CFI --Mountain Home Comments
- Thread starter Chapulin
- Start date
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
thanks bro.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
so, does it sound reasonable? far fetched? would you do anything different?
not that i'll necessarily change this one, but i'll use whatever advice i get for any future stories.
not that i'll necessarily change this one, but i'll use whatever advice i get for any future stories.
GREYGHOSTt
Contributing Member
Might be time to fire up the ham set and listen! There might be a few cq's out there. Don't give up now type em type em!!! 
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
lol, i'll see what i can do.
GREYGHOSTt
Contributing Member
Glad it see they are branching out!! Nice touch on the radio equipment!
I'm sending some one over to oil your key board to help speed up the typing
!
You are way behind on those other 30 chapters
..
I'm sending some one over to oil your key board to help speed up the typing
!You are way behind on those other 30 chapters
..
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
Thank you GG, the comments i get are the only things that keep me going most of the time, even critical comments are better then nothing.
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
Jusat started the story seems pretty good so far 
& I like a clean story , for intertainment.
& I like a clean story , for intertainment.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
thank you sara
GREYGHOSTt
Contributing Member
Now that everyone is flying time to improve the air force?
Guess it wont be very long now we can hear the pitter patter of littler feet!
You are still behind 29 chapters
!
Faster faster more more!!!!!!
Guess it wont be very long now we can hear the pitter patter of littler feet!
You are still behind 29 chapters
!Faster faster more more!!!!!!
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
oh now waiting for the REST of the story.Enjoyed very much. ")
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
don't worry, the young couple will have a new addition very soon...
as to the airforce, you still haven't seen everything Jack had to start with. notice i said "the c-2 was the largest aircraft he had that would fit on the elevator"? well, he's got a couple more in a hangar at mountain home municipal airport.
as to the airforce, you still haven't seen everything Jack had to start with. notice i said "the c-2 was the largest aircraft he had that would fit on the elevator"? well, he's got a couple more in a hangar at mountain home municipal airport.
Enjoying
HI CFI, I just wanted to tell you I am enjoying the story. I was wondering how long you had been working on this story. I always find it interesting to see how different folks approach the writing process. I guess that is the teacher in me LOL! Do you have everything planned out in your mind already, or are you surprised at the turns the story is taking?
HI CFI, I just wanted to tell you I am enjoying the story. I was wondering how long you had been working on this story. I always find it interesting to see how different folks approach the writing process. I guess that is the teacher in me LOL! Do you have everything planned out in your mind already, or are you surprised at the turns the story is taking?
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
hi jenn. actually, while i have a VERY rough idea of what may happen later on in the story, i basically do each chapter as i get to it. for instance, i have basically no idea what the next chapter will be about right now, but i'll get it written sometime tonight anyway.
the basic premise of building a home in a missile silo is one i've thought about for years, but it's been this past year of reading "doomer fiction" on frugal squirrel that's gotten me into writing this story. also, i wanted to present biblical truths in a way that unbelievers would be willing to read.
i do know of a few things i want to have in the future, and i know that eventually pam and jack will get married (i think, that could change), but other than that, it's all as new to me as it is to you all.
the basic premise of building a home in a missile silo is one i've thought about for years, but it's been this past year of reading "doomer fiction" on frugal squirrel that's gotten me into writing this story. also, i wanted to present biblical truths in a way that unbelievers would be willing to read.
i do know of a few things i want to have in the future, and i know that eventually pam and jack will get married (i think, that could change), but other than that, it's all as new to me as it is to you all.
That sounds like fun, CFI. So, it is almost a surpise for you also. That is the way it is with a lot of writers. They think the story is going to go in one direction, and then the characters sort of take over themselves. I guess one gets to thinking as the character would think, without even realizing it.
Keep it up. This is a great start to writing! I hope that next chapter comes to your mind quickly, because I'm WAITING to read it.
