because you shared a common goal, your strengths and weaknesses complimented each other rather than exacerbated problems?”
Not understanding exactly why he was asking I answered, “Chief I just don’t know. My life is pretty messed up right now. Maybe not as messed up as it was right after the storm but even saying that I don’t see it being any other way for a while. As for the personal part of my crap, I’ve never even had a boyfriend, but I do know trying to have more than a friendship with someone when you can barely tie your own shoes seems like an apocalyptic disaster in the making. Everything I have I need to be able to spend on Bam-Bam – at least for now and the foreseeable future. That would be shortchanging a guy unless all he is after is a friend with benefits and for me that’s just not in the picture. I may not know exactly if or what I want from a guy, but I know I need more than that; Bam-Bam needs me to need more than that.”
The subject was blessedly dropped when the bell rang and it was time to go to the next training period. But it was a conversation that kept picking at me in the little bit of downtime I had. No, I wasn’t ready to take on the “responsibility of a relationship” or whatever the heck you want to call it. No, I was the exact opposite of interested in sex because I was already living with the consequences of it … my own birth and discard, and then the creation and birth of my son. But sometimes I wondered if the time would ever come when I’d be ready or interested; and if it didn’t what did that mean for me once Bam-Bam was old enough that he needed me to let him go have a life of his own. And if that time ever did come what might that guy be like. Could I, while I was raising and taking care of my kid, grow enough, change enough, that at some point I could be worth being in a relationship with. And every once in a while I even let myself think about the few words that Chay had written and I wondered if I’d read them correctly, if I had were they were still true, and how long they would stay true if they were. But there wasn’t much time for that kind of thinking; the learning came hard and fast and constant and it was either keep up or drown.
One of the things I did during this time was to learn some interesting ways of using cattail fluff. You read that correctly; that stuff that looks like the cattail has a bad case of the mange and is shedding all of this “fluff” from the part that is normally brown. Just like the cattail pollen I’d learned to gather in April, cattail fluff that starts showing up around May can be used to stretch what flour you have in your pantry. Some people might view it as we were playing but since we were feeding ourselves from the practical assignments, I prefer to say we were learning life and survival skills. The cattail griddle cakes were my favorite because they were pretty easy and quick to fix. And they went really well with the flower syrups we tried them with. That’s not all you can use cattail fluff for. I found calling it “fluff” was correct because it can be used as a stuffing or insulation between layers of material. It can be used as “tinder” to get a fire going. You can create a reasonable facsimile of a wick and use it in a grease lamp. And one thing was useful for the entire seed head right before It went “fluffy” was as a smoking insect repellent; basically use it as a type of citronella stick. This was something that came in handy a few times when we took a break during our hikes.
Other things we learned to do was deep fry elderflowers creating a really weird and funky kind of fritter. When it was finished it was mostly the fried breading but it had an unusual tart and sweet flavor on the inside of the crispy bits.
We made mushroom “sausage” with Chicken-of-the-Woods mushrooms. Made some pretty good mushroom jerky from them also. The other mushroom in June was reishi and we did so much with them I don’t even know if I can list it all. The other flowers we learned to use and eat were daylily, daisy, honeysuckle, mimosa flowers, and lavender. Jams, jellies, syrups, marmalades, you name it and we tried it. Eating daylily buds was interesting but not something I want to have to do too many times; I like the flowers too much to want to destroy the buds.
The thing about June foraging that I remember the most was all the fruit that suddenly seemed to appear. We saw the last of the wild strawberries and the beginning of the mulberries, serviceberries, feral cherries, and best of all the blackberries. We gathered them all, dried some to show we could, watched the culinary teams turn the fruit into everything imaginable including salsa, and ate as many fresh as we could hold while we were out hiking. And Chay and Chief Jackson also seemed to aid and abet me creating my own resources to hide in my gear. I had small, airtight containers of dried version and of all the fruit and even small, sealed containers of syrups and jellies and preserves and jams. How I came by those containers was surprising.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Trainee?”
I stopped my forward motion and turned to Chief Madison. I hadn’t seen much of the woman for a while beyond the necessary and I wondered what she wanted.
“Yes ma’am?”
“Chief Jackson wants you out at the motor pool pronto. You did say you could drive unassisted?”
“Er … yes ma’am. I helped Chief Lark move some boxes last week when the on-board system was down.”
“Then get a move on.”
It seemed a weird request, but I shrugged that off. Maybe the Chief was just testing me … or needed a handy gopher. I hot-footed it to where I was told to get only to find the Chief there fuming … like steam was practically rising from under his cap … glaring at a group of people that included some of the newer trainees (our newbs as well) and the guys who were sitting there looking like they’d been run over. Then I saw a couple of farm-all movers parked all callywhumpus near a couple of loader/toters.
“Uh … Chief? Chief Madison said …”
“Get over here!”
I got only I was wondering what in the heck I’d done.
“Can you use a loader/toter?”
“Sorry Sir, I never have before but if someone will teach …”
“But you can drive a farm-all without onboard controls?”
“Yeah. Ask Chief Lark … uh … I mean Yes Sir Chief.”
“Thank the Creator for small favors. Hand Junior Minnow to Trahern. He’s out of commission anyway thanks to getting run over by Team Screw-Up over here. I need these boxes moved and I need them moved now. Dallas and Cooper will do the loading.” The look he gave me dared me to move any slower than light speed.
I was trying to see if Chay was hurt and I saw his foot propped on his pack. “Bad?” I whispered as I handed off Bam-Bam.
He just grunted telling me nothing. He didn’t wince but I told Bam-Bam to take it easy on him anyway. I heard a growl from the Chief and moved a little quicker. It took me a second to adjust the seat making me wonder who’d been driving last, the jolly green giant?
Dallas told me, “Pull out and around and come up on the other side of the Loader/Toters, and be careful. Culinary packed these things for shipment and I ain’t paying for any breakage.” That’s when I saw Cooper had started to clean up a box that had been dropped.
I gave Dallas a sassy salute and then did as asked. I then drove the mover over to the area where they shipped the specialty products. I got a couple of startled looks when I pulled in but nothing too rough as they were behind schedule because of whatever the snafu had been. It didn’t take long to get everything transferred from the mover that had jumped the charging rails (and in the process run over Chay a little) and over to shipping; only a couple of trips.
“Chief? Need anything else moved?”
“Don’t be a smart ass. Just park the damn thing and head over to my office. I want to go over that last report.”
“Er … yes Sir.”
“Dallas, Cooper, Trahern … you too,” he snapped.
Chapter 33 - 2
I don’t know what the others were thinking but I was wondering if the Chief was going to treat us like chew toys because the newbs had messed up. And if he did what recourse did we have to let it roll downhill and all over those that had caused his bad mood.
I’d taken Bam-Bam back from Chay and then helped him haul himself up off the ground. He winced and he wasn’t faking. I waited until the four of us were out of earshot of the group that Chief Jackson was now having for a pre-dinner snack and asked, “What hurts? And don’t say nothing or just growl.”
He growled anyway.
“Cute. Real cute. Seriously, if you don’t want Nurse Gilroy getting a view of your nether regions then let Cooper check whether you’re just shaken, stirred, or if there is legitimate breakage.”
He growled again.
“Want me to toss you in the bushes? Bet I could do it, especially if you’re hurt.”
He sighed and then said, “Just foot. Idiot drove over it.”
“Cooper?”
Cooper snorted a laugh. “Dude, just give in. The more you try and resist the worse she is going to get. And if she tosses you in the bushes I ain’t gonna be the one to dig you out.”
We’d arrived at Chief Jackson’s office and very reluctantly Chay started taking his boot off.
“Oh for … I’m practically hanging out for the world to see while I’m feeding Bam-Bam and you turn red as a beet and you haven’t even got a sock off yet.” I turned my back.
Dallas gave me a look and I asked, “What?”
“Doe … knock it off.”
“I’m not doing anything wrong!”
“We all have our … er … sensitivities.”
Having had enough I turned around and watched Chay try and hide his sockless foot real quickly. All three men then growled.
