She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver
won't stop staring at her.
She asks him why he is staring.
"I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."
"My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have
been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just
about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask
that I would find offensive."
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."
She res ponds,
"Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single
and #2, you must be Catholic."
The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and
"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."
The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker
But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
"My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?"
"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married
and I'm Jewish."
The nun says, "That's OK.
My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party."
A dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union house?"
"No," she replied, "I'm sorry it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $80 and the girls get $20," she answered
Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, "Why yes sir, this is a union house.
We observe all union rules."
The man asked, "And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?" "The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."
"That's more like it!" the union man said.
He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive blonde.
"I'd like her," he said.
"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 92-year old woman in the corner, "but Ethel here has 67 years seniority and according to union rules, she's next."