Keep it up. This is a great start to writing! I hope that next chapter comes to your mind quickly, because I'm WAITING to read it.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
it does seem to have a mind of it's own sometimes, and it can be like riding a half broke horse getting it to go where i want it to go.
i'll have a new chapter up tonight, one a day or so is about all i can manage right now.
i'll have a new chapter up tonight, one a day or so is about all i can manage right now.
Where Is It???
Ok, CFI, where is my next Chapter??????? I'm waiting, impatiently, I might add, to find out more about the old man.
You've been getting these chapters out so fast, I was expecting a new one tonight LOL! You've spoiled me, it is ALL YOUR FAULT!
Get busy!
Seriously, I know it isn't as easy as it looks. I just want you to know I'm enjoying the story and look forward to each installment.
Ok, CFI, where is my next Chapter??????? I'm waiting, impatiently, I might add, to find out more about the old man.
You've been getting these chapters out so fast, I was expecting a new one tonight LOL! You've spoiled me, it is ALL YOUR FAULT!
Get busy!
Seriously, I know it isn't as easy as it looks. I just want you to know I'm enjoying the story and look forward to each installment.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
sorry folks, but God seems to have had other plans for me today. i was in a funk, unable to write at all, then when i took a nap i had a vision, and felt compelled to post "The Light" in the main forum. here's a link to it for anyone that's interested in reading it: http://www.timebomb2000.com/vb/showthread.php?t=131464
and as soon as it was up, i was able to write the next chapter. it's up and waiting now.
and as soon as it was up, i was able to write the next chapter. it's up and waiting now.
Normallguy
"just a human bein'"
Excellent!!!!!
Looking forward to more.
I like your style and storyline.
Faith moves uncooperative bulls.
Looking forward to more.
I like your style and storyline.
Faith moves uncooperative bulls.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
thank you normallguy, i'll get another chapter up as soon as i can.
sssarawolf
Has No Life - Lives on TB
OK waiting for Chap. 22 As u see i have a hard time waiting,lol
waiting for Chap. 22 As u see i have a hard time waiting,lol
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
sorry folks, was busy helping a friend the past few days. i'll get another chapter written sometime today...promise.
Dixiecooking
Contributing Member
I just wanted to Thank You for your writing this story. I have been enjoying it alot . More PLEASE!!!!
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
soon, soon. patience, lol...
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
time schedule? i don't follow you?
Doctor Needed
Good chapter CFI! The delivery of the babies made me think of a book I read to my students a couple of years ago. It is called The Girl Who Owned a City. In this book all the people over 12 die from a plague, and this 12 year old ends up doing an appendectomy on another child. It really makes you think of what it would be like for someone to be dangerously ill and no doctor to help. But, your Jack probably has some medical books in that clinic, and somebody could at least try, I suppose. I'm not sure Jack could handle it though LOL!
Good chapter CFI! The delivery of the babies made me think of a book I read to my students a couple of years ago. It is called The Girl Who Owned a City. In this book all the people over 12 die from a plague, and this 12 year old ends up doing an appendectomy on another child. It really makes you think of what it would be like for someone to be dangerously ill and no doctor to help. But, your Jack probably has some medical books in that clinic, and somebody could at least try, I suppose. I'm not sure Jack could handle it though LOL!
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
he is kind of a wimp about some things, huh?
maybe i'll do a story on the premise you suggest sometime, it'd be interesting to see where it might lead.
maybe i'll do a story on the premise you suggest sometime, it'd be interesting to see where it might lead.
"Time Schedule"
Your characters flew a C130 from Idaho to New York, leaving at 2 something Mtn time arriving in time for dawn light in Eastern time. That struck me as a little quick. So I found the speed of a C130 to be a little faster than I thought, that circle distance would help keep the distance down and a liberal interpretation of dawn light and decided I didn't have a problem!
Chap
Your characters flew a C130 from Idaho to New York, leaving at 2 something Mtn time arriving in time for dawn light in Eastern time. That struck me as a little quick. So I found the speed of a C130 to be a little faster than I thought, that circle distance would help keep the distance down and a liberal interpretation of dawn light and decided I didn't have a problem!