“E … nough,” I growled right back at them. “If I can put up with you and the rest of the flaming world seeing my facial scars then I don’t want to hear a doggone thing from you. Not to mention you obviously haven’t thought about the fact that to fix my face they had to take bits and pieces of me from other places on my body which means that my face isn’t the only place where I have scars. A couple of the bone grafts didn’t take the first time around so they had to go get more bone from the next place … hip, leg, and I even have a scar under my hair where they took some bone from my skull hoping that the proximity meant that my body would accept it better. I’ve got places where they had to take skin so that they could seal up my face … after more than one surgery you jerks. So, I get you have scars. I’m sorry you do because I know how it feels. But since I know how it feels you don’t have to treat me like I’ll barf or something. Look at me … there’s more than one reason that I’ll never …”
I stopped, surprised at what I’d almost said. I turned to stalk off, but Chief Jackson and Chief Madison were standing there trying to keep their faces blank. I fought an internal war but finally won. I’d embarrassed myself and it was a hard pill to swallow. Then Bam-Bam blew very wet raspberries all over my face. I was still holding him rather than put him in the sling.
“Thanks,” I told him sighing. “Your timing is impeccable as always.”
He laughed and bounced in my arms.
Rather than give me a hard time everyone let it pass. I ignored the three guys and followed Chief Madison when she beckoned me inside. That’s when I noticed she was carrying a canvas tote. She sat it down and I heard it clink.
“Help me get this organized. Quickly.”
I knew that the cleaners had just been in the room, so I put Bam-Bam down to crawl and then started helping Chief take these small bottles out of the bag. We lined them up by kind and then Chief Madison hit the intercom.
Chief Jackson walked in with the men and a bundle in his own hands. He looked at all four of us and said, “Shut up. Don’t say a word. The situation on The Farm is becoming fluid and may turn into a bug out event. Be prepared.”
I was completely shocked but Chay elbowed me and I closed my mouth with a snap. The bottles were from the box that had been broken open by the newbs. They were divided four ways. We were told to put them in our back packs and then secure them in our rooms in some way. Next Chief Jackson pulled out vacuum sealed packages of samples of the dried fruit, fruit paste, flours, and jerkeys that we’d been making. Those were also stuffed into our packs.
I didn’t know what to say and the three men said nothing either. The Chief settled it by saying, “Scram. Make good use of your time.”
I started walking out and Chief Madison said, “Doe?”
I turned back around and said, “Ma’am?”
“Where did you learn to drive unassisted?”
I smiled surprising everyone. “My dad. He always disabled the autopilots on all the gadgets and gizmos we had. He said people should have to learn how to drive things without autopilot before they were allowed to use it. Mom was the same way; you had to learn to do things what she called ‘long hand’ before you were allowed to use any shortcuts. I used to back the car out of the garage for him. And I could drive the riding lawnmower and stuff when …” My smiled faltered. “Then after … after he wasn’t with us anymore, I had to do it because Mom couldn’t. She … she got sick you see and …” I shook my head. “Anyway, that’s how I know. Is there anything else ma’am?”
“No. But the more you talk about them the more interesting your parents sound.”
I managed a small smile and said, “Yes ma’am. They were that and a lot more besides. May I go now?”
She nodded and said, “Dismissed.”
I was trying not to fall into a funk because I knew my parents would not have wanted good memories to do bad things to me, but it wasn’t easy.
Chay quietly asked, “S’ okay?”
“It will be. I don’t exactly have a choice.”
I don’t know what the others were thinking but I was wondering if the Chief was going to treat us like chew toys because the newbs had messed up. And if he did what recourse did we have to let it roll downhill and all over those that had caused his bad mood.
I’d taken Bam-Bam back from Chay and then helped him haul himself up off the ground. He winced and he wasn’t faking. I waited until the four of us were out of earshot of the group that Chief Jackson was now having for a pre-dinner snack and asked, “What hurts? And don’t say nothing or just growl.”
He growled anyway.
“Cute. Real cute. Seriously, if you don’t want Nurse Gilroy getting a view of your nether regions then let Cooper check whether you’re just shaken, stirred, or if there is legitimate breakage.”
He growled again.
“Want me to toss you in the bushes? Bet I could do it, especially if you’re hurt.”
He sighed and then said, “Just foot. Idiot drove over it.”
“Cooper?”
Cooper snorted a laugh. “Dude, just give in. The more you try and resist the worse she is going to get. And if she tosses you in the bushes I ain’t gonna be the one to dig you out.”
We’d arrived at Chief Jackson’s office and very reluctantly Chay started taking his boot off.
“Oh for … I’m practically hanging out for the world to see while I’m feeding Bam-Bam and you turn red as a beet and you haven’t even got a sock off yet.” I turned my back.
Dallas gave me a look and I asked, “What?”
“Doe … knock it off.”
“I’m not doing anything wrong!”
“We all have our … er … sensitivities.”
Having had enough I turned around and watched Chay try and hide his sockless foot real quickly. All three men then growled.
“E … nough,” I growled right back at them. “If I can put up with you and the rest of the flaming world seeing my facial scars then I don’t want to hear a doggone thing from you. Not to mention you obviously haven’t thought about the fact that to fix my face they had to take bits and pieces of me from other places on my body which means that my face isn’t the only place where I have scars. A couple of the bone grafts didn’t take the first time around so they had to go get more bone from the next place … hip, leg, and I even have a scar under my hair where they took some bone from my skull hoping that the proximity meant that my body would accept it better. I’ve got places where they had to take skin so that they could seal up my face … after more than one surgery you jerks. So, I get you have scars. I’m sorry you do because I know how it feels. But since I know how it feels you don’t have to treat me like I’ll barf or something. Look at me … there’s more than one reason that I’ll never …”
I stopped, surprised at what I’d almost said. I turned to stalk off, but Chief Jackson and Chief Madison were standing there trying to keep their faces blank. I fought an internal war but finally won. I’d embarrassed myself and it was a hard pill to swallow. Then Bam-Bam blew very wet raspberries all over my face. I was still holding him rather than put him in the sling.
“Thanks,” I told him sighing. “Your timing is impeccable as always.”
He laughed and bounced in my arms.
Rather than give me a hard time everyone let it pass. I ignored the three guys and followed Chief Madison when she beckoned me inside. That’s when I noticed she was carrying a canvas tote. She sat it down and I heard it clink.
“Help me get this organized. Quickly.”
I knew that the cleaners had just been in the room, so I put Bam-Bam down to crawl and then started helping Chief take these small bottles out of the bag. We lined them up by kind and then Chief Madison hit the intercom.
Chief Jackson walked in with the men and a bundle in his own hands. He looked at all four of us and said, “Shut up. Don’t say a word. The situation on The Farm is becoming fluid and may turn into a bug out event. Be prepared.”
I was completely shocked but Chay elbowed me and I closed my mouth with a snap. The bottles were from the box that had been broken open by the newbs. They were divided four ways. We were told to put them in our back packs and then secure them in our rooms in some way. Next Chief Jackson pulled out vacuum sealed packages of samples of the dried fruit, fruit paste, flours, and jerkeys that we’d been making. Those were also stuffed into our packs.
I didn’t know what to say and the three men said nothing either. The Chief settled it by saying, “Scram. Make good use of your time.”
I started walking out and Chief Madison said, “Doe?”
I turned back around and said, “Ma’am?”
“Where did you learn to drive unassisted?”
I smiled surprising everyone. “My dad. He always disabled the autopilots on all the gadgets and gizmos we had. He said people should have to learn how to drive things without autopilot before they were allowed to use it. Mom was the same way; you had to learn to do things what she called ‘long hand’ before you were allowed to use any shortcuts. I used to back the car out of the garage for him. And I could drive the riding lawnmower and stuff when …” My smiled faltered. “Then after … after he wasn’t with us anymore, I had to do it because Mom couldn’t. She … she got sick you see and …” I shook my head. “Anyway, that’s how I know. Is there anything else ma’am?”
“No. But the more you talk about them the more interesting your parents sound.”
I managed a small smile and said, “Yes ma’am. They were that and a lot more besides. May I go now?”
She nodded and said, “Dismissed.”
I was trying not to fall into a funk because I knew my parents would not have wanted good memories to do bad things to me, but it wasn’t easy.
Chay quietly asked, “S’ okay?”
