Bad Hand
Veteran Member
At one time in my life I was an outlaw biker this was during the late 60’s early 70’s. I built and road custom Harleys, Indians, and Triumphs. Being and biker at that time meant I was continually harassed by the police. It was always flashing lights, pull over, first questions “drivers license, registration, and safety inspection sticker. That was bad but not as bad as it would get.
Up against the car hands on the top of the car and a pat down by the badge monkey, when that was over it was “Next time I see you I am going to pull you over. This was getting old so I had to come up with away to make them to never want to pat me down ever again.
At this time there was a news story about a serial kill that the cops in California had just caught besides being a murderer he was also a cannibal they caught him chewing on the finger of one of his victims. Totally grossed out the cops, this gave me an Idea.
Beaver have hind feet that feel almost human hands and I happened to have a couple of really big beaver hind feet in the deep freeze. So I thawed them out over night and the next evening when I was going riding I put one in each pocket of my leather coat, this was going to be fun.
Later the evening sure enough the cop pulled me over and it was the same old routine divers license and all that carp. Then came the up against the car hands on the top feet spread and the pat down. I had positioned myself so that I could see what he was doing in the review mirror.
He stated under my arms patting me down when he got to my coat pockets I could see the grin on his face because he just knew he had finally busted me for something. He felt the lump through the leather and reached in with both hands. Suddenly he had this really shocked look on his face. He glanced at my hands to make sure they were still on the top of the car as he brought out the 2 feet. His verbal response was “HO MY GOD” as he dropped the feet on the ground then wiping his hands on his pants.
I had a hard time trying not to laugh, everything was legal including my trapping license. There wasn’t anything he could do.
It wasn’t 2 days later when the cops pulled me over again. This time the cop that had patted me down was ridding shot gun in the car. So the new cop has me up against the car, starting the pat down and just as he starts to reach into my pockets to see what caused the lumps the in my coat pockets were the cop in the car screamed “Don’t reach into his pockets you don’t want to know what is in there”.
That was the end of the pat downs but not the end of the harassment I still had to find away to stop that. I finally did but that happened by accident, but that is another story.
Up against the car hands on the top of the car and a pat down by the badge monkey, when that was over it was “Next time I see you I am going to pull you over. This was getting old so I had to come up with away to make them to never want to pat me down ever again.
At this time there was a news story about a serial kill that the cops in California had just caught besides being a murderer he was also a cannibal they caught him chewing on the finger of one of his victims. Totally grossed out the cops, this gave me an Idea.
Beaver have hind feet that feel almost human hands and I happened to have a couple of really big beaver hind feet in the deep freeze. So I thawed them out over night and the next evening when I was going riding I put one in each pocket of my leather coat, this was going to be fun.
Later the evening sure enough the cop pulled me over and it was the same old routine divers license and all that carp. Then came the up against the car hands on the top feet spread and the pat down. I had positioned myself so that I could see what he was doing in the review mirror.
He stated under my arms patting me down when he got to my coat pockets I could see the grin on his face because he just knew he had finally busted me for something. He felt the lump through the leather and reached in with both hands. Suddenly he had this really shocked look on his face. He glanced at my hands to make sure they were still on the top of the car as he brought out the 2 feet. His verbal response was “HO MY GOD” as he dropped the feet on the ground then wiping his hands on his pants.
I had a hard time trying not to laugh, everything was legal including my trapping license. There wasn’t anything he could do.
It wasn’t 2 days later when the cops pulled me over again. This time the cop that had patted me down was ridding shot gun in the car. So the new cop has me up against the car, starting the pat down and just as he starts to reach into my pockets to see what caused the lumps the in my coat pockets were the cop in the car screamed “Don’t reach into his pockets you don’t want to know what is in there”.
That was the end of the pat downs but not the end of the harassment I still had to find away to stop that. I finally did but that happened by accident, but that is another story.