Chap
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
lol, i checked out the average speed of the plane and figured time on the ground was a useful variable.
please do let me know if you find i made a mistake somewhere, i'd really prefer to fix it than just let it go.
please do let me know if you find i made a mistake somewhere, i'd really prefer to fix it than just let it go.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
lol, you're like the third person to mention a series. let's see if i can finish this one first, ok?
thank you for the kind words...i just hope it's really even half as good as you say.
thank you for the kind words...i just hope it's really even half as good as you say.
CFI this is your story and I know I'm free to start my own, but you have the skill!
Human nature before the Incident would have expected a splitter group leave within the first 200 incomers?
Amazing luck keeping the wolves out and only finding wool (since sheep are a little taboo around TB2k) to bring in. I would have expected a nut group to cloak to get in and plot a mutiny within the first thousand.
I'm not trying to twist your story and have enjoyed your plots. So count this as discussion around your story more than future plot twists.
Chap
Human nature before the Incident would have expected a splitter group leave within the first 200 incomers?
Amazing luck keeping the wolves out and only finding wool (since sheep are a little taboo around TB2k) to bring in. I would have expected a nut group to cloak to get in and plot a mutiny within the first thousand.
I'm not trying to twist your story and have enjoyed your plots. So count this as discussion around your story more than future plot twists.
Chap
You make a good point Chapulin, I had expected problems also. But, maybe these people have just been trying to survive so long alone, that they are grateful and happy to be with others. Also, it would be predictable for there to be characters trying to take over already. Apparently both of us were expecting it, so I think it is probably a good thing that they haven't. For me, it is more interesting to read things that aren't so predictable or that stick to some formula.
Once everyone got comfortable in the new surroundings, and things got back to what they consider normal, the problems would surely start. Somebody is bound to think they can do things better, or it is just their RIGHT to take over because they are who they are. Jack is being very generous with everything, because he feels that is what he is supposed to do, or he did up until the last chapter, when some doubt set in. You know, Jack had prepared well for this situation. I have wondered if he has another such place, maybe smaller tucked away somewhere, that nobody knows about. He doesn't seem the type to put all his eggs in one basket, and he had the money to prepare other places. If problems arise, maybe he'll have somewhere for his main group to escape to.
It will be interesting to see what direction CFI takes the story.
Once everyone got comfortable in the new surroundings, and things got back to what they consider normal, the problems would surely start. Somebody is bound to think they can do things better, or it is just their RIGHT to take over because they are who they are. Jack is being very generous with everything, because he feels that is what he is supposed to do, or he did up until the last chapter, when some doubt set in. You know, Jack had prepared well for this situation. I have wondered if he has another such place, maybe smaller tucked away somewhere, that nobody knows about. He doesn't seem the type to put all his eggs in one basket, and he had the money to prepare other places. If problems arise, maybe he'll have somewhere for his main group to escape to.
It will be interesting to see what direction CFI takes the story.
Christian for Israel
Knight of Jerusalem
ROFLOL, folks, am i THAT transparant? yes, there's a certain person coming who has...shall we say...selfish intentions. and there are bad groups out there as well, but we'll get to them soon enough. remember that, due to the nature of this crisis (only those immune survived, somewhere around 30,000 worldwide), no pre-plague group survived. at most only one or two from any one group at any rate. and precious few have been able to organize before coming to the complex, so no one has been able to organize any new groups yet. mostly that first year people were just happy to be alive after more than a year trying to survive on their own. also, there was a great deal of work done during that time, and the kind of people you mention usually don't take to hard work very well. if any were there in the beginning, everyone who worked while they belly-ached would run them outta town on a rail, so to speak.
after things settle down we'll see some interesting changes, believe me. we'll also see some returning characters, but i don't want to give away too much just yet.
thank you both for your comments, your take on how this should go is a great help to me. please, keep the analysis coming.
after things settle down we'll see some interesting changes, believe me. we'll also see some returning characters, but i don't want to give away too much just yet.
thank you both for your comments, your take on how this should go is a great help to me. please, keep the analysis coming.