“It will be. I don’t exactly have a choice.”
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Giving my thanks and I did wait for morning for a couple of your stories
larry_minn
Contributing Member
Not a good idea to check just before bed. Had to wait till morning break to finish chapters. So boyfriend/spouse killed floater, claimed accident but greenies put body on farm to cause trouble? I missed where she was disrespectful to judge. She just was more intuitive.
CHAPTER 34
We finished up lessons in June with a rotation in The Farm’s domestic gardens and apiary. I suppose on some level I knew that an apiary is a place they keep bees but since I’d never really seen one up close and personal realizing that I would get to see a bee farm was exciting.
I wasn’t allowed to bring Bam-Bam in on the lesson. Understandable I suppose but it did create a bit of a mess. On the other hand, turns out that Chay is mildly allergic to bees and Nurse Gilroy nixed that part of his weekly lesson. His throat doesn’t seize up or anything these days, but he used to carry an epi-pen when he was younger, and the reactions could be pretty bad. Now the sting-site just really swells up and tries to get infected, especially if it is an Africanized bee which are pretty common.
It felt really strange not to have Bam-Bam with me, or even close by, and at first I was so nervous it was hard to concentrate. The Chief in charge of the Ag program at The Farm was named Chief Benedict.
“Is there a problem Trainee McCormick?”
“No Sir Chief Benedict. I … I’ve just never been this far away from my baby before and … and …” I took a deep breath and stood straighter and finished, “I beg your pardon Sir. I … I’m having an … adjustment reaction. I’m getting it under control. Sir.”
“Hmph,” he said with a derisive sniff causing a few snickers from the other trainees around me. “I’ve been told something that’s pretty damn unbelievable. Seems you can drive untethered to an autopilot.”
On surer ground I said, “Yes Sir. I can Sir.”
“Hmph. Get to that Farm-All and back it up to the trailer so it can be hitched.”
“Yes Sir.”
I could tell he was trying to rattle me. What I had ever done to him to get on his “list” I hadn’t figured out at the time, but I wasn’t going to stand around waiting for the reasons to add up.
I’d never driven anything as big as the Farm-All. Dallas asked me, “You got this?”
“Sure,” I answered, trying to project some confidence. I figured the sooner the lesson was over the sooner I could get back to Bam-Bam. I ran over to the Farm-All, climbed in the cab and pushed the start button. I gave the dash and pedals a good once over and ignored the catcalls for taking longer than they thought I should. The Farm-All might have been bigger than what I had driven before but the controls were so similar that I began to calm. In only a few minutes I had the Farm-All turned around and backed into the trailer, luckily without too much trouble.
I felt the trailer attach and then a guy jumped in the cab and directed, “Slow and steady. The trailer has hive supers on it and we are going to deposit them in the fields.”
That meant nothing to me at the time so I just did as I was told. I saw Dallas and Cooper in a transporter that was pacing me and once I was directed to stop but not turn the engine off I saw that the trainees in the other truck, under the supervision of Chief Benedict, would take so many of these things that were basically condos for bees and place them in different locations I was told to drive to; vegetable gardens, orchards, and fields of flowers. After the trailer was emptied of the “supers” I was directed to drive back to the staging area and park.
Chief Benedict eyed me like I was a new species and he wasn’t sure what to make of me … or was re-evaluating me or something. It was a little disconcerting but not something I hadn’t felt before, it just made me wonder even more how I’d pee’d in his snow cone in the first place.
“All right, listen up. From here we’re going to the honey barn. Not to be confused with a honey wagon.” I didn’t get the supposed joke but everyone else did. I hate when that happens. “Don’t touch anything. It must be kept sanitary. Once you are issued your gloves you will partner with an Ag Trainee and you will follow their instructions.”
As luck would have it, I was partnered with a woman that acted like she wouldn’t spit on me if I was on fire. But she at least did her part so I could do mine and pass that part of the lesson.
“Yeah, so listen,” she said. “My grade isn’t going down because you’re stupid. But I ain’t repeating myself and I will find you and pay you back if you cause me any grief. Got it chicklet?”
“Whatever. Will I need to write this down?”
“Huh?”
“Is this going to be complicated? Do I need to write this down?”
“Yeah. You don’t seem like you’ve got all that much going on upstairs considering you’re always in trouble.”
“I am not always in trouble.”
“Sure, sure. Your reputation has proceeded you so just keep whatever problems you have to yourself. None of us need any of your crap.”
Rather than complain about injustice of being accused without knowing the crime, I pulled out my tablet and proceeded to jot down what she explained.
“First comes the frames. Then comes the super. Your average super has 9 to 10 frames inside it. The average hive is made up of three to four supers. Each super can produce 20 to 30 pounds of honey so that means …”
“If a hive has three supers then it will get 60 to 90 pounds per hive per harvest.”
“Very good,” she said like she was talking to a frog who suddenly showed it could talk. “And here on The Farm there are three harvests per year per hive … spaced June to about September depending on the weather, how well the field or orchard produced flowers, and the overall health of the hive. Depending on the crop The Farm places three to four hives per acre though calling it ‘per acre’ don’t explain it because bees fly all over the hell and back but that’s a good average.”
She was waiting for me to respond so I said, “Okay … three harvests per acre and every acre has three hives … 9 x 20 to 9 x 30 … so that means every acre here at The Farm produces 180 to 270 pounds of honey. How many pounds per gallon is there?”
“The ballpark figure is about 12 pounds per gallon.”
“Holy crap! That’s 15 to 22 or so gallons of honey per acre! Those freakin’ little bumbles really work their stingers off.”
My yelp of surprise had been heard by the others including Chief Benedict. “Is she giving you problems Mayhew?”
“Er … no Sir Chief. She’s …” Then she snorted a laugh. “She’s strange but she’s all right.”
“Then what’s the noise?”
I saw Dallas and Cooper come up and shake their heads. “She gets over excited about weird crap,” Cooper said morosely. “What was it this time Minnow?”
“Hey!” When they just looked at me I asked, “Well have you heard how much those bees make? Fifteen to over twenty gallons per acre. And Chief Jackson said the ag section of The Farm is 80 acres. That’s freakin’ more than 1200 gallons … GALLONS … of honey!”
Dallas smiled indulgently. “You do love you some math. Now tone it back a bit before everyone doesn’t just think you’re crazy, they’ll know it.”
“But 1200 gallons times 12 pounds per gallon is over fourteen thousand pounds and …”
“Yeah?” Dallas said like he was being indulgent.
“Aw c’mon guys … that’s a lot of freakin’ honey. Can you imagine how many of those little honey bears that would fill up on the grocery store shelves?!”
Trainee Mayhew rolled her eyes and said, “We don’t sell it that way. We store it in 55-gallon drums.” Smiling nostalgically, “Though the first time I saw that stuff all stacked up in the honey barn I got that kind of excited too.”
“It’s like liquid gold,” I told her still amazed. “Dallas? How much is honey per pound these days?”
Dallas still knew his stuff and quoted a price and then I worked out the per ounce then multiplied it back out and I just stood there blinking. “Wow.”
Then I heard a familiar voice. “Maybe your next assignment should be on a supply depot.”
I turned and tried not to stand there with my mouth hanging open. “Chief Haygood?! What happened? Are you all right?! You look like … not good.”
“Getting blown up will do that.”
I sensed that both Dallas and Cooper tensed and became very focused like they sensed danger and were looking for it. Then Chief Jackson limped into view. “Oh now, this ain’t right,” I said on a grumble. “This ain’t right at all.” I went towards the two men and I suppose I surprised them by dragging over two lawn chairs at the same time.
Obviously not 100% Chief Jackson said, “Down McCormick. We’re bent, not broken.”
“Calm down he says looking all singed and bruised up,” I muttered soto voice. “Bet Mrs. Chief Jackson will have a thing or three to say about that I bet.”
“She already has. From her hospital bed. She got thrown in the initial blast and bruised her kidneys. That’s what I’m coming to tell you lot. Where’s Trahern?”
I turned spotted where he’d anxiously been watching from, and jogged over. “There’s no bees that I can see so you better come over. Some things happened.”
