WAR The Day my Dad disappeared

Skyraider

Skyraider

Senior Member
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
 
Kathy in FL

Kathy in FL

Administrator
_______________
Skyraider said:
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
Click to expand...
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
 
J

JeanCat

Veteran Member
Skyraider said:
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
Click to expand...
So very sorry!!
 
Skyraider

Skyraider

Senior Member
One would think by the age of 74, that I would get over it, but I never do. I was the oldest of four children. Back then it was stiff upper lip and make your Dad proud. I still have difficulty sharing or discussing it with others, always feel the tears well up. I shed a few this morning just discussing it with my wife. That’s how it is and there is no shame. It broke my Mom and caused the four of us kids to bond like steel, always had each other‘s back. We actually had quite an interesting life in some ways, traveling this country together and living together in some interesting places. My youngest brother came to live with me at 14 yrs of age, legal guardian, Mom couldn’t keep him in line. Mom herself eventually turned to alcohol and was pretty bad for a good 25 years. She got sober though, proud of her. All four of us kids are strong, independent and have been self employed successfully our whole lives, interesting. I have never resented the responsibility that fell on my shoulders, but I can darn well say I resented the US Gubmint for not bringing my Dad home along with so many others. I also made it my Duty as a father to keep all my boys out of uniform when they grew up. No one has to agree, it was just my take on life. Don’t sacrifice yours for those who don’t care and aren’t willing to win when necessary. I loved my Dad. He was quite a man, warrior, husband, father and leader, fearless.

Skyraider
 
BadMedicine

BadMedicine

Would *I* Lie???
You answered my question as I was writing it. I don't blame you one bit! My dad did 20 years AF and I grew up on AFB's until I was 18... thought briefly about the military during highschool, but Clinton had treated the .mil like shit with major downsizing and "RIFting" in the 90's, a lot of friends parents lost their jobs and they moved away... by the time I was of age india and pakistand were having cross border skirmishes, threatening nukes and SK/NK was super hostile and expected to go hot.... no thank you, "I'll fight the commies here." ...looks like I may get my chance:-/
 
Maryh

Maryh

Veteran Member
Prayers for your family. It was a terrible time back then. One of my friends came back but he was never the same. He turned to alcohol and chain smoking and died at 62. Your mother was a brave woman alone with four children. Each one of us can only take so much pain. Bless her heart. Your Dad is a hero!!
 
D

Deena in GA

Administrator
_______________
Thank you for sharing! My heart broke and continues to break for all the families of the dead and missing! My dad served three tours in VN and we lived in fear of that car pulling up. Even though my dad wasn’t Green Beret, I still can’t hear that song without crying. Of course, I also tear up at the national anthem. ;)
 
ShadowMan

ShadowMan

Designated Grumpy Old Fart
And perhaps even worse was the ones that came home.....but never really came home. Our best friends older brother, who was the greatest big brother you could ask for. Always taking us kids fishing and such, always treating us like BIG kids and so much fun, so alive and just plain cool. He drove an old MGA and would stuff the three of us into it, hit the donut shop for donuts and hot chocolate on the way to lake. Man, so much fun.

But when he came back from Nam, he was nothing but a shell. Vacant eyes, lethargic and just sat in his room at his parents house, watching the TV and smoking pot. I don't think he ever came out of his shell again. We moved away years later and the last I remember seeing him was sitting in his room, zombie like, unshaven and essentially dead to the world. So very sad.

That was such an unnecessary, F'ed up war, not unlike so many of our military misadventures since then with pretty much the same results - FAILURE. Nothing really resolved. Too many dead and walking wounded all with nothing to show for it. It's well past time for the US to pull back from being the policeman of the world and let them take care of themselves and FIX THEIR OWN PROBLEMS!! If Europe doesn't want Russia in Ukraine then Europe needs to get off their ASSES and FIX THE PROBLEM. Why are we sending money to a European problem. Why are we sending taxpayer dollars to Haiti. It's a pit, will always be a pit....and so on down the line!

However, I do fear it's too late for us after all our decades of meddling is other people's business is bring disaster to our shores and payback is going to be a beotch. We've already been infiltrated by MILLIONS and MILLIONS of enemy combatants and it's only a matter of time before we reap the fruits of our failures here on the home front.....DAMN STUPID OF US!! We've been running around trying to save the world and now we can't even save ourselves.
 
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O

OldArcher

Has No Life - Lives on TB
Skyraider said:
One would think by the age of 74, that I would get over it, but I never do. I was the oldest of four children. Back then it was stiff upper lip and make your Dad proud. I still have difficulty sharing or discussing it with others, always feel the tears well up. I shed a few this morning just discussing it with my wife. That’s how it is and there is no shame. It broke my Mom and caused the four of us kids to bond like steel, always had each other‘s back. We actually had quite an interesting life in some ways, traveling this country together and living together in some interesting places. My youngest brother came to live with me at 14 yrs of age, legal guardian, Mom couldn’t keep him in line. Mom herself eventually turned to alcohol and was pretty bad for a good 25 years. She got sober though, proud of her. All four of us kids are strong, independent and have been self employed successfully our whole lives, interesting. I have never resented the responsibility that fell on my shoulders, but I can darn well say I resented the US Gubmint for not bringing my Dad home along with so many others. I also made it my Duty as a father to keep all my boys out of uniform when they grew up. No one has to agree, it was just my take on life. Don’t sacrifice yours for those who don’t care and aren’t willing to win when necessary. I loved my Dad. He was quite a man, warrior, husband, father and leader, fearless.