He handed me Bam-Bam. He sprinted over but I had to follow more slowly or risk an upchucking baby. When I got there I hung in the background because I knew I’d be more likely to hear what was going on. If they had to pay too much attention to me, they’d probably close ranks. It had happened enough times in the past that I’d learned to maneuver around it. Or thought I had.
“Come around here McCormick,” Chief Jackson said. “I’ve already told the men but for a week or more lessons are going to be held in or near my office. There may be times I farm you out. You won’t lose points … but don’t give me reason to reconsider it. Morning training …”
“We can do practice drills. Dallas knows the counts and the newbs can’t be allowed to backslide. We’ll herd them through big group and then herd them back. Cooper can do his checking up thing so you don’t have to haul yourself down to the Clinic. And when Mrs. Chief Jackson gets out of the hospital … if she comes to visit I can help with that. I took care of my mother before Hospice kicked in. And then I helped with … my step-grandmother’s husband. I’ve pretty much seen it all. Done it all. For study hall I can bring Chief Lark’s assignments and work on them in the Lounge.”
“If you’re through arranging my life, ya mind if I get a word in edgewise?” he asked mildly.
I sighed, realizing I might have over reacted. He looked at Chay and said, “Keep her from blowing a fuse. Dallas, set the rotations. Cooper …”
When I saw Cooper trying not to smile and then saw Chay and Dallas and Chief Haygood doing the same thing I gave Chief the squinty eye. He snorted then winced. “She’s coming home tomorrow assuming no complications. Bring your flame-retardant drawers. And do nothing to upset her. Got it?”
“Yes Sir, Chief.” But honestly I was relieved he wasn’t really upset.
It was Chief Haygood that said, “Make sure and take your tablet. You will still be required to complete all assignments in a timely manner. I also expect that project to be finished by its due date if not before.”
“Yes Sir, Chief,” I repeated, this time directing my reply to Chief Haygood.
Chief Benedict said wryly, “If we are finished with interruptions, I still have a course to run.”
We got back at it with Chay, holding a baby that had obviously been eating green beans again, staying with the two Chiefs while the rest of us went towards a large, temperature-controlled shed. How did I know that he’d been eating green beans? Because there were bits skewered on Chay’s spiky flat top and smeared all over Wubbie Duck turning the yellow to a nauseating color of green I preferred not to try and name.
In the Bee Barn we learned about collecting the frames from the supers and then how to extract the honey from the frames. That part was sorta fun to be honest. You take a heated knife and run it down one side of the frame “uncapping” the beeswax sealed cells of honey. Then you load the frames into what is basically a merri-go-round … a centrifugal force spinner. The ones the farm used were solar powered because of the amount of honey they processed but many smaller operations still use the hand-crank versions. As the frames are spun the honey gets slung out onto the walls of the barrel they are spinning inside … like what happens if you get on a Gravitron ride at the fair too soon after eating. From the sides of the barrel the honey drips down into a collector and from the collector it is pumped into the storage barrels that are then sealed and stored in a temperature-controlled storage room. The temperature-controlled part is more about FDA rules of food storage than anything else. Honey doesn’t spoil … unless something is intentionally put in there like sugar water or stuff like that to thin it out and make it go further.
We were finished with the lesson just in time for me to get to Chay who was being eaten alive by one frustrated Bam-Bam.
“Sorry,” I said taking him and going over to a tree to sit down with my back to everyone.
“S’okay,” Chay said with the closest thing he gives to a chuckle.
Chay did his “standing guard” thing and I asked him. “Did he get you with his pearlies?”
“Not after I … let go … faster.”
“Learned the trick did you?” I said trying not to laugh. “I’ve got a baby shark. Or beaver.” But as I did I started feeling a little sad.
He must have heard something in my voice because he asked, “What?”
I knew better than to tell him nothing. He’s got the knack for waiting me out. Quietly so no one else heard I answered, “He’s getting so big. He won’t need me … not much longer.”
“Always will,” he said just as quietly
“No. Not always. And not like this. Maybe for a while yet but … but … not forever.”
“Will be okay. Maybe … er … others … uh …”
I snorted. “I’m not counting on it.” Feeling a little something or other I said, “No one else should count on it with me. Tomorrow isn’t promised and today is a gawd blessed mess. Let’s just drop it before someone hears and thinks we’re fraternizing. We don’t need that kind of hassle.”
He obliged me and when Bam-Bam was finished I buttoned up and got up and turned to find that a lot of people were staring without staring.
A little embarrassed I asked, “What? Never seen a kid get fed before?”
Cooper laughed and said, “Ain’t that. It’s that you aren’t the freaky little monster word had said you were.”
“Word? Is that a person, place, or thing? Give me a legit name and then we can have civilized discourse on the topic. Otherwise, big freakin’ deal. I gotta go clean up the eating machine before roll call at the mess hall. After that I have a freakton of sewing I have to finish for Chief Lark.”
“Not going to fire?” Chay asked.
I groaned. “There’s a bonfire tonight?” The three men nodded. “Well that’s just great. Chief Delray said if I miss another one it would be a demerit. How the heck am I supposed to be two places at the same time?”
I was in the middle of trying to mentally rearrange my schedule when something hit me in the back of my head and I went down to my knees.
“Doe?!”
Lucky for us Chief Benedict just happened to walk out of the bee barn and looked in our direction when it happened otherwise being dragged off to the side of the trail by three guys who couldn’t decide whether to cover me or turn into a wolf pack and find who did it would have looked pretty bad. And suddenly three Chiefs were there and I heard Jackson say, “Go! Get the sumbitch.”
I was angrier about Bam-Bam getting scared – he was clinging to me with eyes big and round rather than crying – than I was about getting pegged. I put my hand on the back of my head and came away with blood. “What the?”
“Stop trying to move Trainee, whatever it was left a pretty good gash.”
“I am so not shaving my head for stitches. Just give me something to put direct pressure on it.”
“I’ll put a damn tourniquet on it … and run it across your mouth too … if you don’t be still right the hell now.”
Since Chief Jackson sounded more than a little peeved I thought it would be a good idea to do just that. It wasn’t five minutes later when Chay comes back dragging some guy and I realize he looks a little familiar. And then I realize who it is. So does Chief Haygood for some reason. “Perez, Jorge. Wash out at the beginning of the semester.”
I turned to look and realize he is speaking into some kind of sat phone. That’s when it registers that things are starting to get fuzzy around the edges. “Sorry Chief. Need … need to sit down.”
My knees give out and someone catches me before I hit the ground but I can’t seem to stop shaking. I hear, “Bring her over here Chay. She’s looking shock-y.” That was Cooper. Someone tries to take Bam-Bam from me and I nearly shriek.
“S’okay. Easy. Stay Cooper. Bams right here.” I can tell he moved because he said, “Coop?”
“There’s grit in the cut but I don’t want to start fooling with it here. Will Bams start chewing on me you think if I carry him and you carry her?”
“Put sling on me. Can carry both.”
“You sure?”
I didn’t hear a reply so Chay probably gave him a nod or look or something. What I did hear were people wondering why Cooper didn’t carry me while Chay carried Bam-Bam. I heard different answers in return but the one that stood out was when I heard Jen’s voice say, “Personal space issues. She don’t like being touched. Now move so we can help.”
“Oh brother,” I muttered. “What’s the big fr..fr..friggin’ deal? And why do I sound s…s…s…so funny?”
“Shock,” Cooper answered absently. “How many fingers am I holding up?”
“None. That’s your thu…thu…thumb.”
“Good answer,” he said sounding relieved. “Now be still and don’t wiggle or Chay will drop you on your head and you really will wind up with scrambled brains. It’s going to be hard enough to tell how scrambled you are as it is.”
“K..kiss..s..s..s my left big t..t..toe Jerk.”
We arrived at the Clinic right about then and then I see out of the corner of my eye Judge Haygood is already there ahead of us and looking none too pleased about it. Seeing the hate in his eyes I gave an involuntary shiver.
CHAPTER 35 - 1
“You are not washing that young woman out,” I heard Chief Haygood say in a heated whisper. “There is no logical justification for it. Considering her circumstances her attitude is exactly what we want of a trainee. As for this latest mess, just because she is near an Incident does not mean she has been a participant or guilty of anything. And the attack was from behind. Three chiefs saw what happened, as did multiple trainees, and she did nothing to deserve or cause it. The perpetrator is a washout from early on that should have been long gone. And how he got beyond your security protocols is a question that needs to be answered and swiftly.”
“I will do whatever the **** I …”
“No, you won’t. Not this time Marshall. And moderate your tone,” said a third voice, one I recognized as the Haygood family lawyer from the “floater incident.”
The judge hissed in irritation, “Whose side are you on?!”
“The side of this family and the Haygood Foundation. I’m more than a little insulted you would even ask. I’m already having to cover the fact that you have financially created a mess. And if her guardian gets involved …”
“Hmph. Little pissant lawyer from some backwater practice. Who the hell does he think he is?”
“I said keep your voice down. You are retired, and this isn’t your courtroom. But if you don’t control yourself you may find yourself in one and drag the rest of the family in with you. If the trainee finds out the man is still alive and taking an active interest in her she could try and make contact with him. There are things you do not want looked at too closely.”
“She doesn’t have access to communication.”
“But he does. And if he finds out you’ve been waylaying those attempts at communication of his …”
Chief Haygood muttered, “What the hell? Just what is going on? Why wasn’t this cleared through Committee? And why am i just now hearing of It? This is borderline … more than borderline … just what the hell kind of mess are we in?!”
There was silence and then the lawyer said, “I know Felix, try and remain calm. Several of us are just coming into some of the more … unpleasant … facts of this situation. As for the accounting issues, Rita has been reassigned. And Perry in Sat Link has been sent to Atlanta. All the staff in certain areas are being moved around in order to try and head off any accusations of fraud, or worse.”
The judge growled, “How dare you do anything with my staff without my approval!”
“They aren’t your law clerks Marshall; they are employees of the Foundation. And by using them you’ve drawn all of us into this. Face it, you made a mistake. Some of us are willing to try and smooth this over but none of us are going to go down for you, or with you. We are mitigating what can be mitigated for our sakes as much as yours. You’ve exacerbated your mistakes by trying to cover them up. Thankfully we were able to put the money back in the trust and blame it on an accounting error that has now been rectified. You should have come to the family when that loan was called due, not … what you did. And for God’s sake, please tell me there isn’t anything else out there. More surprises we don’t need at this juncture … or at all. All of these ‘favors’ people are now calling in are bad enough.”
There was some noise from another part of the clinic and the men moved off. The room I had woken up in was dim, but not so dim I didn’t see Bam Bam asleep in a bassinet beside the bed. I knew the bang to my head hadn’t been that hard … hard enough but not that hard … so I was confused why I was feeling like this. About that time Cooper strolled purposefully in looking at a chart, presumably mine.
“Okay, so what’s going on this time?” I croaked out weakly.
He stopped short at my question and then got a big grin on his face then quickly drew his finger across his mouth and mimed me closing my eyes. I did it without thinking just because who knows why. About that time I hear the men coming back down the hall. And they weren’t alone.
There were several sets of feet, at least one of which was wearing a pair of heels that clicked on the tile floor. Then a female voice asked, “Gentleman, am I given to understand that you sedated someone with a recent head injury? What medical authority ordered this?”
I heard Nurse Gilroy fly by on her broom and say, “It wasn’t any of our regular staff I can assure you Agent. Someone from town was here. I have a copy of his credentials If you want them. However, for specific details you’ll have to ask him; I was not allowed in the exam room.” The outrage was out for everyone to hear.
There was a big fat silence for a moment and I would have liked to have opened my eyes to see their faces. Nurse Gilroy takes her job too seriously some days, but you don’t cross her either. And you don’t interfere with any of those under her care. For better or worse Gilroy took a special interest in Bam-Bam and I. And apparently, she is fairly oblivious about certain things because …
“Not allowed in the exam room?” The other woman asked, her voice now strangely familiar. Then it clicked. She was the federal agent that questioned me.
“Balderdash,” the Judge huffed.
Nurse Gilroy’s broom went from idle to drive just that fast. “Judge I know Doctor Caruthers is a personal friend of yours, but the man didn’t even bother checking Trainee McCormick’s medical chart prior to administering his … unorthodox treatment. And where he came up with that particular sedative I don’t know because It isn’t something we stock because of its strength. Worse still, he failed to update her chart notes concerning how much he administered. I’m becoming concerned that she hasn’t shown any sign of waking up yet. I may call in Dr. Patel.”
The Judge started to say something but Lawyer Haygood interrupted and said, “Do what you think is best Nurse Gilroy and please call my secretary if there is anything else that comes up. We are trying to ascertain if anything else occurred between the two trainees.”
Cooper decided to add his two cents which part of me worried about and wanted to tell him to not stick his neck out. “Begging your pardon Mr. Haygood but nothing happened between them. It was the cousin that threatened to kill Doe and her baby. That was the first time we were introduced to the Judge and all the security measures around The Farm. As I understand it Jaime - the cousin - was a three striker so he’s in jail some place. Jorge just got washed out for tripping someone in the Mess Hall and wasting a bunch of food. There’s another Perez, female, that I don’t really know but she hangs out with the landscape and construction trainees. We all came up on the same people mover from Florida.”
I heard Chief Haygood say, “That will be enough Trainee. Return to your duty station.” He used a mild tone, but it was nevertheless obvious he expected immediate obedience.
“Yes Sir,” Cooper said smartly before I heard him walk in my direction.
“I said your duty station.”
“Yes Sir. This Is it. I’m monitoring McCormick’s pulse. Um … and begging your pardon again, but could you … er … If the baby wakes up he’s going to want to get fed and there’s already been one ruckus over that. I’ll notify Nurse Gilroy immediately if McCormick wakes up on my shift.”
The Agent said, “Nurse Gilroy? A few questions please … but let’s move this down the hall.”
I was trying to decide if I was going to wake up or not when very quietly Cooper asks, “You awake?”
“Sorta. Whatever I was knocked out with … carries a wallop.”
“Yea it do. And before you get upset, Chay fed and watered Bams and was finally convinced to crash and burn. He’s propped himself up in a couple of chairs in the waiting area. He was getting a little too protective so he’s put himself in timeout if you can believe that. Nurse Gilroy was impressed. That Agent, she knew how to handle him; his voice gave out before his nerves, but he still ain’t one hundred percent.”
“So, I really did see one of the Perez cousins and he really pegged me in the head with something.”
“Big ass rock. But it was only a glancing blow or you would have had some serious damage.”
“Did … did they cut my hair?”
I heard him mutter fee-males like we were a strange bird. “A little but not much,” he finally answered. “Gash wasn’t as bad as it looked. You’re just a bleeder. Only took a couple of staples to stop the bleeding. And Bams is fine, just tired. Chay’s been playing with him for a couple of hours to keep him from freaking.”
“Ok. Um … I’m having a hard time staying awake but I think there is something going on so I need you guys to explain it to me … later. ‘K?”
“Er … we’ll talk about It. How about you just focus on sleeping off the drugs first.”
And that’s what I did. Next time I woke up it was the wee hours of the morning and I was feeding Bam-Bam before anyone noticed.
“Doe!”
“Hey Chay,” I responded, trying not to yawn in his face. It was the buttcrack of dawn and despite that a little later than I normally woke up.
He came close and really looked hard at me before relaxing. “Feeling better.”
“Never felt bad, just shaky. Don’t know what put me down and out. But thanks for being there for Bam-Bam.” When he looked surprised I told him, “No way would it have been anyone else. Just tell me you didn’t get in trouble for it.”
He shook his head. “Whole place on lockdown. Feds crawling everywhere.”
“Why?”
He looked momentarily flummoxed but then one of the staff rushes in, looks at Chay and says, “Might as well explain. I’m gonna send someone to notify Nurse Gilroy in Staff Meeting. Assuming I can get authorization from Colonel Cranky Pants.”
She walked out and I said, “Do I want to know who this Cranky Pants is?”
Chay snorted and dragged a chair over to sit. He no longer got embarrassed while I was feeding Bam-Bam but he rarely openly stared like he was doing. “Uh …”
“Okay?”