Skyraider
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You, Sir, are no less with your family. Your Dad would be proud of you. You have kept the faith…

OA
 
D

dvo

Veteran Member
Skyraider said:
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
Click to expand...
A boyhood friend had something similar happen to his father in SE Asia. I felt very badly for him and his family. I never knew the final outcome. It seemed improbable to me in retrospect that his family was living in Muncie Indiana. But that is my childhood remembrance. That damned war near wore us out, or caused the cascade of failure we see to this day. Too many foreign misadventures.
 
AlfaMan

AlfaMan

Has No Life - Lives on TB
Skyraider said:
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
Click to expand...
Wow. Just wow.
Thank you for sharing your grief with the TB2K famly. We're all here for you and each other.

And you are your father's son. Your father was an incredibly brave man, fighting at low level in the jungles of Laos. And proud, and patriotic. A man's man he was.

And he raised a brave proud and patriotic son. To become the man of the family at such a young age; that takes bravery.
To keep going, to keep the family together and succeeding in life.

We send the utmost respect and love for both of you.


And we are so sorry for your, and your family's loss.
 
W

Wildwood

Veteran Member
Skyraider said:
One would think by the age of 74, that I would get over it, but I never do. I was the oldest of four children. Back then it was stiff upper lip and make your Dad proud. I still have difficulty sharing or discussing it with others, always feel the tears well up. I shed a few this morning just discussing it with my wife. That’s how it is and there is no shame. It broke my Mom and caused the four of us kids to bond like steel, always had each other‘s back. We actually had quite an interesting life in some ways, traveling this country together and living together in some interesting places. My youngest brother came to live with me at 14 yrs of age, legal guardian, Mom couldn’t keep him in line. Mom herself eventually turned to alcohol and was pretty bad for a good 25 years. She got sober though, proud of her. All four of us kids are strong, independent and have been self employed successfully our whole lives, interesting. I have never resented the responsibility that fell on my shoulders, but I can darn well say I resented the US Gubmint for not bringing my Dad home along with so many others. I also made it my Duty as a father to keep all my boys out of uniform when they grew up. No one has to agree, it was just my take on life. Don’t sacrifice yours for those who don’t care and aren’t willing to win when necessary. I loved my Dad. He was quite a man, warrior, husband, father and leader, fearless.

Skyraider
Click to expand...
Your post touches me deeply. My father was in VN at that same time and to be honest, it was a miracle he made it home. He was in the thick of the fighting and lived through some horrific battles. We would have continued in ignorant bliss but one of his buddies over there, made it home several months before him and came by to check on us...the idiot told my mother all about it and since I was still awake in the next room, I heard it all. I was 12 while he was there and old enough to understand the risks. Like you, I vowed that my husband and children would not be in the military.

Make no mistake, I have huge respect and thankfulness for our soldiers and nobody is more patriotic than me but I just couldn't face sending another loved one into a hell hole like VN. I was always a serious child and much too aware of what the risks were. DH had a bad draft number and I was so thankful when they ended it not long before he turned 18. When our boys were in high school and the local recruiters started calling, I firmly told them not to ever even consider talking to my boys.

My heart hurts for you and I understand those tears. Even though I did get my father back, he was changed. I still tear up sometimes when I remember the agony of that time and all that my father suffered through over there and the constant fear we'd get one of those visits. I had the honor of caring for him in his last decade and he eventtually shared some of what it was like.
 
J

JeanCat

Veteran Member
Skyraider said:
March 13, 1968, 56 years ago, the Day my Dad went down in his A1 Skyraider and disappeared in the jungle of Laos with his copilot Major Barnes. By this time in the morning, the staff car had already pulled in, out front of the house and the knock had come on the door. My Mom was already a puddle laying across the kitchen table. I remember it all so clearly, seared into my brain. I was upstairs in our room getting ready for school, senior year, when I heard her call out my name. I turned and looked out the window and saw the staff car parked out front. I remember turning back and leaning against the wall, knowing what was waiting down stairs, took a big breath and headed down to deal with the situation. I still miss him

Skyraider
Click to expand...
Skyraider, there was a church I attended in Jackson, MS, that had a pilot disappear in Vietnam. I don’t remember where. The family’s name was Luna. I think he was returned sometime after the war. Very, very sad.
 
J

JeanCat

Veteran Member
JeanCat said:
Skyraider, there was a church I attended in Jackson, MS, that had a pilot disappear in Vietnam. I don’t remember where. The family’s name was Luna. I think he was returned sometime after the war. Very, very sad.
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I just looked him up on the internet. It was Donald A Luna. He disappeared near Khe Sanh. He was flying a Cessna. Your dad and all these men should be remembered. His remains were returned in 2000.
 
9

9idrr

Veteran Member
I salute your Dad. One can feel helpless at home when loved ones are in harm's way. Our daughter did 8 years in USNavy, including when she re-upped in the combat zone. She even had orders for a gator freighter cruise in '06 but those changed. Good thing, too, 'cause she may not have made it chowin' down on crayons. ;)
Here's to all families of those who've served or are serving.
 
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