“Yeah, Bam-Bam seems his normal piggy little self. That’s how I knew you had to be the one taking care of him.”
“Not … not Bams. You. You okay?”
“Oh. Uh … yeah. Just … look … I’ve been afraid to touch it but … but how much hair did they cut? Is it a great big bald spot? Cooper said no but … he’s Cooper.”
Chay understood what I meant and answered, “Only very little. Staples instead of stitches. Hurt?”
“Not all that much. Probably’ll hurt more later but then it will hurt less. So … feds huh.”
And with that he explained and by the time he was finished so was Bam-Bam. He had to get up and get some water while he explained but he still managed to get it all out without completely losing his voice.
Basically there were two competing refugee groups on the land surrounding The Farm. They were supposed to be going to a pick-up point to be taken out west to a work farm for temporary resettlement but the movers carrying them got held up waiting their turn at a charging station. Then there was some kind of riot at the station which was really crowded and during that there were a lot of escapees because it seems that these people weren’t exactly being “resettled” willingly.
They were a big group and local law enforcement had their hands full with other stuff going on that we here on The Farm had been insulated from because intentionally. Nothing like finding out the world has been moving on without you and you suddenly have to catch up, only you don’t really have a clue what is going on. The local stuff going on was considered a “distraction from our training” and the national and international stuff even more so. Maybe so but it makes me wonder how many trainees walk out into a world that used to be one thing and was suddenly another, making it harder than it had to be to acclimate to whatever job they were assigned.
The big picture went something like this … instead of coming to the States, people were now trying to emigrate out of the States and it was those on our northern and southern borders complaining we weren’t doing enough to keep people from traveling illegally. Quite the flip from the way things used to be. People crossing were getting shot and it was a political mess and made the war the world was in just that much more chaotic and nearly incomprehensible to people like me.
What made it local for the locals is that a lot of the people that couldn’t “go home” or that had been displaced by the storms, or economic problems caused by the storms, just sort of wandered around creating havoc. That’s when the feds started more seriously rounding them up and since it was a death sentence simply to toss them over the border … it was off to work farms and refugee camps where they had to earn their keep. And no one wanted to go there because basically you entered those gates, you were processed and if you had any sort of criminal record - Juvie to traffic to more serious - you were separated out for an even stricter camp.
So anyway, there was a big group that suddenly thought they had some cojones and decided they would just take whatever they needed. Then Tweedle Dum Perez somehow connects up with the group - now groups plural because of infighting - because he wasn’t part of them originally and says there’s food and anything you could need at The Farm. Let’s go take it. Basically a revenge move for getting washed out. Him taking a shot at me was icing on the cake … though later I found out more but like I said, that was later.
“We’re surrounded,” Chay said before another sip of water.
“Well geez, aren’t you all calm and junk,” I told him trying to prove I was just as calm when in truth what was happening was beginning to sink in, in part because I had expected someone from Staff to arrive by then and things were eerily quiet when I knew they should have been hopping because of breakfast. What I had overheard the night before was also floating around in the back of my mind waiting to have its own brain time to be dealt with. I had lots of thoughts simply cued up waiting their turn to freak me out.
Something must have showed on my face because Chay patted my hand and said, “‘S okay. You and Bams safe.”
“I know that. You’re here. I just mean big picture stuff. Finding out all that stuff is going on and … I don’t know … suddenly faced with the reality of it.”
He was giving me a strange look then said, “‘S okay. They don’t really want fight … just food. Stripped a field before they were run off by Farm security team. Feds trying to talk them into peacefully give up. If not that smart, the feds will get them anyway only more painful … for everyone. Trying to keep other activists from using them is bigger problem. Lots of people want a say on this.”
“Ugh. Any little kids in either group?”
“Not these. Some in other areas.”
I let him fall silent because I could tell he was talked out and explaining things to me hadn’t been easy. But after a moment I couldn’t put It off.
“Can you watch Bam-Bam for a sec? Gotta … do the girl thing and …”
He took Bam-Bam who was happy to go and I tried to get out of the bed without showing anything vital and going over to the room where the toilet and sink was. My bladder thanked me, and I washed up a bit and came out to find Nurse Gilroy and someone carrying a large tablet, the type I recognized was for a recorded interview since I’d had to do one for family court in the past.
Chapter 35 - 2
While Nurse Gilroy fussed over my vitals I was asked a series of questions, all of them pretty routine, which I answered until they kept asking me what happened afterwards.
“I don’t remember.”
“What is the last thing you do remember?”
“Sounding like a stupid cartoon character every time I tried to talk, while Chay carried us to the Clinic. But I don’t remember actually getting here or anything until I came to this morning when both Bam-Bam and I needed what we needed.”
“Excuse me?”
“Bam-Bam was hungry and I needed to feed him.”
“Er … fine. Back to what you remember from the incident.”
I was asked the same questions multiple times in multiple ways and when they couldn’t shake any kind of different answer out of me, they said to be prepared to answer more questions at a later date. I was simply thrilled I tell you. My head was starting to hurt but I wasn’t allowed even an aspirin until they could figure out if all the other drug was out of my system.
About an hour later, on top of the thumping in my brain pan, I was starting to get sick to my stomach hungry. I’d gotten used to eating regularly. Suddenly Jan and Jen run in. They were dragging Mari with them.
“Duck and Cover. Those crazies are attacking the farm and there are a lot more of them than anyone thought.”
Chay immediately changed. He went from being my friend Chay into this … this … I guess who he had to become when he saw action in the military.
“Location of Dallas and Coop?” He growled out.
“Heading to Chief Jackson’s. His wife came in early this morning and neither of them are looking too good. You need to go then go, we got this.”
He looked at them, then at me and said, “Stay safe. Need you to …”
“You too. And I mean it. Or else.”
He nodded and then turned and hurried to the outside. When he opened the door a tidal wave of sound rolled in. I started scrambling around opening cabinet doors until I found what I was looking for.
“Doe! What are you doing?”
“In case you haven’t noticed I’m not exactly dressed for a battle zone.” I started pulling on my clothes that had been folded and shoved in a drawer. Next came the sling and then my daily BOB … at least It did after I grabbed up some nappies and a few other things and shoved It In there with the rest of my stuff. Then there was a crash against the wall and with that went a couple of windows.
“Anyone know where the rest of the Staff is at?”
‘Holdup down the hall.”
‘Where the sound of breaking glass came from?” I asked getting more than a little worried.
‘Yes. And do not even think ... dammit … Doe! Come back here you …”
But it wasn’t them who caught me, it was Mari. “Keep Smiles down.”
I realized she was talking about Bam-Bam. “Stay with the Sisters. I’ll get the others. Just be prepared for blood.”
Jan and Jen both grabbed a side and pulled me back into the room I had tried to exit. “Did you tell her?”
“No,” said Jan with Jen adding, “She’s starting to remember. They said she never would.”
“Uh …”
“Sister from another mother.”
“Okay, this is just getting freaking weird.”
“Try being in our shoes,” one of them whispered. “At least our mothers weren’t crazy. Goldie got it coming and going …her mother and our father who had some kind of prophet complex and believed he was seeding the world to grow Gaia’s army. Goldie had a breakdown barely into her teens after her mom dragged her into one too many battles. She forgot everyone and because of some damage she suffered, the docs said she wouldn’t get it back. And the fix she got at eighteen? The grands’ way of making sure whatever her mother had didn’t get another generation. They didn’t want whatever it is to dirty their gene pool anymore.”
“Ew. And TMI. Geez.”
I was struggling for something to say when Mari is back with Nurse Gilroy and a couple of others. We mopped them up, patched them up while taking instructions from Nurse Gilroy who herself was suffering her own damage, were considering our next move when the sound outside changes. It becomes less like a troop of rampaging baboons and more like buffalos on the run.
I felt like a whack a mole game piece because every time I tried to pop up to see what was going on someone would push my head back down. Eventually I put enough of their details together to at least form a picture. The refugees had been running amok with impunity, stripping every building they could get into - and the reason they hadn’t been able to get into this one was because of the wired plexiglass instead of glass, and because the safety doors sealed, something I hadn’t known they could do but apparently something that Gilroy had pulled the handle on shortly after Chay had exited the building. About the only building they hadn’t bothered with was the dorms because they knew there wouldn’t be anything valuable in there. Or that’s what they assumed based on Perez’s description. Of course, I sweated it until I found that out later. All I owned was in the bed storage cabinet … all Bam-Bam and I owned. The Idea of losing it to a bunch of creeps was not appealing at all.
Anyway, the reason why the noise changed is because the feds had had enough. Being pelted with rocks and whatever else they were throwing is one thing. When they started throwing Molotov cocktails is when the signal was given to return fire … but it wasn’t with spit balls. They started with rubber bullets, but then live ammo came into play for some reason. Now that put the refugees on the run. But the refugee groups started shooting back too and no one has yet to find out where they got that many guns.
Most of the feds were veterans of the economic and political riots of the last decade or so; and, if not that they were war veterans. Of course, it turned out some of the “refugees” were as well. In fact, about three-quarters of the “refugees” turned out to be out of area agitators that were treating the real refugees like useful idiots. But when they were down and bleeding, they weren’t that easy to tell apart, so it took investigators in hindsight to peel back the layers.
I tell you that is the day that Nurse Gilroy must have found her stuffing. She may have been in shock the night that Cassie died but if a Staff or Fed fell anywhere near the Clinic, and a reasonable attempt could be made to get to them, her Staff and Jan, Jen, and Mari would go out and get them and drag them back. I don’t know why I hadn’t seen the likeness before but with Jan and Jen letting their hair grow out and dropping a few pounds you could see that they and Mari shared a lot of similar physical characteristics. I didn’t know what that boded for the three women and honestly didn’t have time to really think about it at the time. I wasn’t allowed to leave the Clinic so was in the thick of helping those that had been brought in.
Hardly any of them were minor injuries. Most were life-threatening. Honestly, they would have been triaged but Nurse Gilroy was having none of that. The one thing we didn’t have was a blood supply. All we could do was try to get the bleeding stopped or under control and keep them from going into shock. I hoped to never again see so much styptic powder, wound-seal, and quik-clot. That hope wasn’t fulfilled but at the time I still had an innocence that is difficult to believe, even for me.
In the midst of it all Nurse Gilroy paid me a compliment that I still treasure. “If you weren’t in the entrepreneurial track, I’d give serious consideration to having you in medical. There has to be people that can be calm, take direction, and not be squeamish.”
I was helping to wrap a pretty serious leg wound on this female Fed and explained, “I had to learn a lot on the fly before Hospice stepped in with Momma. Even then she mostly only liked me for the more … intimate kinds of things.”
“And you yourself spent a lot of time under medical care.’
“Yes ma’am. I probably know what the inside of my face looks like as much as the doctors did. Is this tight enough or too tight?”
“Loosen it just a little. We want there to be direct pressure but we don’t want to stop the blood flow to the rest of the leg. And elevate it a couple of more inches but slowly.”
In the end we had about two dozen people crammed into the Clinic. I went off to feed Bam-Bam several times because there was no baby food for him. He was still starving, and I was sore, when the guys stumbled in our direction bringing Chief and Mrs. Jackson. Mrs. Chief Jackson was woozy, but in a hacked off lioness kind of way, so I left her to Nurse Gilroy that had more pull than me. Chief Jackson was in rough shape but somehow he imagined he had enough energy to stop me from taking care of him.
“Don’t even think about it Chief. Your ours. We take care of ours. Not to mention I promised Mrs. Chief Jackson that your bandages would get changed … and I did it so she would agree to stop fussing long enough for Nurse Gilroy to do for her what she needed. Now you don’t want to set her off do you?” All the while I was getting him out of his shirt whether he wanted it or not. Guys do not seem to realize that once a female has learned to wrestle a cranky baby in and out of clothes that there’s pretty much nothing they can’t do.
“Yours huh?” He huffed finally giving in when I had the shirt three-quarters off.
“Yes Sir. Our Chief. Dallas is second. Chay Is muscle. Cooper is medical. I’m the sheep you all get to practice on, and I make sure you don’t get too serious and get cracked in the process. Right now, Cooper has to give Nurse Gilroy and her staff a hand so they don’t get cracked. That leaves me to do what I can do since apparently I’m not allowed to fight.”
Too many voices said “No!” At the same time. I looked at him, rolled my eyes, and said, “See what i mean?”
He snorted and then was silent as I cleaned his Injuries from the explosion where sweat and other stuff had soaked into his bandages. I realized then that I hadn’t heard the details about that, and I wondered if all of the insanity was somehow connected. Some of it was and some of it wasn’t but frankly not all of it mattered and I’m just now beginning to understand that … and accept it.
We were running out of first aid supplies. The Clinic wasn’t supposed to be some kind of battlefield unit, it didn’t even have a resident doctor. As it was, to clean up the guys I had to resort to terry towels and liquid soap from the bathroom. I nearly resorted to a baseball bat.
Dallas gave me a dirty look and a pretty nasty swear word and I’d had enough. “You know, I have to be nice to the Chief. You I can beat on with impunity and people will probably thank me. Now knock it off already. The example you are setting for Bam-Bam sucks Bigfoot’s buttocks. I know for a fact it isn’t modesty keeping that shirt on your bod so that means you got dinged up. Or would you like me to turn you over to Nurse Gilroy and her staff who at the moment are getting their jollies mummifying the last guy that gave them lip.”
I heard some wheezing and turned from Dallas to find Chay with his face in the crook of his elbow. I could just see his eyes and my worry bone stopped singing. “So, did something go down the wrong pipe or are you laughing?”
He grabbed his stomach and then started laughing. A real honest to goodness bark of laughter. He could only do it a couple of times because It obviously hurt his throat, but it left everyone that saw it stunned. Then he crawled over to me, patted me on the head, and gargled, “Stitch later. Need to check perimeter.”
“Hey!”
But they got quicker than I could stop them. I turned to look at Cooper as he tried to edge out and said, “You make sure they let you since they won’t let me.”
“Aye, aye! Capt. Bly!” He added right before his own escape.
I sighed and looked at the Chief and said, “Looks like you have me all to yourself Chief. Wanna try that getting mummified thing? Might get you some sympathy from Mrs. Chief.”
“My gawd,” he muttered before shaking his head.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
While Nurse Gilroy fussed over my vitals I was asked a series of questions, all of them pretty routine, which I answered until they kept asking me what happened afterwards.
“I don’t remember.”
“What is the last thing you do remember?”
“Sounding like a stupid cartoon character every time I tried to talk, while Chay carried us to the Clinic. But I don’t remember actually getting here or anything until I came to this morning when both Bam-Bam and I needed what we needed.”
“Excuse me?”
“Bam-Bam was hungry and I needed to feed him.”
“Er … fine. Back to what you remember from the incident.”
I was asked the same questions multiple times in multiple ways and when they couldn’t shake any kind of different answer out of me, they said to be prepared to answer more questions at a later date. I was simply thrilled I tell you. My head was starting to hurt but I wasn’t allowed even an aspirin until they could figure out if all the other drug was out of my system.
About an hour later, on top of the thumping in my brain pan, I was starting to get sick to my stomach hungry. I’d gotten used to eating regularly. Suddenly Jan and Jen run in. They were dragging Mari with them.
“Duck and Cover. Those crazies are attacking the farm and there are a lot more of them than anyone thought.”
Chay immediately changed. He went from being my friend Chay into this … this … I guess who he had to become when he saw action in the military.
“Location of Dallas and Coop?” He growled out.
“Heading to Chief Jackson’s. His wife came in early this morning and neither of them are looking too good. You need to go then go, we got this.”
He looked at them, then at me and said, “Stay safe. Need you to …”
“You too. And I mean it. Or else.”
He nodded and then turned and hurried to the outside. When he opened the door a tidal wave of sound rolled in. I started scrambling around opening cabinet doors until I found what I was looking for.
“Doe! What are you doing?”
“In case you haven’t noticed I’m not exactly dressed for a battle zone.” I started pulling on my clothes that had been folded and shoved in a drawer. Next came the sling and then my daily BOB … at least It did after I grabbed up some nappies and a few other things and shoved It In there with the rest of my stuff. Then there was a crash against the wall and with that went a couple of windows.
“Anyone know where the rest of the Staff is at?”
‘Holdup down the hall.”
‘Where the sound of breaking glass came from?” I asked getting more than a little worried.
‘Yes. And do not even think ... dammit … Doe! Come back here you …”
But it wasn’t them who caught me, it was Mari. “Keep Smiles down.”
I realized she was talking about Bam-Bam. “Stay with the Sisters. I’ll get the others. Just be prepared for blood.”
Jan and Jen both grabbed a side and pulled me back into the room I had tried to exit. “Did you tell her?”
“No,” said Jan with Jen adding, “She’s starting to remember. They said she never would.”
“Uh …”
“Sister from another mother.”
“Okay, this is just getting freaking weird.”
“Try being in our shoes,” one of them whispered. “At least our mothers weren’t crazy. Goldie got it coming and going …her mother and our father who had some kind of prophet complex and believed he was seeding the world to grow Gaia’s army. Goldie had a breakdown barely into her teens after her mom dragged her into one too many battles. She forgot everyone and because of some damage she suffered, the docs said she wouldn’t get it back. And the fix she got at eighteen? The grands’ way of making sure whatever her mother had didn’t get another generation. They didn’t want whatever it is to dirty their gene pool anymore.”
“Ew. And TMI. Geez.”
I was struggling for something to say when Mari is back with Nurse Gilroy and a couple of others. We mopped them up, patched them up while taking instructions from Nurse Gilroy who herself was suffering her own damage, were considering our next move when the sound outside changes. It becomes less like a troop of rampaging baboons and more like buffalos on the run.
I felt like a whack a mole game piece because every time I tried to pop up to see what was going on someone would push my head back down. Eventually I put enough of their details together to at least form a picture. The refugees had been running amok with impunity, stripping every building they could get into - and the reason they hadn’t been able to get into this one was because of the wired plexiglass instead of glass, and because the safety doors sealed, something I hadn’t known they could do but apparently something that Gilroy had pulled the handle on shortly after Chay had exited the building. About the only building they hadn’t bothered with was the dorms because they knew there wouldn’t be anything valuable in there. Or that’s what they assumed based on Perez’s description. Of course, I sweated it until I found that out later. All I owned was in the bed storage cabinet … all Bam-Bam and I owned. The Idea of losing it to a bunch of creeps was not appealing at all.
Anyway, the reason why the noise changed is because the feds had had enough. Being pelted with rocks and whatever else they were throwing is one thing. When they started throwing Molotov cocktails is when the signal was given to return fire … but it wasn’t with spit balls. They started with rubber bullets, but then live ammo came into play for some reason. Now that put the refugees on the run. But the refugee groups started shooting back too and no one has yet to find out where they got that many guns.
Most of the feds were veterans of the economic and political riots of the last decade or so; and, if not that they were war veterans. Of course, it turned out some of the “refugees” were as well. In fact, about three-quarters of the “refugees” turned out to be out of area agitators that were treating the real refugees like useful idiots. But when they were down and bleeding, they weren’t that easy to tell apart, so it took investigators in hindsight to peel back the layers.
I tell you that is the day that Nurse Gilroy must have found her stuffing. She may have been in shock the night that Cassie died but if a Staff or Fed fell anywhere near the Clinic, and a reasonable attempt could be made to get to them, her Staff and Jan, Jen, and Mari would go out and get them and drag them back. I don’t know why I hadn’t seen the likeness before but with Jan and Jen letting their hair grow out and dropping a few pounds you could see that they and Mari shared a lot of similar physical characteristics. I didn’t know what that boded for the three women and honestly didn’t have time to really think about it at the time. I wasn’t allowed to leave the Clinic so was in the thick of helping those that had been brought in.
Hardly any of them were minor injuries. Most were life-threatening. Honestly, they would have been triaged but Nurse Gilroy was having none of that. The one thing we didn’t have was a blood supply. All we could do was try to get the bleeding stopped or under control and keep them from going into shock. I hoped to never again see so much styptic powder, wound-seal, and quik-clot. That hope wasn’t fulfilled but at the time I still had an innocence that is difficult to believe, even for me.
In the midst of it all Nurse Gilroy paid me a compliment that I still treasure. “If you weren’t in the entrepreneurial track, I’d give serious consideration to having you in medical. There has to be people that can be calm, take direction, and not be squeamish.”
I was helping to wrap a pretty serious leg wound on this female Fed and explained, “I had to learn a lot on the fly before Hospice stepped in with Momma. Even then she mostly only liked me for the more … intimate kinds of things.”
“And you yourself spent a lot of time under medical care.’
“Yes ma’am. I probably know what the inside of my face looks like as much as the doctors did. Is this tight enough or too tight?”
“Loosen it just a little. We want there to be direct pressure but we don’t want to stop the blood flow to the rest of the leg. And elevate it a couple of more inches but slowly.”
In the end we had about two dozen people crammed into the Clinic. I went off to feed Bam-Bam several times because there was no baby food for him. He was still starving, and I was sore, when the guys stumbled in our direction bringing Chief and Mrs. Jackson. Mrs. Chief Jackson was woozy, but in a hacked off lioness kind of way, so I left her to Nurse Gilroy that had more pull than me. Chief Jackson was in rough shape but somehow he imagined he had enough energy to stop me from taking care of him.
“Don’t even think about it Chief. Your ours. We take care of ours. Not to mention I promised Mrs. Chief Jackson that your bandages would get changed … and I did it so she would agree to stop fussing long enough for Nurse Gilroy to do for her what she needed. Now you don’t want to set her off do you?” All the while I was getting him out of his shirt whether he wanted it or not. Guys do not seem to realize that once a female has learned to wrestle a cranky baby in and out of clothes that there’s pretty much nothing they can’t do.
“Yours huh?” He huffed finally giving in when I had the shirt three-quarters off.
“Yes Sir. Our Chief. Dallas is second. Chay Is muscle. Cooper is medical. I’m the sheep you all get to practice on, and I make sure you don’t get too serious and get cracked in the process. Right now, Cooper has to give Nurse Gilroy and her staff a hand so they don’t get cracked. That leaves me to do what I can do since apparently I’m not allowed to fight.”
Too many voices said “No!” At the same time. I looked at him, rolled my eyes, and said, “See what i mean?”
He snorted and then was silent as I cleaned his Injuries from the explosion where sweat and other stuff had soaked into his bandages. I realized then that I hadn’t heard the details about that, and I wondered if all of the insanity was somehow connected. Some of it was and some of it wasn’t but frankly not all of it mattered and I’m just now beginning to understand that … and accept it.
We were running out of first aid supplies. The Clinic wasn’t supposed to be some kind of battlefield unit, it didn’t even have a resident doctor. As it was, to clean up the guys I had to resort to terry towels and liquid soap from the bathroom. I nearly resorted to a baseball bat.
Dallas gave me a dirty look and a pretty nasty swear word and I’d had enough. “You know, I have to be nice to the Chief. You I can beat on with impunity and people will probably thank me. Now knock it off already. The example you are setting for Bam-Bam sucks Bigfoot’s buttocks. I know for a fact it isn’t modesty keeping that shirt on your bod so that means you got dinged up. Or would you like me to turn you over to Nurse Gilroy and her staff who at the moment are getting their jollies mummifying the last guy that gave them lip.”
I heard some wheezing and turned from Dallas to find Chay with his face in the crook of his elbow. I could just see his eyes and my worry bone stopped singing. “So, did something go down the wrong pipe or are you laughing?”
He grabbed his stomach and then started laughing. A real honest to goodness bark of laughter. He could only do it a couple of times because It obviously hurt his throat, but it left everyone that saw it stunned. Then he crawled over to me, patted me on the head, and gargled, “Stitch later. Need to check perimeter.”
“Hey!”
But they got quicker than I could stop them. I turned to look at Cooper as he tried to edge out and said, “You make sure they let you since they won’t let me.”
“Aye, aye! Capt. Bly!” He added right before his own escape.
I sighed and looked at the Chief and said, “Looks like you have me all to yourself Chief. Wanna try that getting mummified thing? Might get you some sympathy from Mrs. Chief.”
“My gawd,” he muttered before shaking his head.
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